Dorothy Catalonia scowled down at the open file on her desk without seeing it, not sure whether she wanted to kiss or kill Duo Maxwell. Why did he have to make me feel like a person again, even if it was just for a moment? I don’t want to feel like a human. I don’t like humans. She ignored the fact that the main reason she didn’t like people was that most of them didn’t like her. They all are so damn quick to point fingers and spread blame. Like none of them have ever made mistakes or done something they regretted. The thought made her laugh, a bitter sound completely without humor. Of course, most of them weren’t responsible for destroying an entire chain of islands full of innocent people.

Shaking her head, she shoved long blond hair back behind one ear and tried to make herself focus on the file. But the words kept blurring into memories of the pain in a pair of haunted violet eyes. Maxwell… why did he bother to talk to me? Was he that desperate for company? I think the other pilots would have preferred to chew off a limb or two to avoid spending time in my company. Especially Quatre Winner. Not that I can really blame him. Sticking three feet of steel into someone’s stomach does tend to negate any sort of friendship possibilities afterwards.

She sighed, and gave up on the file in disgust. And why the hell did I tell him that I knew about the Maxwell Church Massacre? The one person that has voluntarily spoken to me in months, and I try to make sure he hates me too— way to go. No wonder they call me the Wicked Witch of the East. I suppose that means they all wish I had been on Hawaii when we dropped the sky on it. I just wish I had such a thing as silver slippers….[1]

Closing the file, she glanced at her computer. “You don’t hate me though, do you?”

Aware that talking to her computer could be considered unbalanced by everyone with the possible exception of Heero Yuy, she forced herself to keep the remainder of the conversation silent as she laid a cold hand on the monitor. The main menu opened beneath her palm.

You still talk to me… all too much. That thought made her smile again. Yet another reason for everyone to hate me if they knew that I could still hear the Epyon system talking to me—a year after it was destroyed. God… maybe I am nuts.

You hear me… you talk back….

That’s not a good thing…

Good/not good In her imagination the system shrugged.

I’m not listening to you tonight… Deliberately blocking out the computer’s voice, she took her hand off the monitor and put it back on the keyboard as she logged onto the network. Hoping for a distraction from her self-pity, she was nevertheless startled when her computer informed her that she had an email. Huh? Who the hell is emailing me?

Curiosity compelled her to click on the message. Maxwell… might have known. The message was short, consisting of only four words.

/I did mean it. D/

For the first time in months, her smile was almost human.

* * *

Dorothy blinked as a fresh cup of coffee appeared beside her empty one. Glancing up, she was somehow not surprised to see Maxwell seating himself across from her at the corner table.

“Another early morning?” She asked, only half sarcastically. “You look like Hell.”

“Thanks,” he muttered, shoving long bangs out of his eyes. “I was afraid I wasn’t getting the look right….”

“I think you’ve got it nailed.” She shook her head. “If I were you, I’d avoid Dr. Po for a few days.”

“Already planning on it.” He sighed heavily. “Last time she saw me she made me take a night off… not gonna do that again.” As if realizing that he’d revealed too much, he flushed and shut up.

“Nightmares?”

“Yeah… Zechs wants me to get her to give me something to make me sleep. But I really don’t like sleeping pills… and they just make it really hard to wake up if I do have a nightmare.”

“Ah…” She nodded. I know that feeling only too well.

There was an uncomfortable silence for a bit.

“You do realize that you have to sleep eventually?” She finally pointed out.

“I sleep… sorta.” He sighed. “A couple hours a night…”

“And that a constant diet of coffee and stale donuts is not a good thing?”

“Yes Mom.” He scowled at her, and she winced again at the dark circles around the once bright eyes.

“Well, obviously you need one…” she growled back.

“I’m fine.”

“Of course you are. That’s why you’re talking to me. A sure sign of sanity right there….”

“You know, people might like you more if you liked yourself even a little bit.”

“And you know so much about other people?” She snapped—and suddenly felt the rush of anger subside. “Sorry.”

“S’okay,” he shrugged. “I’ve been a little snappy myself.”

“You just have to be a goddamned saint, don’t you?” She asked wearily.

“Well… I can’t be a Gundam saint anymore, we blew those up. And I have known for years that God hates me. Damning me was only the logical next step.”

“You don’t like yourself much either, do you?”

He blinked at her in surprise, and seemed to consider it for a moment. “No. Not… really.”

“You do know that those who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones at others?”

“Yeah. But I don’t like my house much.”

To her surprise, she found herself laughing at that. The rusty, unfamiliar sound scared her, and she found herself taking shelter in Bitch Mode.

“Maybe I do,” she snarled, trying not to look like she was running away as she left the table abruptly.

* * *

Safely back in her office, she rested her face in her hands. “Well, that was smooth….”

“I wouldn’t give it a lot of points for tact,” Duo said quietly. She jumped, staring at him in shock.

“What are you doing here?”

“Apologizing…” He sighed. “I…really didn’t mean to upset you again. I was trying to make a joke. Obviously it failed.”

Her mouth opened and closed again when she couldn’t think of anything to say.

“So… am I forgiven for tossing stones at your house?” he slowly prompted; sounding genuinely worried that she was angry with him.

“That depends on whether or not you intend to keep doing it,” she finally managed to say.

“Well… It was nice to hear you laugh.” He shrugged. “So I can’t promise that I won’t toss the occasional rock.” He smiled, and some of the haunted look faded away. “But I’ll try to restrain myself.”

“See that you do,” she muttered, but deep inside, part of her was hoping he really would throw a rock big enough to shatter the glass walls she’d built around herself.

* * *

Afterwards, she was never quite sure when she got used to Maxwell joining her on her breaks. He would just appear a few minutes after she did, get his coffee and donut, and sit down across from her at the table with a halfhearted attempt at his formerly blinding grin.

“Are you bugging my office or something?” She finally asked him, shaking her head.

“Huh?”

“We don’t even work on the same floor. How do you always know when I’m on my way here?”

“Just lucky?” He shrugged. “I never really thought about it….”

“Ah. So hanging out with me is purely an accident?” She was surprised to hear the disappointment in her voice.

“Nah… just saves me from having to go back to your office and drag you down here so I have someone to eat with.” He managed more of a grin this time.

“So why don’t you just drag Zechs down here with you in the first place?”

“I swear that man would die if he had to eat a donut.” Duo snickered a little. “Must be some weird social hang-up you aristocratic types have. I think Quatre thought I was playing a prank on him the first time I tried to get him to eat one. Wufei just sneered.”

“Hmm, other than the utter lack of nutrition, the thought of you on more sugar is a truly frightening thought.”

“Hey, never underestimate the power of a good sugar rush,” he mumbled around a mouthful of donut.

“Since it is the only thing besides coffee that appears to keep you functioning, I won’t.” She sighed. “It’s just that the ones here are… stale. I prefer my donuts fresh, hot, and filled with chocolate icing.”

“Oooh. So you admit to eating donuts, you’re just a snob about it. It’s all so clear now….”

“Asshole.”

“Always.” He smirked faintly. “That I will freely confess to….”

Dorothy started to reply, then blinked as she caught sight of Zechs standing in the doorway to the cafeteria. Duo turned to see what had caught her attention, and waved at his erstwhile office-mate. Zechs nodded, almost stiffly, and vanished into the line to get something to eat.

“You mind if he joins us…?” Duo asked quietly, noticing the still look on her face with a frown.

“I… suppose not,” she muttered, not sure how to feel. She had not spoken more than a few words to Zechs since the Libra was destroyed at the end of the war. It was more than a little disconcerting for her to face her former commander like this. A moment later, Zechs hesitated beside the table, holding a bottle of water and an apple in one hand.

“Wanna sit?” Duo invited, scooting over a little to allow Zechs to pull the chair out.

Zechs didn’t speak for a long moment, watching her silently as if asking permission.

“He’ll whine until you do.” She finally managed. Zechs was still eyeing her with that silent appraisal that told her he was feeling as awkward as she was. After a long moment, he pulled the chair out and sat as well.

“So this is where you vanish to every morning.” He glanced at Duo with a curious look. “I’m not…interrupting anything, am I?”

“Only a fascinating discussion on the merits of donuts.” Duo shrugged. “What dragged you out of the office?”

“Unlike some people, I do not live on a constant supply of coffee.” The blond smiled. The light banter seemed to be relaxing him, and he flipped a long section of white-blond hair over his shoulder before leaning back in his chair.

“Yeah, yeah.” Duo sighed. “This is a conspiracy, right?” He looked at Dorothy accusingly. “You put him up to this, didn’t you.”

“No,” she muttered uncomfortably, then managed to relax. “Though I might have if I thought it would do any good.”

Duo just rolled his eyes. Dorothy found herself smiling at him, in spite of herself.

“You should smile more often,” he said softly, sounding suddenly serious. She felt the painful flush across her cheeks and glared at him.

“What, and destroy her reputation?” To her surprise, it was Zechs who rescued the moment. “That wouldn’t do. Then Une wouldn’t have anything to threaten the new recruits with.”

“Sure she would.” Duo grinned. “There’s always you.”

* * *
A/N: [1] This is a reference to the Wizard of Oz. The wicked witch of the East was the one flattened by Dorothy's house, and the original owner of the magical shoes. In the original books by Frank L Baum, the slippers were silver. They were changed to ruby slippers in the movie for more dramatic effect.