Disclaimer: We only own Jaden.

Warning: NC-17, yes there will be graphic *sex* in here, both slash and het. There will also be a bit of underage sex and two brothers kissing (Hey, we couldn't leave the Elrics clueless forever!). Also mention of rape and the messy death of some baddies later plus some spoilers for the various series like FMA.

Author's Notes: This is a crossover with Yu Yu Hakusho, Ronin Warriors, Rurouni Kenshin, Ranma 1/2, InuYasha, FullMetal Alchemist, Vampire Hunter D, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Under Seige, Highlander the Series, The Crow: Stairway to Heaven, YuGiOh, SG1, Harry Potter, Gundam Wing, and X-Men. To find out more about the animes, go to http://www.absoluteanime.com/index.html and look 'em up by Anime Profiles.

FanFic Writer Does Multiverse!
Special Edition
12/26/05

“Time to wake up, Pretty One,” was what Jaden had nuzzled ever so softly into her ear as she floated up to consciousness. “Someone as lovely as you hardly needs any more beauty sleep, “ Kurama continued in a rumbling purr while his fox’s tail came around and tickled her nose just a bit. Jaden swam a little closer to wakefulness, enjoying being held until a clawed hand trailed up and down her arm, just barely denting the skin. "If you don't open your eyes and allow me to gaze into them for a while, I will have to pout before tying you to my bed."

With that interesting threat murmured in her ear Jaden came fully awake with a snap, levitating off the strange bed and landing with her back against the wall next to a slightly open door.

Kurama smirked, flashing his fangs at her even as he sprawled enticingly across the bed. "I haven't seen someone move like that since Yusuke dropped an ice cube in his lap."

Jaden blinked owlishly for a few seconds then you could see the cobwebs clear, “KURAMA?!?!?! The hell…….? What the flocking hell is going on?!”

“Tsk, tsk, such language out of such a pretty mouth.” Folding his arms in front of him like a content cat, Kurama flicked an ear at her. "I was rather curious to know why so many were chasing you so I decided to steal you and see for myself." runs golden eyes deliberately over her body. "And I confess that I like what I see."

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, back that up. What do you mean so many chasing me? I dreamt that entire fiasco, it was a lesson in Mexican and Chinese aren’t mix and match,” Jaden babbled a little frantically as she realized that the kitsune was referring to her race across fandoms a few months ago.

Slipping off the bed, he stalked over to her, backing her against the door before leaning a hand against the door over her shoulder and shaking a finger at her. "You might want to think that, but that's not what I saw," he remarked in a sing-song voice.

Jaden smirked then snapped her teeth at the kitsune’s finger, cause him to jerk it back out of reflex, “Don’t wave body parts in front of my face unless you like teeth, hon. And just what do you think you saw, humm?”

Chuckling, Kurama rested his other hand over her other shoulder, trapping her against the door with his body. "I saw a *very* attractive young woman running from the unwanted advances of talentless louts who couldn't seduce a nymphomaniac into their bed."

“Oh, hunny, you’re just begging to get dropped into one of those fandoms for some good old fashion ravishment aren’t you?” Jaden teased as she tried to phase herself through the door.

He studied her carefully, an amused smirk on his lips.

Jaden last about three minutes before she gave into her curiosity and asked exasperatedly, “Okay. What?”

"I'm trying to figure out how to get you out of your clothes and into my fur," he purred, a smirk on his face as he leaned in to steal a kiss.

Jaden waited until the very last half second then ducked under an arm and smirked at him from across the room as she watched him passionately kiss the door. “Darlin’, as soft as that fur probably is, it looks like there’s only room for one in there.” She snarked as Kurama slowly turned around.

"A challenge," he purred, looking completely unembarrassed at just having kissed the door. "It's been *quite* a while since I had a challenge. Will you run from me as well? I promise I will be a better hunter than the others have been."

Jaden eeped as she started edging towards the window, {Okay, this is anime so if I jump out the window I won’t get hurt, right?} She thought to herself as she edged a couple more inches and watched that fox like a hawk.

At her movements, his smirk grew even more sharp and predatory as his tail lashed in excitement. "It has been too long since I had such a worthy prize to chase," he remarked, shifting his weight slightly even as one hand rose to his silver mane.

{Shit! Him and his bloody seeds. Watch his eyes and be prepared to move, girlfriend, cause you’re only going to get one shot at this.} Jaden told herself as she instinctively settled into a half forgotten modified battle stance.

He blinked innocent golden eyes at her. "I'm not going to attack you, Precious One. That would mar your lovely skin and only marks of passion should stain the surface of your body."

“I know you wouldn’t hurt me on purpose but old training dies hard.” Jaden soothed as she shifted her weight just a bit more. “Besides I thought you wanted a chase!” With that Jaden jumped out the window and hit the ground running, giggling as madly as her pace would allow.

There was a startled yelp behind her before the sound of feet hitting the ground and pounding footsteps followed her down the road.

“Gotta love animes, man! And since I’m a Mary-Sue in an anime fic I’m damn near invincible. And, hey, this time I don’t have my glasses to worry about! Rock on!!!” Was the literately running dialogue that people on the street heard as the strange blonde sped past.

Arms clad in green and white armor snaked out of a nearby alley and grabbed her, pulling her into the alley and against an armored form as one hand went over her mouth to prevent any outcries.

Jaden eyes widen alarmingly as she struggled against her new captor, bruising her heel a bit when she fell back on old instincts and tried to nut the guy.

"Easy. I'm not going to hurt you," murmured a soft voice in her ear as the arms pulled her tighter against the armored form even as her captor shrank back into the darker shadows in the alley, pulling her with him.

“Like I’m supposed to believe you!” Was what Jaden tried to snark but with the hand still covering her mouth it came out a bit muffled. {Damn! I can’t even bite his hand! Wait a minute!} Jaden quickly glanced at what she could see of this guy. {White and green armor. Why does that sound familiar? Think girl think! White and green, white and green, white and gre…… Oh shit! It’s Sage from the Ronins.}

A silver streak raced past the alley as Kurama continued racing down the way Jaden had been running and only when the fox had long since passed did the armored arms release her. "You'll be safe now," remarked Sage Date, Bearer of the Halo Armor, as he moved to stand in front of her, a smile on his face and warmth in his one visible violet eye.

Jaden stared at him for a few moments then squealed and jumped at him, hugging him for all he was worth. “Ohmygod! It’s been forever since I’ve seen any of you guys!” She squeezed him tight one more time then stepped back a whapped him upside the head, “Don’t you ever scare me like that again, you baka! I turn mean!”

Flipping his hair back to get it to fall in its perfect style, Sage folded his arms and smirked at her. "The I suppose next time you're being chased by an overanxious fox, I'll step aside and let him capture you, hm?"

Jaden sniffed, “And just what makes you think he could catch me? I’m a fast and slippery little thing when I’ve a mind to be.”

Sage smirked and took a step closer to her. "I caught you," he replied before jerking his head in the direction Kurama had run. "Besides, you were heading straight for a park."

“Yeah. You caught me, by surprise. So what’s the sitch with the park? The Starlights playing there today or something?” Jaden snarked as she matched him step for step.

A soft chuckle escaped from Sage. "You have forgotten that Kurama's a Master of Plants already?" he teased. "You would have been a sitting target for him." A sly smile crossed his face. "And perhaps I wanted to save you for myself.'

Jaden smacked herself on the forehead, “Shit! I did forget that. Man, I need caffeine. Note to self: Find a caffeine pusher….soon. As for you, mister man, what makes you think you’re going to have any better luck than the fox?”

He gently grasped her hand and raised it to his lips, brushing a gentlemanly kiss across her knuckles. "Because, I know how to treat a lady with respect."

{Gulp! A gentleman rogue, almost as bad as Scribe’s P.O.G. with me. Okay, steady girl, you’ve only met two of the characters which means you can still get away.} She mental coached herself as she tried not to melt.

Stepping back, Sage closed his eyes briefly as his armor flared green for a second only to be replaced by a pair of neat khakis and a green silk shirt. "Would you care for lunch at a nearby restaurant? You must be hungry after running so long," he invited, holding out his hand in invitation.

She studied him for a moment, “That depends, you plannin’ to feed my caffeine addiction while you’re at it?”

"Of course," he agreed with a smile as he took her hand and tucked it through his arm before escorting her to an open air restaurant.

Jaden’s eyes darted everywhere, picking and rejecting escape routes and to see if there were any other fandoms around right then as she snorted. {Damn I’m paranoid. But in mary-sueverse the saying: Just because I’m paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not out to get me. Takes on a whole new meaning.} She thought to herself with a light giggle.

Sage signaled for a waiter after holding Jaden's chair for her. "Would you care for coffee or do you wish to have your caffeine cold?" he inquired, claiming the seat across from her with a charming smile.

“Mmmm. Cold and carbonated, please? Coke if they have it, Pepsi if they don’t,” Jaden all but purred in anticipation.

Sage smirked at the waiter. "Hot tea for me and whatever else the lady would like," he stated, leaning back in his chair.

With a thought towards the fact that she’d probably be running again soon, Jaden ordered light foods that would give her energy without being heavy.

"So tell me, why are you running away from all these people, hm?" inquired Sage, raising his visible eyebrow as he regarded Jaden. "Aren't you flattered by the attention?"

Jaden lifted a shoulder, “Sure I guess. But I’m not at all used to it. I don’t look like this in real life so having this much attention of the amorous variety directed towards me automatically makes me nervous. Add to the fact that I like being a tease here since I’m to chicken there and it’s all kinds of fun,” she informed him with a wicked smirk.

Sage chuckled and accepted his tea, saluting her with his cup. "Touche, dear lady."

Jaden finally decided to shut her curiosity up by asking, “Okay. Why aren’t you acting like all the others. I mean the last time this type of thing happened I barely had time to breathe. And this time I had to out dodge a randy kitsune in his own bedroom. While I don’t remember the series that well anymore, I do remember that all the Ronins save Tulpa’s were 16, 17 year old teenagers with the others being 18-19. Those are not the ages of greatest restraint and you mix in mary-sueing…… You see where I’m going with this?”

"Yes, but you forgot the cannon verse where I am quite the ladies man and my grandfather who taught me not only how to treat women but also martial arts," replied Sage in a calm tone. "And even a Mary-Sue needs a breather once in a while."

Jaden leaned over the table and quickly pecked Sage on the lips. “Thanks for that but if you think smoothness that rivals James Bond is going to get you any closer I’m afraid you’re SOL, hun.”

"Well you have to admit that it's a tactic that not too many people would use, and already I'm ahead of everyone else so far," he remarked, taking a sip of his tea as the waiter brought her food.

Jaden nibbled at everything on her plate until most of it was gone then decided it was time to quit pushing her luck and excused herself, “Pardon me, I hear the ladies room calling.”

"If you're going to run away again, you might want to try that direction," remarked Sage in an amused voice as he gestured towards the way they came. "I believe your fox is coming back this way."

“Okay you are officially being to nice about this. It’s un-nerving,” Jaden pouted as she stopped and swung back around to face the Ronin with her hands on her hips.

"More butterflies with honey than vinegar, my dear Jaden," he announced with a slight smirk. "If you wish, I can act like the rest and chase you down the street like an over-crazed teenager, but after a while, I'm sure you would be tired of that and if I treat you decently, I have a better chance of you returning to me voluntarily."

“Damn you have a possible point. Slight though it may be. Tell ya what, if I can track you down later we’ll see what happens. How’s that sound?” Jaden reluctantly said as her hunted rabbit instincts, that only appeared in these things, started going off the scale.

Sage smiled and held up the other half of her sandwich. "Sounds like a plan and you might want to take this for later."

“Thanks. Rabbiting stage left,” Jaden cracked as she darted out onto the street in the direction Sage had pointed out earlier.

Sprinting two blacks, Jaden turned down an alley when she ran into someone, sending them both crashing to the ground, her with a startled yelp and him with a surprised "Oro!'

“Exactly. You’ve got a hard head, you know that?” Jaden replied as she rubbed her chest.

Smiling up at her from where he was sitting on the ground, Kenshin rubbed the slight lump that had appeared. "I was not looking where I was going, I'm afraid," he apologized.

Jaden waved a dismissive hand, “Ahh don’t worry about it. You okay? Granted I’ve got some padding but that still had to have hurt.”

"I am fine, that I am," replied Kenshin, standing up and dusting off his hakama and gi, not looking at her directly.

Jaden ducked her head so she could see under those fiery red bangs of his, “Are you blushing? That is soo cute! Looks like I have another one I can hide behind if I get sick of being chased for a while. Very cool.”

Kenshin's head came up as a firm expression appeared in his violet eyes, turning them almost amber. "It is not right that you are chased so, that it is not," he stated. "If you wish, I will protect you, that I will."

Jaden giggled, “It’s not that bad and actually kinda fun. Most of the cute anime characters I know are good guys so I don’t have to worry about unwilling ravishment and if they forget what no means a swift knee to their pride and joy will remind them quick enough. Thank you for the offer though and I’ll definitely keep it in reserve. ”

Kenshin nodded and glanced out the alley before grabbing her wrist and dragging her farther down the alley. "If one of your pursuers is a silver fox-man, it is best if we leave this place, that it is," he stated, racing through twists and turns of back alleys.

“This is turning into a game of keep-the-author-away-from-the-fox. How amusing for me and frustrating for him,” Jaden mumbled with a giggle as she tried to keep up.

The air wavered around Jaden for a bit and when it cleared, she was standing at the mouth of an alley and Kenshin was no where to be seen.

“Okay. Now what the frock?” She muttered as she cautiously poked her nose out of the alleyway, ready to yank it back in at the first hint of trouble.

"RAMNA YOU PERVERT!"

“SHIT!!!” Jaden screeched as she ducked and covered, peeking out from behind her arms to see what was going on now.

A boy in Chinese style clothing and his hair in a braid raced down the street, determined to get away from the girl following him with a mallet in her hand. Seeing Jaden in the alley, he quickly dashed into it, scooping her up and running farther down the alley.

Jaden just gave an exasperated sigh and asked rather nonchalantly, “Are you looking to get another girl pissed off at you or what?”

Ranma didn't answer until he had ducked into another alley and the girl had run past on her determined hunt for "That Pervert". "Sorry, this was the only way out and I didn't want you caught in the cross fire."

“S’okay. Could you put me down now? I don’t care how much strength training you’ve had I’ve got to be getting heavy,” Jaden replied after she thought about who had been after him and the bad habit that chick had of not caring about innocent bystanders.

Ranma blinked at her before setting her down. "Didn't notice really."

Jaden grinned and gave him a quick peck on the cheek, “Thanks. Girls like to hear that kind of thing. Now, besides having the gall to be alive and breathing what was her problem with you this time?”

Sighing Ranma sat down on a nearby crate and cradled his head in his hands. "It was either Shampoo's blind siding me with hugs and gropes, Kuno trying to take my head with that bokken of his, or Ryoga in his pig form acting like I had nearly killed him when she showed up. Take your pick."

Jaden gave a growl that would have made Spike at his worst sit up and take notice before asking in a deceptively calm voice, “Would you care if I did a little hunting and teaching of manners to some people? This is bullshit and I hated when it was just a fictional story someone made up for fun. When you actually pay attention to what you say and who you’re talking to you’re a gentleman and a sweetie.” She finished as she cuddled the poor boy a bit.

Ranma tensed at first when her arms went around him before he realized that she wasn't going to hurt him. "Why bother? They’ll just start up again once you leave," he sighed, wishing he could find a way out of this life he was trapped in.

“Perfect. So we’re agreed. You’re coming with me when I shift next time and we’ll see about finding you a spot in one of the other fandoms.” Jaden gave a snort. “Hell if worst comes to worst I’ll leave you with the bros and since they’re six foot plus walking, talking mice they can’t really say anything about your curse. Or better yet if I can con whoever’s in charge of my fandom hopping to sidetrack us to those springs we can fix it before hitting the next fandom.” Jaden continued casting a threatening eye towards the sky and whoever was in charge.

Jaden could sense the smirk being thrown their way. {CONSIDER IT DONE. HANG ON.}

Air starts to shimmer again. “And again with the drunken shimmering thing. Joy. Just don't drop me in the spring with him. I suck at gender bender, ask anyone who's played D&D with me.”

{WOULD YOU PREFER A CARTOON SWIRLY THING?}

When the shimmer cleared, they were standing a safe distance away from several ponds that were scattered over the landscape, the closest one being a good twenty feet away.

Jaden sighed in relief, “Thank you.” She turned to Ranma, “So do we have any idea which one we need to dunk you in to fix you?”

Ranma looked around and shrugged. "Not a clue and I can't read Chinese."

She sighed again. “And what I learned I got from Big Bird In China when I was a kid and all of that was speaking.” Looks up at the sky again. “A little translation help if you please?”

{UM, GIVE US A MINUTE.}

“K. Gotta love cooperative PTBs.”

Ranma looked up at the sky. "If I'd known all I had to do was talk to the sky like that, I'da done it years ago!"

“Oh. I’m a special case. See I’m what’s known as a Mary-Sue. Meaning that I don’t actually belong in this reality and get bounced from one fandom to another. Usually with all the desirable main characters of that fandom after my cute butt for sex.” Jaden explained as a slight boom came from the sky to get their attention.

{OKAY, LOOKS LIKE THE SPRING OF THE DROWNED MALE IS THE ONE TO YOUR LEFT. KINDA LOOKS LIKE A KIDNEY FROM HERE.}

“Well, you heard the PTBs go see if you can find it. I’m going to stay right here cause I don’t trust my luck that much,” she said with a little push in the right direction.

Ranma sighed and looked around. There was about three springs to his left but the one in the middle did look a bit odd shaped and more kidney bean-like than the others. Holding his breath, he jumped in and quickly surfaced, hoping it was the right one and letting out a yell of delight when he remained in his natural *male* shape. "YES!!!"

Jaden squealed and jumped up and down clapping. “YAY!!! Now you don’t have to worry about those nasty, liking girls only boys anymore. Course the way Pigboy and Kuno kept coming after you even in boy form I think their repressing but hey, that’s their problem.”

Ranma cackled and waded to the shore, surprised when a new set of clothes in the style he favored appeared next to a couple of large towels.

Jaden blinked at that as well, “Damn! We got nice PTBs this time. Very much of the cool. Has to be a different set than the ones who ran my first Mary-Sue.”

{WHAT? WE CAN'T BE NICE EVEN WHILE ENJOYING YOU RUNNING FROM EVERYONE? WE GOTTA GET OUR KICKS TOO SOMEHOW AND MARY-SUES ARE THE WAY WE DO IT.}

“Hey! Ain’t bitchin’. Much. I’m just sayin’, ‘Sides I know that the first one was Scribe’s fault cause some of her characters got a hold of some of mine,” Jaden backtracked rapidly as she held up her hands in defense.

{SO ANY REQUESTS FOR YOUR NEXT STOP? OR WOULD YOU JUST PREFER TO CHOOSE BETWEEN ANIME AND REALITY?}

Jaden gave a very unlady like snort, “Reality? What’s that? It depends on whither Ranma here wants to find a new fandom to live in now or travel with me for a bit. I would like to stay anime if possible though. If we can’t find anything he likes there then we can go American fandoms.”

{COOL.} The air didn't shimmer this time but it was close and they were standing in the courtyard of a temple where a girl in a uniform was having a loud discussion with a silver haired boy with dog ears. If yelling at the top of their lungs was considered "loud" by most people.

Jaden groaned and buried her head in her hands, muttering, “Note to self: Don’t leave PTBs openings like that.” She looked over at the still arguing couple and raised her voice, “Will you just shut up and kiss her already?! Sheeesh. And people say *I’m* repressed.”

Inyasha turned to glare at the new arrivals. "Why should I do anything like that?" he growled before turning to glare at Kagome. "I'm tired of saving you hide from every demon we come across, so I'll make you a deal. Take off these damn beads and you'll never see me again."

“You do realize she didn’t have to get you off that stupid tree, right? And another thing, grouchy, are all the jewel shards found and safe cause I gotta tell ya, I’m not looking forward to dealing with Naroku or that nose in the air uppity brother of yours,” Jaden asked as she got closer.

Inuyasha turned his glare on Jaden. "I'm still gonna look for the shards, but I'll give 'em to Kaeda. She's always treated me nice unlike *some* I could mention." his glare turned back to Kagome. "Shoulda known better than to get involved with a reincarnation of a bitch."

“Looked in her bedroom mirror lately, hunny?” Jaden snarked under her breath causing Ranma to choke a bit as he tried not to laugh. “Okay, I’ll grant Keiko is a world class bitch and a half. But let’s back this particular argument up a bit so I know what started it.”

Inuyasha snorted. "What else, she didn't listen when I told her that there was a group of demons close by. All she wanted was the shard and then went blundering in to get it and I had to save her ass when she found out that she was hopelessly outnumbered." He snorted and glared at her. "Not even *I* would have taken on that many at once, not if I wanted to make it out again alive and had the Tetseiga as well!"

Jaden nodded then turned to Kagome, “Okay. Why didn’t you believe him when he said it was to many to handle? Think about who said that, Mister There-Is-No-Such-Thing-As-To-Many. I don’t care what kind of holy powers you have that was supremely stupid. He was born and raised in that world which means he knows it a hella lot better than you do, Missy. History books aren’t worth shit most of the time cause they’re written by the people who won.”

Kagome's face flushed in humiliation at the lecture. "I could have gotten the shard without them knowing if dog boy here hadn't decided to crash the party at that moment," she retorted, refusing to back down before either Inuyasha or the strange new couple. "And how do you know so much about him, huh?" She glared at Inuyasha. "Another reincarnated girlfriend of yours?"

Jaden grinned, “Nope. Cause if I was Keiko would never have gotten her sadistic mitts on him and he might still be tied to my bed. I know about all that crap cause I’m a wandering Mary-Sue and Inuyasha is one of my fandoms.” Jaden jerked a thumb towards Ranma. “This poor guy I rescued from his fandom cause it was either get him out of there or I started hunting and killing people for being evil minded bullies who didn’t care if they killed him. So now he’s traveling with me to see if we can find him a new home and a mate to cuddle and coo with.”

Inuyasha looked at Ranma with interest in his golden eyes. "You a good fighter?"

Ranma shrugged, “I’m a master of the Anything Goes School of Fighting and Neko-chan. Though for that to work I have to be in the middle of a panic attack. My Dad decided to toss me in to a hole with starving cats, naked and with food tied to me, to make me learn the style. I was five or there about. Ever since then I’ve been terrified of cats.”

Inuyasha growled and his ears flattened. "Don’t suppose he's around here," he mused, a clawed hand flexing. "He is either the stupidest man on the planet or the craziest. Not even my own family would do something like that and Sesshoumaru's a vicious bastard."

“Nope. Left him in the last fandom. Now you see why I wanted to go through and kill people there and I’m a very sweet and gentle person……. Most of the time.” Jaden chirped as she gave an evil smirk.

Inuyasha flashed her a fang filled grin. "I could get to like you."

“Course you could. I’m a Mary-Sue, any attractive character in whatever fandom I land in thinks I’m just the cutest thing on two feet. I’ll let you keep him *IF* you swear on whatever you hold holy that you’ll tone down your attitude a bit until he’s gets used to you. Deal?” Jaden bargained with a quick grin and wink to Ranma.

Inuyasha glanced at Ranma to find the other teen studying him with just as intense a gaze. "Do you care if you live in this time frame or in the past?" asked Inuyasha. "Not like I can guarantee a roof over your head all the time, but I can definitely promise you a filling meal." Jaden choked then started whistling and looking at the sky when everyone glanced at her.

Ranma grinned. "That's more than I got from Pops, and I don't care where or even when I live really."

Inuyasha nodded before looking at Jaden. "Then I swear, on my honor, that I'll try to tone down my attitude a bit."

Jaden nodded once sharply, “Okay. You know, this is kinda cool. The only time I’ve had to actually run from a character was when Kurama first woke me up. She says jinxing herself totally. Oh, one last thing before whoever upstairs decides I’ve been here to long.” And with that Jaden shot a hand out and carefully petted one of Inuyasha’s ears. “Yep. Just as soft as they look.”

Growling a warning, Inuyasha let her pet his ear, enjoying the contact instead of the tugging that Kagome often put his ears through. "Good, now will you take this damn necklace off, wench?" he growled turning to Kagome with a glare as one clawed finger hooked the prayer beads around his neck in emphasis.

Kagome glared back just as stubborn. "Nope."

Jaden sighed, “Stupid freakin’ female. And people wonder why I write slash.” She reached over and snapped the rosary, scattering beads all over the place. “I don’t remember anyone ever saying someone else couldn’t take it off him, just that he couldn’t. And since this is *my* Mary-Sue what I say goes.”

Inuyasha grinned and before she could move, had placed a quick yet nice kiss on Jaden's lips before grabbing Ranma's hand and pulling him towards the well house. "Thanks Mary Sue, and so long Kagome. I'll tell Koga you're looking for him," he shouted before turning his attention to Ranma, already talking about the Warring States time and what it was like.

Kagome only stared at the woman in shock. How could she do that, take Inuyasha from her? Inuyasha was Kagome's to command and bring to heel and only hers.

Jaden lifted a hand to her lips, “Damn! Note to self: See if I can come back to this one and track that boy down for some serious fun.” She glanced towards the stunned Kagome. “You don’t know what you and psycho bitch are missing.”

Kagome glared at the woman. "How dare you?!?" she screeched. "How am I suppose to get the rest of the Shards back without the mutt's help??"

“Would you like a like bread and cheese to go with that whine? You’ve got another mutt you can use, though I’m not sure I should be wishing you Koga either. Go ask him to help,” Jaden retorted as she started to turn and walk away.

Before Kagome could start whining or screaming again, Jaden found herself on what looked like a dirt road with a village in the distance and two familiar figures walking towards it, trading stories of battles and past experiences.

She giggled and started trying to sneak up on the boys, not really expecting it to work but it was fun.

One of Inuyasha's ears twitched in her direction but he gave no outward sign that he knew that she was coming, but a sudden tension thrummed through Ranma. Just then a monk emerged from the village and hurried towards them, his eyes firmly fixed on Jaden.

Jaden sighed and gave up on the sneaking, “Blasted monk. Ruin all my fun.” She grouched as she skipped up behind the two fighters and tossed an arm over each shoulder. “Hey, boys. Guess what? The PTBs decided I get to follow you around for awhile.”

Ranma instantly relaxed and flashed a bright grin at her. "That's great!" he exclaimed before catching sight of the monk. "Who's that and is he dangerous?"

Inuyasha snorted. "Only if you're female and not even then is Miroku dangerous."

“Translation: He’s Kuno but with more charm. Smarmy though it is. Basically he’ll just try to feel up any girl over the age of puberty and ask her to have his baby.” Jaden stated as she tried to keep an eye on both hands of said monk.

As if to prove Inuyasha's point, Miroku grasped one of Jaden’s hands, pulling it off Inuyasha's shoulder and knelt before her. "Dear lady whose beauty could rival that of the sun, would you do me the honor of bearing my son?"

Jaden sighed and glanced at Ranma, “See what I mean? No I won’t. I don’t feel like being pregnant at the moment thank you.”

Miroku sighed and stood up. "At this rate, I'll be dead and won't have *anyone* to get rid of this curse." he muttered starting back to the village.

Jaden giggled, “You know, if he’d quit flirting and groping everything with female parts in sight he could probably convince Songo to settle down with him.”

Inuyasha smirked. "Yeah, Sango'd probably settle with him as much as she could," he agreed before raising his arm in greeting. "Hey Old Woman!"

An old woman in priestess robes had emerged from her cottage and seemed to glare at Inuyasha with a flicker of surprise. "Ye are back an' without Kagome, Inuyasha."

Jaden hurried up to the group pulling Ranma behind her, “That’s my fault. I got sick of her whining and trying to get Inuyasha here killed so I broke the rosary and gave him a new toy instead. This is Ranma, he’ll be traveling with Inuyasha from now on.”

Kaeda examined the trio closely before fixing her one eye on Inuyasha. "The Shards? Naraku? Your brother?"

Inuyasha sighed, sounding impatient. "Look, I already said I was going to keep looking for the shards, but any I found I'd turn over to you and not her," he spat the word like a curse. "Naraku's head's mine as soon as I get my hands on him, and Sesshoumaru's only after me."

“So you see? It’s all good. Ranma is a strong fighter and has infinitely more sense than Kagome about running into situations before scouting them,” Jaden chirped happily as she looked around for the little fox demon so she could cuddle him.

"Inuyasha? Where's Kagome?" called a young voice as a small fox demon fell out of a tree on Inuyasha's head.

Inuyasha growled and reached up to pull Shippo off his head. "Kagome's sulking in her own time because she didn't like what I told her," replied Inuyasha with a small smile. "Besides I found someone who's willing to listen to me instead of charge in blindly."

Shippo looked over at Ranma and Jaden with curious yet wary eyes. "Who're they?" he asked before fixing Inuyasha with a scowl. "And why'd you fight with Kagome again? You two are always fighting."

“Hey kiddo. Name’s Jaden and this is Ranma. He’ll be traveling with Inuyasha from now on. As for Kagome, I know she was nice to you but she was down right evil to Inuyasha so I got in the middle of their fight, told her off since she was in the wrong and things went from there.” Jaden answered for the hanyou as she held out a hand to shake.

Shippo studied her for a moment before jumping into her arms. "You’re nice like Kagome," he greeted. “Smell nice like her too.”

“Oooo. You’re just sooo cuddly. Just don’t turn into a horn dog like the monk or Kurama and you’ll make someone very happy one day,” Jaden cooed as she gentle squeezed the little kitsune to herself, half turning so that Ranma could pet the tail.

Ramna gazed at the fuzzy tail waving in delight before glancing back at Inuyasha. "Is he always like that? I mean, the monks a letch, but this kid's got cuteness on his side."

Jaden nearly fell over laughing when she heard that, “As for as I know this body’s physically to young to do anything like that so I’m not worried. ‘Sides how else is he going to learn what these things are and what they’re used for?”

Inuyasha snorted. "As long as Shippo hangs around Miroku, he's gonna pick up the monk's bad habits. Hopefully Sango will get them trained out of him."

Jaden held Shippo out away from herself a bit, “You’ve seen the rotten luck Miroku has had trying to get a girl to settle down with him right? If you start acting like that you’ll never find a mate or have kits of your own. Do you want that?”

"I've been looking for you, dear brother," remarked a cold voice as Sesshoumaru stepped out of the tree line, his cold eyes focused entirely on Inuyasha.

Jaden just sighed and turned to face the demon, “Do you mind? I’m trying to have a meaning of life discussion with the kid here.”

Growling, Inuyasha stepped between the rest of the people and his brother, one hand going to the beat up sword at his waist. "Sesshoumaru," he growled. "Coming all the way to a human village to get the Tetsusaiga from me? Damn, you must be desperate."

Jaden snorted softly, “More like both his hands told him they were tired and to quit rubbing himself raw in a very delicate spot.”

Ranma and Miroku snickered at that while cold amber eyes turned on Jaden before dismissing her as unimportant. "I will kill you and claim Father's legacy for myself after slaughtering this village if you don't hand the Tetsusaiga over now."

Jaden stepped closer to the arguing pair, “No. You’re going to be a good puppy and go away before I start looking for a rolled up scroll to swat you over the nose with.”

Sesshoumaru glared down his nose at Jaden. "Who do you think you are to talk to me in such a manner, human? Do you value your life that poorly?"

“Nope. I just know that you can’t touch me cause this is my Mary-Sue which makes me God or in this case Goddess. As for my name it’s Jaden. Not so pleased to meet cha.” She retorted as she carefully set Shippo on the ground and got out of Inuyasha’s way.

Inuyasha snickered. "I'd be careful, dear brother," he sneered. "She even got Kagome to back down and that's not an easy task."

Jaden just shrugged, “That’s because I’ve had more practice playing Queen Bitch Goddess of the Universe than she has. Add to the fact that I know a figment of someone’s imagination can’t actually hurt me and there ya go.”

Sesshoumaru sniffed and dismissed Jaden with a toss of his head before returning his attention to Inuyasha. "You wish to see this village destroyed that badly?"

Jaden glared then leaned down to Shippo, “Be a sweetie and go get me a scroll, please?”

Nodding, Shippo ran off into Kaeda's hut to emerge a few seconds later with a blank scroll, handing it to Jaden with huge eyes. "It's a blank one, Kaeda," he explained, hiding behind the old woman's robes.

Jaden turned back to the brothers, “Last chance dog boy. You goin’ away or what?”

Inuyasha glanced at Jaden and bit back a grin but didn't move from his defensive position. He couldn't back down from his brother and be seen as even weaker than he already was in Sesshoumaru's eyes. It hurt sometimes to know that his only family hated him just because of who his mom was, but then Sesshoumaru would pull something like this or just open his arrogant mouth and Inuyasha was reminded why he never bothered any more to make friends with his brother. "I'd do what she says, Sesshoumaru. If not, it's your funeral."

Sesshoumaro snorted. "As if some human could overpower me."

Jaden shrugged, “Alright. You asked for it.” She drew back and brought the scroll down as hard as she could right across Sesshoumaru nose. “Bad Doggy!! Bad!! Bad!! Bad!!!” Each bad accompanied by another swing of the scroll.

Unable to restrain his laughter any longer, Inuyasha rolled on the ground with Miroku, their laughter drawing out Sango and Kilala who stared at everyone as if they had gone insane. Sesshoumaru was surprised by the first swing but managed to snap out of his shock by the third and managed to block her swings from his face with his arms.

Jaden finally quit swinging when her arm started to tire, “Now then. Are you going to go away or do I get to play Kagome to your Inuyasha?”
Sesshoumaru glared at her, his eyes promising a painful and lingering death. "Who are you to order me around? Another one of the half-breeds women?" he growled.

“Hell no. I’m not that lucky. Course if you’d go away I could try to fix that. I told you who I was, not my fault you don’t know what Mary-Sue means. Hey, Kaede, you have any more of those rosaries? I was thinkin’ putting it on him with Inuyasha having the command word power over it.” Jaden calmly stated as she stared right back into those amber eyes. “Or oh oh I know, that little girl Rin or the frog lookin’ dude have the command word but Inuyasha’s the only one who can take it off him and we don’t tell them what the word is, so they have to figure it for themselves.”

Kaeda smirks and pulled out another set of beads from her robes. "Aye, I have another strand, in case I was lucky enough to get them around Naraku's neck," she remarked before softly chanting under her breath. The beads glowed and shot out to encircle Sesshoumaru's neck, causing him to yelp in surprise.

Jaden cackled, “Damn we’re evil! I love it! Now a word, a word……” she muttered as she tried to think of something very innocent but everyday enough to get used where the largest amount of people would see it work the first time.

Inuyasha was practically vibrating as he stared at her with a maniacal grin on his face where he was crouched on the ground. "Too bad we can't just use Kagome's favorite word."

Jaden nodded, “Yeah but they know that one and will recognize the rosary the instant they see it so would avoid that word like the plague. Oh! I’ve got it,” she leaned down and whispered what she had thought up then straightened. “Think it’d work?”

Inuyasha started cackling again, holding his ribs as he rolled on the ground.

Jaden watched him with a fond smile, “I think he likes it. Okay so who sets this things, I’ve forgotten?”

Kaeda smiled and stepped forward. "Usually the first person with power in their voice to speak can command the Binding Spell, and the first word they speak will be the word of power," she smirked at Sesshoumaru. "Perhaps if ye apologize to the villagers for threatening them and to Inuyasha for using them against him, I will remove it for ye."

Jaden snorted rudely, “Cha yeah like that’ll happen. Course he is free to come back any time and sincerely and politely apologize.”

Just then, a small girl stepped out of the bushes, looking around before a smile lights up her face. "Lord Sesshoumaru!" she cried in a bright voice as she hurried over to him.

“Ahh, fuc… fudge it’s Rin. I forgot she actually likes the S.O.B. Okay so we set it to frog boy’s voice and go from there. That way she doesn’t feel bad about hurting him.” Jaden quickly reordered her plan as she watched the interaction between the demon and the little girl.

Sesshoumaru's form had tensed when he had heard Rin's voice but relaxed when nothing happened only to hear the familiar screech of Jakken. "Lord Sesshoumaru! Lord!"

*WHAM!* He was pulled face first to the ground, causing Rin to squeak in fear and Inuyasha started howling with laughter now.

Jaden collapsed down beside Inuyasha giggling madly herself as she watched the baka demon try to talk through the dirt. “Rin, sweetie, it’s okay. It doesn’t really hurt him and will hopefully teach him some manners. See he wasn’t very nice earlier and he needs to learn that he isn’t immune to his actions.” She explained to the distraught little girl after she had calmed down and made herself comfortable, leaning back on Inuyasha’s chest.

“Did your mommy or daddy punish you when you were bad? Maybe spank you if you did something really dangerous that you knew you weren’t supposed to do?” She continued.

Rin frowned. "But Lord Sesshoumaru's a demon ruler. He can't be nice or other demons will see that as a weakness and kill him," she explained in a factual voice.

“But that doesn’t mean he has to be mean to humans or people who aren’t bothering him. That just makes him a bully.”

"oh" that one word summed up the little girl's feelings as she sat down right there to think about what the nice lady had said.

“Tell you what. If you want I can retune the rosary around his neck so that you can use it too. That way whenever you think he’s being a bully you can use it to send him to a corner, okay?” Jaden asked gently as she smoothed down some of the girl’s hair.

Rin nodded, her small face determined. "I would like to have the power," she stated, her dark eyes going to Sesshoumaru who was standing on his feet once more. "Rulers are nice, Bullies aren't."

“Okay. Done. Now, whenever Frog Boy over there says what he did you’ll be eating dirt and whenever Rin says it you’ll go to a corner or a spot away from what you were doing and stay there until it wears off so you can think about whatever mean thing you where doing,” Jaden stated as the rosary flashed again, showing it had excepted the new orders. “Also now the only way Rin can die is by natural causes such as being sick or old age or if she asks and means it.”

A flash of fear crossed Sesshoumaru's face for a second before his haughty _expression was back. "Do you honestly think you can collar me?" he demanded.

Inuyasha snorted. "Why not? They were able to collar me for a good long time," he retorted before smirking. "Welcome to my life, brother."

“And what are you whining for? I just made sure that your girl there isn’t going to get used as bait by other demons,” Jaden snarked as she huffily crossed her arms over her chest.

Rin hesitantly reached up and placed a hand on his arm, as if afraid of what her touch might do. "It is a good deal, sir," she stated, her voice clear and firm in her beliefs.

“See. Even Little Bit there agrees with me,” Jaden insisted stopping just short of sticking out her tongue. She knew better in Mary-Sues.

For a few minutes, Sesshoumaru was silent before glancing at Jaken. "Can you remove his command from the collar?" he asked, not removing his eyes from the little toad-like demon. "I do not mind Rin for she will not abuse it. Jaken will take far too much delight in holding some power over me."

“I don’t know. You going to continue being a complete something I shouldn’t say in front of small children or did that one face plant truly get your attention?” Jaden countered.

"It got my attention." The four words were dropped in the air with enough frost on them to lower the temperature for several degrees.

Jaden turned to the little girl, “What do you think? Should we take the other command completely off or just change the word and give it to you?”

Rin thought for a few minutes. "Change the word and give it to me, because sir does like to tease Jaken a lot, and Jaken could accidentally hurt sir a lot," she replied, sounding completely grown up.

“Done. And you get to pick the word. Oh, and Sesshoumaru, that protection I did on Rin also keeps you from accidentally on purpose killing her in a temper tantrum,” Jaden informed the still very pissed demon.

Rin looked up, shyly, at the older woman. "Any word?" she whispered.

Jaden nodded, “Any word that you’re old enough to say. Can’t have you cussing cause that’d bring evil spirits known as Censors down on my head and I can’t fight worth a lick.” She said with a smile and a wink.

Rin giggled and thought for a few more seconds before whispering 'bully' into Jaden's ear.

Jaden cackled, “Ohhh. I like you, hon! That’s perfect. Say it first to get his attention then the other one to make him go think about what he was doing. Man! You’re almost a devious as I am.”

Rin frowned and tugged on Jaden's sleeve to get her to crouch down. "Could you change the other word to corner 'cause I don't know what Jaken said," she whispered.

“Sure. Though the word was “Lord”. A bit mean I know but you have to admit he’s been asking for something like this with the way he’s been acting lately,” Jaden nodded as the beads glowed once again. “Do you want me to change the color while we’re at it so that the aren’t as noticeable?”

Rin nodded. "Yes please," she agreed. "It would be mean to make him wear them as boldly as Lord Inuyasha did because he still has to maintain control over others."

“You want them silver or white?” Jaden queried as she and the little girl both turned to study the tall demon together.

"White would blend in better," remarked Rin who squeaked when the dark beads suddenly changed to white and seemed to vanish beneath the pale kimono.

“There ya go. Now go pet him for being a good doggy and see if you can get him to go play. Truthfully I think that’s why he’s such a sour puss,” Jaden whispered into Rin ear with an evilly gleeful grin.

Rin giggled and skipped back to Sesshoumaru's side. "Come, Lord Sesshoumaru sir," she called, laughter coloring her voice. "Come play!"

“Yeah. Go play,” Jaden goaded with a shooing motion of her hands at the Lord of the Western Lands.

Sesshoumaru spared one last glare and the parting comment of "We're not done yet, dear brother" before he was dragged off to play by the human child.

“Rin remind him that trying to take his brother’s sword away from him is mean please?” Jaden called out to the girl before she got completely out of ear shot.

Giggles were Jaden's only answer, and Inuyasha shook his head. "Just seeing that makes me realize just how far he's come," he remarked, brushing the dust off of his red fire rat clothes. "There was a time when Sesshoumaru wouldn't have hesitated to kill her. Instead he brings her back from the dead."

“Hence the reason I let her dictate the conditions of the rosary. She’s the human that has to put up with him the most and at that age right and wrong are very clearly defined,” Jaden explained as she watched Rin try to interest one of the most dangerous demons in the world to play tag.

Sango had a thoughtful look on her face as she approached them, Kilala purring in her arms. "He does act different," she mused. "I don't think we would have been able to stop him had he decided to start killing everyone here, but that little girl did."

Kaeda nodded. "Aye, child," she agreed with a small smile. "That is the power of a child's love."

Jaden nodded as she reached over to let Kilala sniff her hand, she really wanted to pet the little creature, “I noticed that in the series. She’s one of if not the only being that could stop him. And this way she can’t be hurt by him if he ever goes into one of his rages around her. I know he wouldn’t mean to hurt or kill her but that doesn’t mean he couldn’t and regret it later.”

Kilala delicately sniffed the hand before bumping her head against it, impatient for scratches. "Yeah, who knew my bastard of a brother actually had a heart," mused Inuyasha before his tone turned bitter. "Never showed it to me though."

Jaden shrugged as she busily scratched wherever the little firecat wanted, “Typical sibling rivalry is what that was. Your mother replaced his and then your father’s attention was split between your mom and him and the later on he died protecting her and you. So in his eyes you not only made his mother leave but also got his father killed. That’s *if* I’m remembering the series correctly in that your mom was actually Dad’s mistress first, then became second wife or something.”

"Still don't like it though," muttered Inuyasha with a frown.

Jaden leaned over and gave him a peck in the cheek and a quick ear rub, “Don’t have to. It’s just the way it is. Maybe once Rin’s old enough and if she likes him like that he can start getting laid regularly enough to start acting decent. Enough sex can mellow anyone I’m told.”

A blush stole over Inuyasha's cheeks and he quickly looked away, right at Ranma who was blushing as well.

“So. What’s next on the whirligig of fun, campers?” Jaden chirped as she clapped her hands together, completely ignoring the two blushing boys.

{YOU ASKED FOR IT.}

“SHIT!!” Jaden yelped startled by the boom.

Suddenly, Jaden was standing in the stone halls of a great castle. Paintings were scattered along the walls with tapestries and the occasional suit of armor, but no one was around.

“Oh, fuck! I better not be where I think I am.” Jaden cussed as she looked closer at one of the paintings to see if it moved.

The bird suddenly took off, flying out of the frame just as a smooth cultured voice floated through the air from behind her. "My, what a pretty one to be wandering the castle all alone."

Jaden jumped and spun, landing in a defensive stance, “Lesson the first, bud, *never* sneak up on me. I turn mean real quick.”

Draco Malfoy smirked as he sauntered over, oozing sex appeal. "But you are lovely when you are startled, dear one," he purred.

Jaden quickly backed up and sighed, “Ah well. The rest was nice while it lasted. Rabbiting stage left yet again.”

Draco pulled his wand. "Not yet, precious," he purred, raising his arm to cast a spell.

“Draco Malfoy you try spelling me in the back and I’ll shove that wand somewhere you really don’t want it!!” Jaden shouted over her shoulder as she started zigzagging her way across the floor.

"You can't run from me, precious!" he called, following after her. "I enjoy the hunt too much to loose you to Precious Potter or his brats."

“I doubt Harry or his crew could handle me. But then again I don’t think you can either so you’re about even,” Jaden snarked as she tried for the outer doors.

Draco shouted out a spell and the open door slammed in her face, preventing her from escaping outside. "I know Potter and his brats couldn't handle you," he replied, not sounding winded in the least.

Jaden just growled at her exit being cut off and spun to face the brat, “Okay Draco. Here’s the deal, I think you’re a pest who desperately needs to be turned over someone’s knee and spanked until you learn decent manners. And no I’m not volunteering. So lets just say you saw me, gave chase like the good little Slytherin you are, and I got away. K? K.”

Draco chuckled, a rich seductive sound. "Ah, but if I didn't try my best to catch you, then I would be letting down not only my house but my family as well."

Jaden snorted, “Your family comes anywhere near me and you’re going to be sort a sperm donor, you catch what I’m saying. If you were my fanon Draco I could at least feel safe enough to give you a kiss on the cheek then I could hand you over to Harry happily but since you’re not…….. Yo PTBs an exit if you please?”

{YOU DID ASK...}

“Ahh shit! What did I tell myself earlier? Don’t leave that big an opening,” Jaden bitched as she braced herself for whatever.

Smirking, Draco sauntered up and placed a hand on each side of her head, trapping her against the door. Before he could say anything, the door opened inward, sending both of them tumbling back with Draco crashing down on top of Jaden.

"Well this is a new position for you, Malfoy," drawled Harry Potter, smirking down at them. "At least in the middle of the hall."

Jaden giggled then saucily offered, “You wanna take my spot? The stone’s all nice and warm now and I’m *sure* Dracipoo won’t mind.”

Harry chuckled and brutally shoved Draco off her, holding out his hand to help her up. "Sorry not my type," he replied with a shy smile. "Too male."

Jaden shrugged, “Oh well. I’ll probably work a little slash action in somewhere on this trip.” She leaned in and pecked him on the lips. “Thanks for the rescue by the way.”

Harry blushed and ducked his head. Even Neville and Ron snickered as the Slytherin Prince picked himself up off the floor and brushed his robe out with angry swipes of his hand. "If it's slash you're after, I'm sure Potter would be willing to spread his legs for someone," he sneered, glaring daggers at the Griffindors.

Jaden whirled on Draco, “Boy! Don’t piss me off by insulting people! It’s a good way to get yourself written into a never sees daylight rape fic. And you wonder why you didn’t get anywhere with me and Harry’s already gotten a kiss. HE is a gentleman in the true sense of the word. Something this world is sorely lacking.”

Draco snorted and folded his arms. "No, he uses that shy little boy act and it gets him whatever he wants," drawled Draco. "And you're a Mary-Sue! I'm suppose to stalk you and try to tumble you into bed before you slip through my fingers just before I succeed."

“True. But that doesn’t mean I have to put up with you being an insufferable prat while I’m here. Horn dog routine no problem. Royal raving jackass on the other hand……,” Jaden conceded as she slightly cuddled back into Harry, just to see what he’d do.

Instantly Harry’s arms wound around her waist, pulling her back against him and letting her know that he was *very* interested in her.

“Keep the wandering hands PG-13 rated and we’ll talk about it later,” she purred loud enough for everyone to hear as she wiggled a bit to get comfortable.

"I'll hold you to that,” Harry purred in her ear, firmly keeping his hands at her waist.

Jaden shivered, “Are you still hung up on Cho when I’m not here?”

Harry snorted. "She's dating Oliver Wood," he purred. "A passing fancy of mine, I assure you."

“And no one else has snatched you up? What the hell is wrong with the female population of this school? Is there like something in the pumpkin juice that kills the sex drive or are they just stupidly blind?” Jaden questioned, pitching her voice so that it echoed in ever corner of the Hall.

Harry snorted. "No, they all want the Boy Who Lived and not Harry Potter with all his human problems and neurosis," he drawled.

“Ahhh. Yeah that would do it. Stupidly blind it is then. Girls quick lesson, you get one like this so you can fix problems and get great cuddles and sex at the same time. Besides if none of you have taken him up to train him than *Ohmygod* is he a natural,” Jaden informed as she turned and nuzzled just under Harry’s jawline a bit.

Smirking, Harry tightened his grip on her waist. "I thought you wanted to keep this PG-13? Change your mind already?" he teased.

“Oh, Honey, this wouldn’t even raise the eyebrow of a prime time tv Censor. Trust me, we’re still PG-13. Besides it’s winding Dracie up like nobody’s business,” Jaden giggled as she cut her eyes to Draco.

Harry chuckled and watched as the platinum blonde’s face took on an interesting color of red. "That it is indeed," he purred before leaning down to claim her lips in a chaste kiss.

“Ummmm,” Jaden purred as she tried to decide whither she wanted to deepen it or not.

Just then, hands ripped her away as a new body grabbed Harry and Draco glared into Harry's eyes. "You're mine, Potter!" hissed the Slytherin prince before placing a claiming lip lock on the shocked Griffindor.

Jaden just stood there for a second watching before she fell to the floor cackling like an entire pack of Hyenas.

Harry finally pulled back and smirked at Draco. "Took you long enough, Dragon," he muttered before he was the one doing the claiming.

“Oww! Floor hard. Oh God! *snicker* That was perfect! Oh thank you PTBs for that one!!!!” Jaden managed to get out between cackles, still holding her sides and rolling around on the floor.

Just then she noticed that the floor had turned into soft grass.

Jaden sobered up slowly, “Oh great. Now, what?” She asked herself as she laid there and stared up at the sky.

"A true beauty that I have not seen in over 5000 years," murmured a voice as a figure clad in leather and buckles held out a hand to help her up. "I certainly hope you will share what you find amusing, lovely one, so I might bask in the musical sound of your laughter again."

Jaden cast a quick glance towards the tri-colored hair and chirped, “Hi Yami. A pair of characters back in the last fandom decided to get together because one of them finally decided that they didn’t want to share and staked his claim good and proper. They were still snogging when I left. So what’s up?”

Yami chuckled as he pulled her to her feet, an arm around her waist as she steadied herself. "Just the usual. Tea trying to find any excuse to show her affections for me, Tristian and Joey are making out in the bushes, and Seto's declaring for all to know that he's going to defeat me while battling the UST he feels for me," he drawled.

“Ahh. S.O.P then. When are you going to just tie that boy down and do fun and interesting things to him until he can’t remember why he didn’t like them?” Jaden suggested as they started wandering around what turned out to be a park.

The shadowy form of Yugi appeared next to Yami. "We keep trying but then a Duel shows up or some idiot tries to take over Kaiba Corp and we gotta postpone it until later," he sighed, cradling his head in his hand. "Even Mokuba's getting tired of the way Seto's snapping at everyone."

Jaden grinned a grin so evil it would have made Bakura step back, “Want some help? I did so well in the last fandom I’m willing to try my matchmaking skills here.”

Yami smirked. "Let's get Mokuba in on this," he said. "I've got a plan but it will require at least two people to keep Seto occupied until I'm done."

“No prob. Where’s he at?” Jaden asked with a shrug and snicker.

Yami looked around but it was Yugi who spotted the laughing teen tossing a Frisbee with his older brother who didn't look quite so severe.

Yugi pointed to Mokuba. "There he is, but how to get him away from Seto..."

“Well, I could play distraction. See if the Mary-Sue thing is working here or not,” Jaden suggested quietly as all three sized up the situation.

Yami held out a cell phone. "Here, take this and when I text you with the all clear, you can leave 'em alone," he remarked with a smirk. "We'll get everything ready for Seto at his place."

“K, Boss. Wish me luck.” She chirped as she took the phone and headed towards the pair.
"Luck," chorused the boys before the shadows swallowed them.

“Man that’s a neat trick. Damn! Forgot to see if I have a deck here or not,” Jaden muttered as she slid a hand down her hip at just the same moment Mokuba spotted her.

Mokuba grinned and skipped over to her, picking up the Frisbee that had landed a few feet away. "Hi! Wanna play with my brother and me?" he chirped, holding up the disk of red plastic before tilting his head and studying her. "After all, Yami wouldn't have given you that necklace if you weren't a friend of his." He pointed to a small golden chain that had a Horus Eye pendant dangling from it.

“Sure.” Jaden replied just as sunnily. As he ran back over to his spot she muttered darkly, “Necklace what necklace? That sneaky little so and so. When did he get this on me?”

{YOU BLINKED}

Jaden snorted and replied very softly, “No shit.” She moved into the spot Mokuba pointed to and got ready to spend the next however long playing catch.

Mokuba tossed the disk wide and far, forcing his brother to race after it before quietly approaching Jaden. "What are Yami and Yugi up to?" he asked before smirking. "And should I find someplace else to spend the night?"

“If everything goes according to plan then yeah suddenly remembering an invite to a sleepover tonight would be an excellent idea. Right now they’re over at your place setting things up. I’m supposed to be a distraction until they text me,” Jaden answered with a smirk of her own.

Mokuba let loose an evil cackle. "I hope they remember to disconnect all the phones and steal 'Niisan's pager and phone before they double team him," he chortled before running to catch the Frisbee that his brother had tossed back.

“Umm, so do I actually.” Jaden caught Mokuba’s eye and signaled to keep Seto busy while she texted that to the boys.

A simple "k" was texted back before Seto wandered over her direction, causing her to hastily stuff the phone away. "I trust that you are assisting the pharaoh and his shadow with something because if you are here to harm us, I assure you that you are wasting your time.”

“Did you know you’re kinda cute when you’re all threatening and stuff?” Jaden quipped with a smirk as she started playing with her necklace.

Seto snorted. "I also have at least three dragons at my disposal," he drawled, catching the Frisbee and returning it with a flick of his wrist and a smile for his brother.

“And your point is? I’m not worried about your Blues Eyes truthfully. You wouldn’t allow anything to upset Mokuba and having a new friend of his eaten because you’re paranoid would definitely upset him,” Jaden retorted with a casual shrug as she too caught a toss and sent it back.

Seto snorted. "Paranoia is what has kept us both alive for so long," he murmured before shaking his head. "Very well. I will assume that your presence is benign and if you prove me wrong, you will regret it." With that, he moved out a bit until they were in a rough triangle.

“Whatever floats your boat, Hun.” Jaden snarked under her breath as she threw a reassuring wink at Mokuba.

Mokuba giggled and they continued tossing the disk back and forth until the phone buzzed in her pocket.

“Mike’s Morgue. You stab ‘em. We slab ‘em. Special discount for repeat costumers. How my I direct your call?” Jaden rattled off as she pulled it out and read the 'all clear' that was on the screen.

Mokuba glanced up at his brother who yelped and vanished in a swirl of shadows and giggled. "Looks like Yami finally made his move."

“Yep. Hey, Mokuba, weren’t you telling me about a slumber party you were supposed to be heading to soon? Need an escort?” Jaden asked with an evil grin as she put the phone back up.

Mokuba giggled. "Okay," he chirped, reaching out to grab her hand. "We'll go to Solomon's shop. he doesn't mind it when I stay there with him."

“That’s probably because you coo at his cards as much as he does,” Jaden teased as she swung their joined hands back and forth in time to their pace.

Mokuba giggled and glanced up at her with a shy smile. "But most of them are so *pretty*," he sighed. "Is it wrong of me to wish the Elf Maiden was a real person instead of a picture on a card?"

“No. It shows you have good taste and an open mind. ‘Sides there are a couple of the guys in those cards that I wouldn’t mind being real,” Jaden reassured with playful leer and a wink.

Cackling, they continued to the shop only to find Bakura lounging just inside the door when they arrived.

“Oh, merde.” Jaden muttered as her eyes adjusted and she spotted him. “I love being able to cuss in other languages.”

Bakura smirked. "I could teach you a few interesting words that I doubt the Pharaoh knows," he purred, amber eyes flashing under his wild white hair. "Unless the Pharaoh is in the habit of spending his days in the darkest parts of his cities."

“Thanks but no thanks. I’m happy being able to cuss in French, Japanese and Mong. What are you doing here anyway? I thought you and Kingy weren’t very friendly?” Jaden babbled as she kept one eye on Mokuba and tried to slid back out the door. “Bye kiddo.”

Bakura snorted. "We're slowly growing over our differences," he drawled, returning his attention to the small television that was sitting on one of the shelves. "When I finally get my revenge, it won't be a knife in the back in the dark."

“Well at least you’ve come to your senses that much. I wish you much luck in your enterprises,” Jaden continued to babble as she edged a little bit more out the door.

"Do you honestly think I'm going to kill you or feed you to one of my fiends?" he drawled. "Besides if you leave now, you'll miss the best part."

“Actually as surprising as this sounds I’m not afraid of you like that. I’m not afraid of you at all truthfully, it’s just I’m a Mary-Sue and I don’t know if this fandom’s another one of my rest stops or if you’re suddenly going to decide that I’m female and act like a normal character for one of this things. And what best part? What are you watching?” Jaden explained as she stopped and tried to see what was on the tv.

The image was of a room decorated in Ancient Egyptian and a swirl of purple shadows deposited a furious Seto in the middle of the thick, sandy carpet. "Yugi Mouto! What the *hell* do you think you are doing?" he snarled, one hand dropping to his waist just as Yugi and Yami both appeared, neither one the shadowy form of a spirit. Both were dressed in linen and gold, looking every inch the pharaoh of Egypt.

Bakura snickered and nudged her. "See? This is the best part," he muttered.

Yami smirked as Yugi approached Seto on silent feet. "We are tired of the interruptions that keep you from us," the pharaoh stated as Yugi managed to get Seto's coat off before worming his way into Seto's arms, looking very at home there as Yami wrapped his arms around both of them, hugging Seto between the apparent twins.

“Oh Lord. Ancient Egyptian porno. This ought to be interesting,” Jaden giggled as she watched the screen, leaning against Bakura’s shoulder to be more comfortable.

Yugi stretched up slightly and caught Seto's mouth in a gentle kiss, startling the other teen enough that Yami and Yugi were able to remove some more of his clothes, tossing the shirt and bracers off to one side to land in a pile while the deck of cards was carefully placed next to their own on a cloth covered table.

“Now that was very smoothly done. I’m proud of them,” Jaden commented.

Just as Yugi's hands fell to the waist of Seto's pants, the screen suddenly was filled with static.

“Damn! Come on man!!! That’s a down right evil thing to do to a slash writer,” Jaden whined as she reached over to thump the set a couple of time on the side.

Instead of focusing back in, the screen went dead and Bakura snickered.

“Stupid, evil TV. And what are you snickering at, Whitey?” Jaden growled with a glare for both the tv and Bakura.

"The fact that you want to keep the rating down otherwise we'd both be enjoying a bit of voyeurism about now," he remarked, the golden ring on his chest glinting in the store light.

“Rats. You’re right. Why did I want to keep the rating down again?” Jaden asked rhetorically. “Screw it! Hey, guys upstairs! We’re upping the rating to Scribe level.”

A small puff of smoke and a DVD case was sitting on the counter with "For Your Eyes Only NC-17" scrawled on the front cover.

Jaden cackled and moved so fast Bakura wasn’t even sure he saw her move, “Mine!! Mine!! All mine and you can’t have any unless you ask really nicely!” She crowed as she danced around the store, holding onto the DVD tightly.

Bakura smiled a devilishly charming smile. "How nice do I have to ask?" he purred, raising his arms above his head and crossing his wrists. "With whips and chains?"

Jaden stumbled as her brain went down a sewer track she didn’t know she had, “Ack! Damn, hun, don’t do that to a girl when she’s dancin’.” She gulped and studied the pretty picture he made. “Though I do admit that’s an awfully pretty picture I’m seein’.” Jaden eyes glazed over as all higher brain functions gave up and just followed her train of thought farther down the sewer track.

Bakura stretched a bit more so that his tee shirt was riding up to expose his flat stomach, and his hips thrust out, his tight jeans emphasizing his muscular legs. "Perhaps not whips and chains, but definitely leather restraints.”

Jaden smirked as she laid the DVD down on a counter, “I agree with you, chains probably not, but I’ve been told I’m a natural with a soft whip,” she purred as she lightly raked her nails across the exposed skin just above the pants line.

Bakura shivered slightly and grinned, sharp teeth flashing. "Perhaps we should find better accommodations than the back of the shop," he purred. "The bastard of a father's in the Middle East somewhere this week. I think."

“Ahhh, but my darling Bakura, you’re forgetting one itty bitty little fact. I’m a Mary-Sue and it’s my job and in this case great pleasure to tease the hell out of you,” with the sound of the last word dying in the air, Jaden bolted out the door, snatching up her DVD on the fly. You could hear her cackling for blocks around.

Stumbling slightly, Jaden found herself on board a ship that appeared to be black with black sails flapping in the wind.

“Whoa!!! Sea legs are my friends! Where the he…….. The Pearl. I’m on the Pearl. Oh joy.” Jaden yelped as she got her legs under her and wished her DVD some place much safer.

"Anamarie, did you call fer extra help, luv?" slurred a deep voice from above her.

Jaden turned and spied the speaker on the wheel deck and snorted, “Cap’n Jack Sparrow. Well, at least it’s not Barossa.” Since her DVD was still there she shrugged and shoved it into a back pocket.

The DVD shrunk to the size of a credit card. Jack snorted and made his way, unsteadily, over to her, a jug in one hand. "Barbossa is quite dead,' he smirked. "Shot 'im meself an' took back me Pearl." He took a swig and held the jug out to her. "Rum?"

“No thanks, luv. Never could develop a taste for it. Now, Schnapps. That’s good stuff,” Jaden politely refused with a grin.

Jack shrugged. "Will never understand women," he muttered, taking another swig of the rum before leering at her. "Care ta see what I've done with the Pearl, luv?”

“Don’t know. How worried about my virtue should I be today, sailor?” Jaden quipped.

"Just slap him if he get's too personal!" shouted Ana maria.

Jaden fell against Jack as she cackled nearly sending both of them to the deck, “Thank ye for the permission.” She called back as she got herself under control.

An arm snaked around her waist, pulling her back against a muscular body that smelled of sun, salt and rum. "Easy, lass, dinna wanna find yerself fallin' overboard," he purred, the beads in his hair clacking with his movements. "Would be a waist of such charms."

Jaden gulped and tried to wiggle out of the embrace, “Okay. I’ll give you points for smoothness on that one. My own fool fault of getting this close to ya.”

Jack chuckled and escorted her towards his cabin. "I'll have ye know I'm a perfect gentlemen!" he declared loudly earning a snort of disbelief from Ana Maria.

Jaden reached over and patted his cheek and smirked, “It’s good that *you* believe that.” She snarked loud enough for everyone to hear.

That got a cackle from Ana Maria and an eyeroll from Jack. "No one believes me, even when I'm tryin' ta be honest," he sighed, escorting her through the doors of his cabin, releasing her only enough to close the doors behind them, sealing them into the opulent room that looked like a magpie resided there. Glittering objects were scattered around empty rum bottles, the plain dark wood almost covered by shimmering fabrics and jewels. The sun spilled through the window and added an almost blinding sparkle to the room as it bounced off of various objects.

“You know, you’re missing a pretty. And keep me away from the fabric my mother and I are both seamstresses and I’ll try to umm ‘borrow’ some if I find any I like,” Jaden informed as she started mentally deciding which fabrics and jewels she wanted.

Jack smirked and stepped back to run a critical eye over her before gathering up some jewels strung together. "But now that yer here, I'm not missin' a pretty any more," he replied, draping a strand of sapphires over her shoulders.

Jaden cooed at the jewels before she smirked back at him, “Ahhh, but you’re missin’ a Will. Can’t have Cap’n Jack Sparrow sailin’ around and makin’ mischief without his Will there beside him pretending he’s not having fun, now can ya?”

Jack cackled and added some emeralds to her hair. "He's down in th' ship's smithy gettin' all hot an' sweaty like he enjoys," he remarked, scooping up an armful of sapphire silk to drape around her in a parody of a Grecian toga. "An' later, I'll scrub his back an' we'll get all hot an' sweaty like we both enjoy." He leered at her. "Care ta join us, luv?”

Jaden’s eyes glazed over a bit as she thought about that tangle, then licked her lips, “Uhh, give me a bit to really think on that?”

Jack smirked. "Ye have until Will comes up fer his bath," he purred, slipping some jewel encrusted bangles on her arms.

Jaden blinked then really noticed everything that was being added to her person, “Is this some nefarious plan to weight me down with so many pretties I can’t run if I decide to not play?”

Jack blinked as a thoughtful look came over his face. "Now there's an idea," he muttered before shaking his head. "Must ask Will if he can work in gold an' jewels as well as iron."

“I know he can work gold cause he did some detail work on Commodore Nitwit’s last sword before you guys met. I can work beads and holed jewels so between the two of us we could probably come up with something. Why?” Jaden asked as she started adjusting things, trying to get it to where she could still run if necessary.

"Just imaginin' how th' two of you would look in me bed, chained there with jeweled manacles that were more decoration than anythin'," Jack absently replied, running a critical eye over her before scooping her up and depositing her on his overstuffed matress. "There, a true beauty in me bed."

Jaden laid there and gaped at him a moment before thumping her head back on the pillow a couple of times, “Bad imagination! Bad! Bad! Bad! Thanks for the compliment by the way.”

"Now what's so bad about yer imagination?" purred Jack sitting next to her on the bed and running a gentle hand up her arm. "I rather like th' picture meself."

Jaden snorted, “So do I. That’s the issue. I’m a Mary-Sue and as such must hold to the Mary-Sue Code which states that a Mary-Sue may not give into a character until she has met at least one character out of every fandom she is going to be in at least once. So you see my problem?”

Jack frowned. "So I've got ta be put on a waitin' list then?" he pouted.

“Oh I didn’t say we couldn’t play. We just can’t do anything truly serious. And if I’m running under the Scribe Version of the Mary-Sue Code then there’s nothing that says you can’t come visit once I’m back in my reality.” Jaden tried to comfort.

Jack smirked. "So how long do I have ye?"

Jaden shrugged, “Haven’t a clue, that’s up to the PTBs. They’re the folks moving me from fandom to fandom. Though if they know what’s good for them they’ll leave me here until I get to talk to Will for a bit. I wanna see how badly I can make him blush.” She said with an evil little smirk.

Jack cocked his head slightly as the sound of approaching footsteps outside the cabin. "Looks like yer gonna get yer wish,luv," he drawled as the door opened to admit a sweaty and grimy Will Turner. "Will me boy! Come see th' angel that fell from th' sky!"

Jaden just giggled at the comment and chirped, “Hiya, Handsome. How’s it hangin’?”

Jack smirked. "With him, a bit to th' left," he drawled, delighting in the faint blush that stained Will's cheeks under the grime.

Will sniffed and folded his arms. "If you will excuse me, I am hardly fit for such pleasant company."

“Awww, isn’t he just so *cute* when he’s being gentlemanly? You go bathe, you can even have Jack to help with your back,” Jaden cooed and paused a beat. “Or whatever else needs washing.”

Jack smirked at her. "Wanna help, luv?" he asked causing Will's blush to deepen. "I'm sure between th' two of us, we could get Will quite clean."

“Hum, help or not? Decisions, decisions. Sure why not? Just remember that if things get to involved you have to help each other,” Jaden purred as she started wiggling to get out of everything Jack had draped on her earlier.

Jack watched with growing interest as she removed the bauble and silk. "Gonna take anythin' else off, luv?" he purred before sauntering over to help fix Will's bath.

Jaden threw a smirk over her shoulder and teased, “Maaaybe. If I decide I’m in a nice mood. Or an evil one depending on how you look at it.”

Jack cackled and helped Will undress, even though Will was protesting about Jaden being in the room to watch him.

Jaden just shook her head at Will’s whining, “Jack, Jack, Jack. I thought you had corrupted the boy more than this by now? What happened?” She sighed as she reach over and patted Will on the butt to see what he’d do.

Will yelped as if he had been burned and jumped in the air, whirling around to glare at her, forgetting all about his nude state. "Madam, perhaps it is uncommon where you come from but I was raised to respect the gentle sex and that does not include them watching me bathe naked," he stated before suddenly whirling around, a bright red blush traveling down his back.

Jaden just fell back on the bed cackling, “Oh God I love 1700’s sensibilities!” She crowed as she hopped back up and gave Will a hug from the back. And her hands only wandered a little bit.

That caused another embarrassed yelp before Will managed to get free and tried to dunk himself in the small tub, but when his head went under the water, his legs and feet came up into the air. Jack leaned against a wall and chuckled as he watched the antics of his lover and beautiful prize.

Jaden waited until Will came back up before pouncing on a foot, “Hey, Jack? Is Will ticklish?”

jack smirked and grabbed the other foot, demonstrating as Will howled with laughter, desperately trying to get his foot back but unable to. "Just a touch, luv," he teased.

“GOODIE!!” She squealed as she attacked the foot she had. “I’ll quit if you quit being such a ninny about being proper. Deal?”

Will's howls of laughter echoed through the cabin until he was red faced and had tears streaming down his face.

Jaden paused for a moment to let the poor guy get some breath back, “Well? Do you surrender?”

"Yes, I'll try," gasped Will, sinking a bit farther in the slightly murky water, his arms around his ribs as he fought to get his breathing under control.

Jaden leaned in and gave him a peck on the lips, “Good boy. Now you can finish your bath while I look at some of the other pretties in here.”

Jack smirked and picked up a wash cloth, getting it wet and soapy. "I'm lookin' at th' two prettiest pretties in here," he purred, starting to wash Will off and enjoying the feel of the hard muscles under his hand.

Jaden sighed with a grin, “Ya gotta love a man who deliver lines like that naturally.”

Jack smirked and stripped off his shirt, revealing his own muscular if scarred chest. "Ye can hardly expect me ta lie can ye?"

After taking a moment to unstick her tongue from the roof of her mouth, Jaden tried to reply only to find she couldn’t think of anything to say. Instead she shook her head and started wandering around the cabin, picking up a pretty here and there.

Jack smirked at Will before gathering up the cloth again and washing his back, coaxing a moan out of Will when he allowed his hand to dip past the other man's waist.

Jaden just smirked as she glanced over from the corner of her eye. Wouldn’t want to embarrass the poor smithy anymore than she already had, Jack’d probably kill her if Will became to embarrassed to play.

Jack caught her eye and tossed her a smirk and a wink as he abandoned the washcloth to run soapy hands over Will's body. "Do ye enjoy th' attention yer gettin', lad?" he purred in Will's ear, making sure Jaden heard everything. "Don't lie ta me now, Will." A hand slipped beneath the water and Will gasped. "Ah, I see ye are."

Jaden giggled quietly as she wandered over to a wall and laid a hand on it, keeping the two men in her line of sight. “Are they always this bad, girl?” She asked the ship with a smirk.

The feeling of quiet amusement floated back towards Jaden and jack looked up in surprise. "Ye are a special one if me Pearl likes ye well enough ta talk to ye as well," he said, awe and respect in his voice.

Jaden fully turned to him to answer with a shrug, “I know that everything has a spirit and that the more people care for it the more aware whatever becomes. Add to the fact that she was under magic for however long and she’s bound to be more awake than most Ship Spirits.”

Will turned glazed eyes on her. "The Pearl's still selective about who she talks to," he quietly said. "As far as I know, only Jack and I are privileged enough to have her answer us when we talk to her."

“Huh.” She said in slight confusion before shaking it off and giving an evil grin, “I bet if it hadn’t be for the magic binding them all she would have pitch Barossa and crew right into the biggest group of sharks she could find after you got left on that island.” She mused with a wink to Jack.

A firm affection to her response caused Jack to burst out laughing. "That's me Pearl," he cooed, stroking the wooden floor like he had been stroking Jaden's arm earlier. "Me poor Pearl's been through so much but she shines now like she was meant to." He grinned at Jaden before resuming his wash of Will who moaned as talented fingers stroked and petted skin. "Do ye think yer clean enough, Will?"

“He’s not babbling yet. Or do you wait until you have him horizontal before you do that?” Jaden teased as she now openly watched the two, wishing she had a pen and notebook for notes.

Jack chuckled and pulled Will out of the now grimy water, earning a small yelp where the air hit his wet skin. "Much more fun ta get him babblin' when he's lyin' in me bed," he stated, grabbing a towel and wiping the excess water off of Will, who still had a slightly dazed look on his face.

Jaden giggled and reached over, lightly patting Will’s cheek, “Hey Will. Earth to Willie. Anybody home in there?”

Will blinked before focusing on her and that adorable blush darkened his face again. "Forgive me, my lady, I am a bit distracted at the moment," he managed to get out without stuttering.

Jaden cackled as she shrugged, “Hey it’s all good. If I had that petting me, I’d be out of it too. I just wanted to make sure someone was still awake in there.”

Jack smirked at her, grabbing her wrist as he steered Will towards his bed, taking her with them. "Let's discuss this in a more comfortable settin'," he purred, shoving them both gently onto his bed before gazing down at them as Will automatically wrapped his arms around Jaden to hold her safely on the bed. "Beautiful."

“And he gives excellent cuddles. If you don’t keep him Jack I’m huntin’ you down and taking the Pearl." She snorted. "Hell she’ll probably come with me willingly.” Jaden reported as she snuggled farther into Will’s arms so she could be comfortable.

Jack smirked and prowled over onto the bed, hovering over his two beautiful treasures. "Now lass, 'tis not nice ta threaten ta take another man's most prized possessions," he purred, dragging a hand up her leg.

“Who’s threatenin’? It’s an out right promise. Besides, who lied and told you I was nice?” She retorted as she shifted so it was Will’s leg getting petted.

Jack cackled and enveloped both of them in a hug. "I definitely think I could get ta like ya enough ta keep ya lass."

“Yeah until AnaMaria and I hit that time of the month at the same time. Then you’ll wonder what God you pissed off enough to do that to ya. Especially if the Pearl is female enough to cycle with us,” Jaden snorted with a diabolical smirk.

Jack grinned and moved in but stopped and motioned for Will to back off. "I'd say yer off again luv since yer gettin' a bit transparent around th' edges there,' he sighed, disappointed that he was loosing this one already.

Jaden sat up and looked at herself, “Ooooo. A fade out. Haven’t done one of those before.” She giggled as she quickly darted towards Jack and gave him a kiss. “I got to kiss Will earlier but realized I hadn’t gotten you so there.”

Jack purred and was about to lean in for a deeper kiss when Jaden found herself in a different room, sitting on a couch with a pair of gentlemen in uniforms staring at her with amused smiles on their faces. One man had ginger colored hair and a blue uniform jacket while his companion had long almost white blond hair with a red uniform jacket. Both wore white pants and knee high black boots and their jackets had gold fringe and braids on the shoulders.

“Okay. You two look vaguely familiar. Gimme a second and I’ll remember,” Jaden greeted as she shifted back a bit and appeared to go into deep thought.

The ginger haired man chuckled, a deep amused sound. "It is ironic that most people find us so memorable and yet, someone who suddenly appears in our quarters can't remember us," he mused, glancing at his blond companion. "I think I'm almost insulted, Zechs."

Jaden shook herself current in time to hear that last comment, “Zechs. TallGeese pilot. Means Gundam Wing. Which means I’m on an Oz base." She glared at the ceiling "What’d I ever do to you people?”

Zechs chuckled. "I'm sure whomever it was had their reason for sending you here, my dear," remarked the pilot with an aristocratic smile.

{LIKE A CETRAIN PERFECT SOLDIER SHOOTING FIRST AND ASKING QUESTIONS LATER?}

Jaden sighed a snarked back, “That’s the reason you drop me in one of the others’ laps. If they’re between him and me then they’re not as likely to get shot or hey I know drop me in one of the fives laps when they’re not all together in one spot so that the boy has a chance to explain me to everyone else. Did that make sense?”

Trieze smiled and shook his head. "Somehow I don't think that would happen easily," he replied, tilting his head slightly as he gazed at her. "You would probably be tied up and held hostage if not killed before you could prove that you were not a threat to them.”

Jaden thought for a second then sighed, “You’re probably right if I ‘m dealing with pure Gundam and not fanon Gundam. Fanon Gundam I have a chance of at least talking sense into either Deathscythe’s pilot or Sandrock’s.”

Zechs frowned slightly before things clicked. "Ah yes, I believe you would have a chance with either Mr. Maxwell or Mr. Winner," he replied. "It is a shame they are not here to talk with us."

“He says setting up a perfect entrance spot for any or all of the Gundams to come in shooting, slashing or generally making a major mess,” Jade snarked under her breath as she scouted for a safe place to hide from flying debris in the room.

There was a quiet pop and three figures appeared in the room, a tall boy with auburn hair and long bangs hiding half his face wearing a green turtleneck sweater and jeans, a short almost delicate blond boy with an open face wearing a pink shirt and vest with khaki pants, and a slender boy with a long chestnut braid wearing what looked like a priest's outfit. All three instantly had guns out and pointed at the other people in the room.

Jaden blinked for a second then fell off the couch laughing, not even bothering to be worried about the guns pointed at her, “Oh shit! I didn’t really expect that to happen. And so quietly too, are you guys feeling ill or something?”

Duo grinned manically even as he kept his gun pointed at Zechs. "Nah, just a bit surprised," he drawled, looking like he was second away from bouncing. "I mean, here we are, planning a bit of down time and then all of a sudden we're in what's apparently an Ozzie base with Eyebrows and Blondie. I've just been trying to figure out how we got here, where here is and how to get out while blowing this place up if possible."

“I think I can answer the how but as for the where and exiting you’re on your own. The how is Zechsy here delivered one hell of a straight line and the people moving me around decided to call him on it. You mind if I come with you guys? Not that these two haven’t been perfect gentlemen it’s just that they’re not really my favorite people and I don’t trust Une or someone to not come in and freak.” Jaden babbled with a bit of her own bounce.

There was a quick almost non-existent glance between the three boys before Quatre barely nodded his head and Duo cackled. "Sure. Maybe you'll be able to liven up Mr. Justice or just help me drive him crazy," he remarked as Trowa's gun shifted from her to Trieze.

Jaden eyes lit up as she struggled with herself for a moment, “Aww, screw it. Want a way to liven Chang up? Give him to these two for some fun. If they don’t screw the katana out of his ass nothing will.”

Duo cackled even as a faint blush stained Quatre's cheeks. "Now there's an idea," he chortled, moving back slightly out of lunging reach. "But right now, we've got a golden opportunity to stop this damn war standing right in front of us. Isn't that right, General Khushrenada?"

Trieze sighed and folded his hands before him, leaning against his desk. "And what exactly would you have me do, young man?" he asked, raising a forked eyebrow. "It is rather hard to call for peace when you're only a figurehead being manipulated by a larger organization that wants to control the world and the colonies."

Jaden piped up from her spot, “Easy. Go on National, Global, whatever TV and tell the public everything that happened and why it happened. Then say you’re sorry and that you’re trying to fix it. Then you five tell the psychos that created you to go climb a tree and play with themselves and each other if that’s what floats their boats.” She continued as she turned to address the three Gundam pilots.

Duo cackled at that one and even Quatre smiled. Only Trowa didn't show any emotions. A thoughtful look passed over Trieze face as he turned to glance at Zechs who shrugged. "It couldn't hurt and you did say that you wanted to show the world how bad war was," reminded the blond aristocrat.

Trieze nodded. "It would be a good time before Romefeller decides to start creating those MS Dolls that are in the planning stages," he replied.

“Sometimes the simplest answer is the right one. If I thought for one second you guys still have footage from some of the other World Wars and had something to play them on you could use that to show how screwed up in the head humans are. Now, do you promise to do everything in and out of your power to try and stop this stupidity without bloodshed?” Jaden prodded as she looked at everyone else in the room.

"I wanna know more about these Dolls," remarked Duo with a smirks. "Consider it the peace offering for this to work out."

Trieze nodded. "Rommefeller has the idea to make a mobil suit without a human pilot but fully functional, thinking it would win the war against you five and the colonies faster if the human element was taken out."

That caused the three boys to shudder in horror, even the stoic Trowa. "That's pure evil," whispered Quatre, his blue eyes huge in his pale face.

“Yep. Great idea in one respect cause you don’t have to worry about lose of life, sucky idea cause you will have a killing machine that doesn’t care what is and isn’t a threat and therefore will kill everyone and everything in it’s path.” Jaden nodded as she started trying to figure out how to word her request to the PTBs to help out a bit with this problem.

There was another slight pop and two men stood there. One was Duke Dermail, head of Rommerfeller and the other was Dekim Barton.

{HERE'S THE TWO TROUBLE MAKERS. DUO, DERMAIL'S YOURS SINCE IT WAS HIS IDEA TO DESTROY THE CHURCH.}

Jaden’s eyes widen and she grabbed the other four innocent bystanders, shoving them all under whatever cover she could find. “Can anyone say ‘bloodbath’? I knew you could.”

That little announcement caused Duo's lively face to go cold and completely shut down. His gun turned until it was firmly centered on Dermail's forehead. "Give me one good reason not to blow your brains out now, you bastard!" hissed the young man in an emotionless voice.

“It’d be over to quick. If you want him to suffer for the massacre figure out something else. Maybe tie him to a chair with one of your wet-fuse bombs duc taped to his dick so that it’ll go off when he finally pisses himself,” Jaden babbled quickly.

A maniacal gleam entered those violet eyes as a touch of tension eased out of the braided pilot. "I like that idea," he remarked, striking out with his gun before anyone could move. Dermail crumpled to the floor with blood spilling from the cut in his forehead, and those haunted eyes turned to Trieze. "Sorry 'bout the mess."

There was a soft click of a gun being cocked behind Jaden and she turned to find Trowa's face still an expressionless mask as he pointed his own gun at Dekim Barton's forehead.

"Where is Mariemaia, Dekim?" asked the lanky teen, his voice just as emotionless as if he was discussing the weather.

Jaden’s head snapped around to look at Trowa, “Wait a minute. That bitch boy still has the kiddo?” She turned to glare at the baka. “Where is she you pathetic piece of shit?”

Trowa's gaze didn't leave Dekim's face. "He would not leave a valuable tool like Mariemaia alone unless he could help it and she had guards," he replied in that same emotionless voice.

“Yo! PTBs! Need a snatch and grab on a little red headed girl by the name of Mariemaia if you please,” Jaden called upwards.

There was a bit of a shimmer this time and a transparent woman in a nun's garb stood there with a sleeping Marimaia in her arms. Silently she held out the child to Jaden before dropping a kiss on Duo's pale forehead, whispering something in his ear and shimmering out again.

“Okay that was cool. Though let me guess she said don’t hurt him?” Jaden said as she shifted the girl into a more comfortable position for both of them.

Duo looked up at her with a bit of a lost expression and tears brimming in his dark violet eyes. "Huh?"

Jaden’s eyes softened as she handed Mariemaia over to Trieze with a quick, “Here meet your daughter.” After she untangled herself from all of them she went over and wrapped Duo in a hug. “It’s okay, sweetie. It’s okay.”

Trieze looked down at the sleeping child in his arms startled before a softer look appeared on his face. Duo wrapped his arms around her, holding on tight as his gun dropped to the carpet from nerveless fingers. "She said she was proud of me," he whispered into her shirt.

“Of course she is. You’re trying to protect innocents that can’t protect themselves. Anyone would be proud of you for that,” Jaden cooed in a motherly tone as she gently rocked the boy back and forth.

There was a thump behind them, and Duo quickly freed himself, training and instincts taking over as he scooped up his gun to find Trowa standing over the unconscious form of Dekim, his gun lowered at his side.

“Wow. I’m impressed. You didn’t kill the bitch boy. So what are we going to do with that one?” Jaden praised as she nodded towards Bitch Boy.

Trowa shook his head. "He's not dead," he replied staring at Trieze. "Lisa Barton was being controlled by him as was his son before Trowa died. That is why you never knew you had a daughter. He saw it as the perfect leverage against you."

“And yet again I ask: What are we going to do with him?” Jaden snarked as she folded her arms across her chest. "Tie him to the same chair as the other one but under him so that the other has a full ass when the charge goes off?"

Trieze shook himself out of his stupor. "I have a better idea," he replied looking at the three Gundam pilots before holding the still sleeping Mariemaia out to Trowa. "If you three would kindly take her into the next room until it is safe again? There is also a phone in there for you to use to call whomever you wish. The line is secure and no one at the base monitors it for privacy reasons."

He glanced at Jaden. "How do you feel about being a material witness to both of their crimes?"

Jaden thought for a moment then shrugged, “Sure. No problem. Still liked my idea better though. Especially if we took pictures before hand for their Significant Others that just looked like it was really, really kinky sex.”

Trieze snorted. "The only problem is that they'd have to have a significant other that cares," he drawled, walking over to the desk and pressing a button as the bedroom door closed behind the three boys and his daughter. "Please send Lady Une and Leutenant Noin to my quarters please."

“True. Okay Noin I vaguely remember was fairly level headed and willing to listen before shooting. Une I’m not so sure about, am I safe?” Jaden asked a bit worriedly.

Treize chuckled and leaned against his desk again. "Yes, my lady is evening out some," he replied with a smile. "It was a bit of a chemical imbalance in her bloodstream but once it was identified, she was able to get it leveled out again."

“Oh. Good. Glad she figured it out and it wasn’t anything serious,” Jaden chirped as she settled back onto the couch while keeping an eye on the two bodies.

A few minutes later, there was a polite knock on the door and Trieze called for them to enter and two women in uniform did. The one with the brown hair in a bun and glasses glanced at the two unconscious men on the floor. "Is there a problem, General?" she asked.

Trieze nodded. "If you could get some men you trust to take Duke Dermail and Dekim Barton to the special cells that were constructed for the Gundam pilots, I would appreciate it," he said before nodding to Jaden. "Miss Jaden here has brought to our attention certain crimes that they have committed and I'm sure once we start digging, we will find other things to charge them with."

Jaden just stretched, bending herself over the back of the couch, causing every vertebra in her back from the base of her skull to the tip of her tailbone to crack loudly. “Ohhhhhh. Daaammmnnn. I didn’t know I needed that.” She cooed as she slid back down.

Noin chuckled slightly and reached up to close Zech's mouth for him before turning back to Trieze. "And the Gundam pilots?" she asked, reaching down to pick up a long strand of chestnut hair off of the light carpet. "Are we talking about a peace truce with them?"

“Yep. If I have to beat it into every single one of their darling little heads. And that’s on both sides of the table. Hi by the way,” Jaden greeted cheerfully with a little wave at the ladies.

Une glanced at Jaden before ordering a security detail to Trieze quarters. When they arrived, she ordered them to take the two prisoners to the Gundanium cell, and glanced at the blood on the carpet when the men were removed. "Shall I have housekeeping deal with the stains, sir?" she asked. "Or shall we invite the Gundam pilots back out and discuss the Peace Accord?"

“I can go keep an eye on the kiddo if she isn’t awake yet. If anyone does or says something to incredibly stupid I’m sure I’ll be told,” Jaden offered as she stood up and headed towards the bedroom door.

Giggling laughter greeted Jaden when she opened the door to find Duo and Quatre playing with an awake Mariemaia while Trowa looked on with a faint smile in his eyes.

“But I don’t want to be caught in a boring ass meeting,” Jaden whined very softly under her breath as she too smiled at the scene in front of her.

Duo smirked and bounced over at her. "Don't worry, I doubt it will be boring," he smirked only to whirl around and scoop up Mariemaia, tickling the little girl until she shrieked for mercy.

“True with you there, boring will be the very last thing it’ll be. We also need to snag the other two pilots for this to be a real Peace meeting,” Jaden smirked as she reached out and smoothed some of the wild red hair down.

"They're on their way without their Gundams, and this evening we will be expecting a broadcast from Trieze Khushrenada announcing the end of the war and the colonies freedom to govern themselves," remarked Quatre with an innocent smile as he emerged into the room, nodding politely at the women.

“Cool.” Jaden said as she took the little girl and walked over to Trieze. “Sweetie, this is your Daddy. You get to live with him now. How ‘bout that?” She introduced as she turned the girl to face her father.

The little girl looked up at him with serious blue eyes. "I won't have to go back to Grandfather's house ever again?" she asked in a serious, adult way and Trieze shook his head. She smiled. "I think I like you."

“Rock on. Would you let him hold you for awhile. I think he missed you,” Jaden asked as she shifted the girl a little closer.

She climbed up into Trieze lap and snuggled down as if it was the most natural thing in the world for her to do. "Another reason for this war to stop," murmured Noin with a small smile.

“Yep.” Jaden agreed quietly.

About a half hour later, the other two Gundam pilots arrived. During that time, Trieze had been writing something with one hand and holding his once-more sleeping daughter with his other. "Ah good, you're all here," he greeted as Heero Yuy and Chang Wufei slipped into the room.

Jaden clapped her hands and chirped, “Great! Hail, hail the gang’s all here. Now we can get down to this peace business.”

Trieze handed over the piece of paper that he had been scribbling on. "Here, a peace accord between Earth and the Colonies, allowing the Colonies to rule themselves once more, and stating that the Gundam pilots are cleared of any and all crimes they apparently committed during the fight to free the Colonies," he announced, as Chang Wufei took the paper to read over before handing it to Quatre. "Is there anything else you wish?"

"What about OZ?" asked Duo, a thoughtful look on his face as he played with the end of his braid.

“And the dingbat company with the mobil dolls?” Jaden added.

Trieze started writing on another sheet of paper. "I will hand over all the information I have on the Dolls including names of those creating them, but seeing as how Dermail and Dekim Barton both are in custody, that will make things easier," he stated. "As for OZ, what would you like us to do? OZ is the elite of the Alliance military, and if we just shut OZ down, that would be many people out of work."

“So don’t shut it down. Turn them into teachers and such. Or a tightly leashed counter terrorist group or something. It shouldn’t be *that* hard to find something for them to do,” Jaden suggested with a shrug.

Duo sighed and leaned back on the couch, relaxing as Trowa's hands started rubbing the stress out of his shoulders. "Thanks Tro," he murmured before staring at the others. "Sounds like we need Her Royal Peacefulness here, but frankly, I don't wanna be around her myself."

Jaden shuddered, “Amen and thank you mah brother!” She preached, mimicking the old gospel preachers. “Anyone that sickenly goodie-goodie is on some seriously good drugs.”

Zechs flushed, embarrassed. "Surely my sister is not that bad," he protested slightly.

Duo snorted and laid back with his head in Trowa's lap. "No, she's worse," he retorted. "Do you know how many safe houses we've lost because she managed to track us there in that god-awful pink limo of hers and not more than a day later, you were knocking on our door?"

“Yeah what he said.” Jaden collaborated with a jerk of her thumb towards Duo. “Not to mention the girl just will not get it through her thick head that not everything in the world is sweetness and light and peace isn’t everything it’s cracked up to be. Human beings as a race need adversity to thrive. That’s a cold, hard fact of life. She just doesn’t get it. I know she’s your sister and all but there it is.”

"Unfortunately, we still need her here to proceed because she has all the weight of power," objected Quatre with a helpless shrug. "Without her, this treaty is a nice set of words.”

“Damn. You mean Zechs already abdicated the throne to her?” Jaden whined as she glared at the just out of reach pilot. “You baka.”

Zechs flinched. "It wasn't really my decision," he objected with a tired sigh. "The Council that was ruling Sanq decided that she would be easier to control as well as be a better figurehead than a warrior prince for their peaceful nation."

“Okay so they’re the bakas.” Jaden amended, then sighed, “So I guess we’re all in agreement that little Miss I-Love-Pink-Ask-Me-How needs to be here to completely ratify this treaty?”

Duo snickered at that while a few smiles flashed over a couple of faces before serious masks were put back into place. "Yes I do believe she is needed," remarked Trieze. Before he had finished the last word, there was another pop and Relena was standing there, a confused look on her face.

Jaden spoke up immediately, “You. See that. Sign it. Then you can be put back where you were.” She ordered Relena as she pointed to the pieces of paper with the treaty drawn up on them.

Relena folded her arms and stared down at the strange woman. "Who are you to order me around?" she asked in her most haughty voice.

“Right now? Queen and Goddess of the Universe. That is a peace treaty stopping this idiotic war. Now sign it!” Jaden barked as she mirrored the pose.

Relena flushed slightly before picking up the paper and carefully reading it over before signing it with an over-flourished signature, one that she had obviously been practicing since she gained the throne. "There."

“Thank you. Now shoo.” Jaden said as she made the motions.

There was another pop just as Relena was opening her mouth and she vanished, causing everyone to stare at her in awe.

“God I love my work. Okay one last thing and then I think I’ll have done all the damage I can here. Yo, PTBs can we de-PTSD the boys so that they can survive the peace? And deprogram poor Heero so that he’s normal in his thinking?” Jaden asked nicely at the ceiling.

{UM, WE CAN DO SOME OF IT, BUT THERE'S STILL GONNA BE A FEW NIGHTMARES. SORRY BOYS. AS FOR HEERO, WE CAN GET HIM TO LIGHTEN UP SOME, BUT HE STILL HAS A *TON* TO LEARN UNLESS SOMEONE WANTS HIM NOW.}

Jaden nodded, “Okay. That’s cool. So anyone want a slightly battered boytoy to train?” She asked with a grin.

Duo smirked at Zechs and Trieze. "How about it?" he drawled, his eyes twinkling. "I'm sure you could help him like you can help Chang.”

“Oh yeah. I forgot.” Jaden drawled as she turned to Wefei. “See those two? You’re their new toy. Play nice.”

Wufei started sputtering and glaring but couldn't get anything past his lips. Trieze smirked at Wufei and held up Marimaia. "Care to assist with a new daughter, little Dragon?" he purred.

Jaden just settled back and giggled at the chaos she had caused for a bit. “Oh yeah. Nobody answered me on who wanted Heero?”

Duo frowned. "Sorry, man, I'll help you learn to live in this world but I don't think we'd work out in the long run," he confessed, an embarrassed blush staining his cheeks. "We've got too much shit in our pasts to work out." He nodded over at Zechs. "Maybe someone like Blondie there could help."

Jaden nodded, “Yeah those two would understand each other but I could just see one of them starting to brood and kick the other into the same mood. We’d need someone a bit like you to snap them out of it when that happens.”

Trieze smirked. "So I suppose I'm out of it then?" he inquired. "I know you gave Mr. Chang to us, "He indicated Zechs with a tilt of his head. "but I wouldn't mind teaching Mr. Yuy as well."

“That’ll work. As long as Relena doesn’t get her psychotic little mitts on him and he’s treated right I don’t mind,” Jaden agreed with a nod.

Une and Noin traded glances. "Perhaps we could train the pampered princess into a better ruler," mused Une with a small smile and Noin nodded. "Permission to 'guard' Relena, sir?"

Trieze nodded. "Remember not to do any permanent damage."

Saluting the two women left to make plans and Trieze stood up, handing his daughter over to Wufei. "If you gentlemen will excuse me, I have some orders to issue and a broadcast to get ready for."

Jaden studied the scene once more then gave a sharp nod, “I think I’ve done all the damage I can do here. Have fun, be peaceful, and remember that laughter can cure almost anything. Yo, Scotty! Beam me up, dude.”

{IF YOU SAY SO.}

There was a blink and she was standing on a country road in the middle of nowhere. There were some trees on one side with a faint wisp of smoke coming from that direction but no other sign of life.

“Okie-dokie. Now where am I?” Jaden muttered as she edged toward the smoke.

Standing just inside the trees was a large black horse with red eyes and twisted horns that also looked to be part machine. It was tethered to a tree and nearby was a small cooking fire where a person in a black cloak and wide brimmed hat was cooking something. A large sword was slung across his back.

“Oh words! Hey Mister,” Jaden said cheerfully as she tried to stay out of his swing range in case she startled him, stranger things had happened.

Cool blue eyes looked at her out of a classically handsome if extremely pale face and a brief breeze blew through the glade, tossing his thick dark hair away from his sharply pointed ears.

“So ya mind if I borrow a bit of ground by the fire. I’m kinda tired,” Jaden tried as she remembered that D wasn’t much of a talker.

He turned back to the fire but moved out of the way to reveal a bedroll out and ready to use. "Sleep if you wish," he said in a deep smooth voice.

“Thanks.” Jaden chirped as she curled up in the bedroll. “Worse than Heero ever was about the silent thing.” She muttered quietly to herself with a touch of amusement in her voice.

"Oh I don't know," chirped a gravely if slightly muffled voice. "D can be quite the talker when he's in his cups."

Jaden giggled, “I bet. Plus he’s got you to do all the talkin’ for him.”

A few minutes later, D placed a cup of water and a plate of food next to the bedroll. "If you're hungry," he said before claiming a seat at the base of another tree and digging into his own meal, a cup of red liquid near by.

“Coolness. Suppose I should eat before trying to nap. Thanks,” Jaden mumbled as she also dug into her food.

D finished off his plate, drank his cup, before putting his things away and sitting back down, his cloak pulled around him and his hat low on his head.

Jaden finished up her meal and tried to wipe some of what was left off the plate with a leaf and set her things with his. “Okay. I’ve *got* to ask: What does the D mean? Does it stand for your father’s name or something?”

Startled blue eyes looked up at her as D lifted his head. "No one has asked me before," he replied, his voice slightly curious. "It's for Dmitri."

“Oh. Very cool. I like it. Better than Alucard, which is what Drac’s son was named in another story.” Jaden babbled a bit startled that her question was actually answered.

A gravelly cackle came from the depths of his cloak and a frown passed over D's face as he raised his left hand, a face appearing in the wrinkles even as his sharp nails gleamed with a lethalness in the fading sunlight. "Aren't you going to brag about your father, D?"

D snorted. "Alucard is just Dracula spelled backwards," he replied, ignoring Left Hand's comment.

“I know. Hence why I’m not that impressed with it. It sounds cool and all but there’s no imagination put into it. It’d be like calling you Dracula Jr. or something,” Jaden agreed.

Large blue eyes gazed at her now. "Who are you to know who my father is?" he asked, his voice cooling.

The answer came from the being in his left hand. "She's what's known as a Mary-Sue, D,” drawled the hand. "She's practically omniscient, but is a ton of fun to be around."

“YES!!! FINALLY!! Someone who knows what a Mary-Sue is.” Jaden crowed joyfully as she threw her hands wide and fell back on the bedroll.

"As if I haven't run into one or three dozen over the centuries," drawled Left Hand with a snort. "Do you know how many girls and guys fantasize about being the one true love of tall dark and handsome here?"

“Considering I’m one of them, yeah. My question is how many at least get into his pants? Can’t be very many or he wouldn’t be nearly as broody,” Jaden snarked with a grin and a wink at D.

D snorted. "I have taste," he replied drolly. "If I tumbled every woman or man who wanted me, I'd never get any work done."

Jaden squeaked and started giggling madly, “Hand, you gotta teach him not to give out lines like that. That was almost to good to pass up.”

D smirked as Left Hand cackled. "Maybe it was an invitation," he remarked softly as the sky grew darker. He glanced up at the sky before getting up. "I'll be right back." Then he vanished among the trees.

Jaden just sat there staring at the vacant spot, “Uhhh, babble. Xanlish even.” She gulped as she came out of her daze.

A few minutes later there was a hum that started before fading out and he returned, placing his sword against a tree and removing his hat.

“Sooooo, what happened? If you don’t mind my asking?” Jaden inquired calmly as she watched him.

"Protection spell," replied D, unhooking his cape and spreading it on the ground to leave him clad in his dark leather armor-like outfit. "It will hold against most everything and is a dome so nothing can come down on us."

“Ah. What about from under us? To many sneaky monster horror stories,” Jaden explained with an apologetic grin.

"There are no burrowing creatures anywhere close by," replied D, the blue amulet on his chest catching the firelight.

“Rock on. What’s the pretty around your neck?” She asked as she tried to get a closer look.

D looked startled but came over to sit next to her, one hand holding out the medallion. "It's a key in a way," he explained, letting her see the faint bit of circuitry hidden beneath the stone. "A mix of magic and science, it identifies me as Prince Dmitri Vladislov Dracula and has allowed me into many vampires' castles or safe houses to talk with them."

“Useful little bauble. So what do people do for fun around here beside brood?” Jaden chirped, knowing she was walking right into a zinger.

D looked down at the ground, letting his hair fall over his face to create a curtain between them. "I don't brood," he objected. "I'm satisfied with the way things have turned out for the most part and why should I dwell on little things that I can't change?" His voice was a bit strained and forced as if he was talking through clenched teeth.

“What’s the matter?” Jaden asked concerned but careful not to touch him, just in case.

"I don't want to hurt you," he confessed, still not looking up at her. "But you're very tempting right now."

“Oh HELL! I forgot you had to fight your fangs as well as you libido. Ummm, if it matters any, sorry. Would me moving to the other side of the fire help any? ” She offered.

He shook his head briefly and backed off, returning to his cloak. "It's been a long time since anyone has not been afraid of me and willing to talk to me after knowing what I am." He glanced up at her with eyes that were taking on a slight red hue. "It's a heady experience."

Jaden snorted, “If it wasn’t for the fact I know you’re needed here in this world, I’d offer you a spot traveling with me until we could find you someone to play with that wasn’t scared of you. You’re not dangerous unless something happens that makes you so. People are stupid.”

D shrugged. "It's a fact of life," he replied almost blandly. "Humans only see the vampire and the vampires only see the human."

Jaden looked up, “Are we sure we have to leave him here? Can’t we like either take him to someone or bring someone here?”

{THE ONLY PEOPLE WE KNOW ARE IN A DIFFERENT FANDOM BUT THERE IS A POSSIBILITY. GIVE US A FEW}

“K. Cool.” Jaden chirped. “Hey, D, can you handle a cuddle and maybe a kiss if I feel brazen enough?”

D looked up and nodded slowly. "I'm trying to relax," he apologized, his fangs flashing in the firelight.

Jaden shrugged as she got up and moved toward him, “I don’t care about the fangs. I like vampires as long as they’re polite. Hell, I’ll even let you have a sip if you think it’ll help.”

D smiled slightly. "It might and I would make sure you would enjoy it," he murmured, scooting over some so she could sit next to him.

“Ummm, love a guy with long hair and a sexy voice,” she purred under his ear as she snuggled into him and nuzzled his neck.

He growled slightly in warning, hoping she would back off a bit, knowing he was stronger than her and could easily hurt her.

Jaden just shivered, “Growling at me won’t work. It just makes me worse. Wanna see?” She teased as she shifted and very carefully just set her teeth on his earlobe.

His lips pulled back in a snarl, revealing his long fangs and he twisted, cradling the back of her head in one long fingered hand before claiming her mouth in an almost desperate kiss.

Jaden just relaxed into his grip and purred as she deliberately nicked her tongue on one of his fangs.

He moaned and held her closer, sucking on the slight wound she had made, taking what was freely offered.

Jaden was whimpering by now and trying to crawl into his armor with him. <Screw the Mary-Sue laws! This is to good to pass up.>

{WE'RE WILLING TO BEND THE MS LAWS IF YOU ARE, DARLING} was whispered in her head.

<Thank you!!!> She mentally shouted back before turning all her attention on the poor, unsuspecting dhampire.

D's arms encircled her waist, his hands trailing along her shirt before bunching it up so he could trail his nails gently over her skin as he continued to kiss her.

Jaden just shifted until she was straddling him and lightly ran *her* nails across the back of his neck while she nipped his bottom lip.

D pulled back lightly, his eyes wavering between blood red and deep sapphire blue. "You play dangerously," he growled before whipping her shirt off and dropping it next to them before pulling his own off. Then he pulled her back against him, moaning into her mouth once more as her warm skin came in contact with his slightly cooler form.

Jaden shivered for half a second at the coolness then went back to seeing how crazy she could make the guy.

Trailing his hands down her back, he stopped briefly at her bra and with a casual flick of his hand, had it open before he started kissing his way down her neck, slowly bending her backwards over his arms.

Jaden just grinned and slid her own hands down his chest, raking her nails a little harder before pulling her arms back above her head and crossing her wrists.

Growling, D spun around and laid her on the ground, her bra jerked up to entangle her wrists as he smirked down at her. "So very nice," he purred, continuing his interrupted journey down her soft skin.

He paused when he reached her nipples, gently sucking on one as his hand came up to play with the other, drawing a delighted moan out of Jaden as she arched into his touch, Chuckling slightly, he continued sucking and gently nibbling as his other hand wandered down to play with the fastenings of her jeans. A quick flick of his wrist and a slow teasing pulling of the zipper was all he needed before leaning back slightly to pull her jeans, shoes and socks off in one smooth motion, leaving her clad only in her underwear and the bra that still tangled her wrists.

Standing, he gazed down at her before slipping out of the rest of his clothes, leaving them lying in a pile as he stood there, gazing down at her as the firelight made her skin glow.

"So beautiful," he whispered before kneeling next to her once more.

He stretched out next to her, running a hand down her side, making sure to keep his touch light but not ticklish as he leaned down to kiss her some more. She wasn't afraid of him and actually encouraged him to play some with his vampiric nature. A quick tug and her underwear was gone, leaving her naked beside him, and he chuckled into her mouth as he threaded his fingers lightly through her damp curls.

"Now we have some fun, my lovely tease," he whispered.

“Please and thank you?” She chirped with an impish grin.

He chuckled and slipped his hand between her legs, making her writhe for all the right reasons as he gently stroked her even as his head came down to lick and nibble at her nipples.

His free hand slipped something out of his pouch and he paused in his administrations just long enough to rip open the wrapper and slip the little piece of rubber on before shifting and burying his face between her legs.

Gently, he started licking and nibbling as he used his fingers to tease and flick the little bundle of nerves, sending her moaning and thrashing against him. Her moans increased when he carefully slipped a finger into her tightness, gently preparing her for what was to come eve as he continued to lap at the liquid that soaked his fingers.

He felt her muscles starting to clench around his fingers and started moving a bit faster, wanting to bring her over at least once before he had his way with her. Crying out, she arched as her muscles clamped around his fingers with an almost dizzying force and he gently stroked her until she came down. Removing his fingers, he leaned up over her and deliberately licked them off as she watched.

He smirked down at her, his eyes fully blood red. "Don't pass out on me yet, lovely. We're just getting started," he purred, leaning down to kiss her even as he slipped into her. Wrapping his arms around her waist, he sat back on his heels, pulling her up with him, and earning a startled squeak and moan at the sudden shift in position.

A quick twist of his hands and her bra was joining the rest of their clothes, freeing her hands to touch him as he touched her. He gently settled his hands on her hips, encouraging her to ride him and left one there as she got into the rhythm. He ran his free hand through her hair and brought her in close to nibble on her ears only to hiss in delight when she nipped his pointed ears hard. Rolling his head back to bare his throat, he moaned when she threaded her hands through his hair and gripped hard enough to hurt some before latching onto his neck in a sucking bite.

Groaning, he leaned back, stretching his legs out as he lay on the ground with Jaden still riding him and sucking on his neck. "Harder, pretty one," he groaned, his sharp nails lightly raking down her back to grasp her hips, encouraging her to take him harder and faster. "Please!"

A chuckle was the only warning he got before she bit down, hard. Howling, he rolled them over and started pounding into her, his hips snapping with an almost bruising force as she sucked even harder on his neck. Snarling, his head came down and he sank his fangs into her shoulder, sending her screaming into her second orgasm of the night with him following her. He gently pulled his fangs out and licked the wound until it stopped bleeding, which only took a few seconds since he had bitten far enough away from any major arteries to be safe.

She only hummed quietly with a small whimper of protest when he slipped free of her. Tossing the used condom in the fire, D grabbed a wash cloth and a bucket of water that had been sitting next to the fire and cleaned her up before cleaning himself up. He gently picked her up and carried her over to the bedroll, covering her up with the blanket and his cloak before he got dressed again. Stretching out next to her, he pulled her close and drifted off to sleep, more content than he had been in quite a while.

The next morning found Jaden waking up a hell of a lot less sore than she thought she had any right to be considering what happened last night as she purred in delight. <Last night. I wonder if I can keep this one?> She purred mentally as she snuggled farther into D’s arms.

{DO YOU REALLY WANNA STAY WITH HIM CONSIDERING THE MENTALITY OF THE PEOPLE IN HIS TIME?} asked a soft voice in her mind. {BESIDES WE DO HAVE TWO PEOPLE IN MIND FOR HIM.}

Jaden sighed. <I suppose you’re right. And good thought on getting two of them cause if he’s like that all the time he’ll wear out one in no time. Oh, while we’re on the subject what’s the protocol on STDs and pregnancy?> She asked as she woke up a bit more.

{NON-EXISTANT AND AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN WHILE WE HAVE SAY. IN THAT ORDER} came the smirking reply.

<Rock on. I need some new catch phrases. Have to work on that.> Jaden replied with a mental bounce. <So when are his new toys showing up?>

{SOON SO I'D SUGGEST GETTING DRESSED.}

< But I don’t want to move.> Jaden whined as she tried to scoot out of D’s arms, only to feel them tighten a bit. <And truthfully I’m not sure I can.> She continued with a giggle.

D didn't let her go, not wanting to loose the warmth of her against him. Sighing, he nuzzled her neck before drifting off into a deeper sleep.

<See what I mean.> Jaden snarked in a so there tone of voice.

{BUT YOU'RE SO CUTE TOGETHER.}

<So zap my clothes on me. I know it’s not out of your scope of power.> Jaden suggested as she nuzzled D’s neck in return.

{HANG ON A BIT.} There was a funny wiggle over her skin and she was dressed again in clean clothes. The only thing she didn't have on was her socks and shoes.

<Kick ass. Forgot I upped to the rating on this thing and I could cuss more.> She chirped with a giggle.

There as a stumbling noise just beyond the trees and some swearing in a British accent before a dazed Spike and Xander stumbled into the clearing, freezing at the sight of D and Jaden.

Jaden’s eyes widen, “Ohhhh. They’ll be perfect for him. Thank you.” She cooed out loud as she looked them over to see which season they were from.

{IT'S CONSTRUCTION XANDER WITHOUT THE ANYA INFLUENCE AND SNARKY SPIKE WITH THE GEM OF AMARA BUT NO REAL DESIRE TO MUNCH HIS WAY THROUGH THE HUMAN POPULATION} came the reply and D rolled over onto his feet with his sword in his hand, appearing to levitate into position.

Jaden got up more slowly both from being sore and so as not to startle D, “It’s alright D. This is Xander and Spike, they’re here to keep you company and be your new toys if you want.” She explained calmly as she pointed out who was who.

D studied them both. "A human and a vampire," he stated in his almost flat, emotionless voice. "They are not from this time."

Spike smirked and lit up a cigarette. "What was yer first clue, mate?" he drawled, running his eyes over the tight leather-like armor. He always did have a weakness for the dark ones and this one could give Angelus a run for the title of "Demon with the face of an angel".

“No but if you think about it neither am I. Trust me according to everything in both their canon and fanon universes they are sweet and cuddly with, as you can see, enough snark to keep you on your toes,” Jaden soothed as she shot Spike a zip it look.

Xander shot D a goofy grin and started forward, his hand out. "Xander Harris," he greeted. "I know you're not human, but you're definitely more interesting than what we left. That's Spike, the Blond Menace and he's really good in a fight."

Spike smirked. "Yer not half bad yerself, Nummy."

“Guys this is D. He’s what’s known as a dhampire around here. Meaning he was born from a union between a vampire and a human so he’s half vamp. And are you going to looooove that fact,” Jaden quipped with a knowing little smirk and a slight shift of weight. “As you can probably guess ya ain’t in Sunnyhell anymore or with the Slayer brats. I’ll let him explain this world more.”

D continued to gaze at them before gesturing to the empty side of the fire, sitting down to start breakfast, making a large portion when he noticed the hungry look on Xander's face. "The short history is that several millennia ago, certain humans pushed buttons they shouldn't have. Vampires being smarter grabbed a bunch of humans and waited out the nuclear winter in underground bunkers. Vampires have ruled the humans even after they came above ground with King Vladimir Dracula ruling the vampires. Then humans grew tired of their vampire masters and rose up. Now there are few vampires, or Nobles as they're also called, left, and I am hired to hunt them when they step out of line."

"What's the year?" asked Xander with a slight frown.

"12090 AD," replied D.

Jaden snuggled in close to D and just watched the interaction between the three males.

"Vampires can also have children whith humans, resulting in a dhampire, a half-human half-vampire that's distrusted by both," continued D, absently brushing his hair behind a pointed ear. "Dhampires however make some of the best vampire hunters because we have the inhuman strength and speed needed to fight vampires as well as the ability to walk during the day. The drawback is that we still need blood to survive and Heat Syndrome."

"What's Heat Syndrome?" asked Spike, speaking for the first time since this dhampire's tale began.

”Heat Syndrome is when a dhampire has been out in the sun too long or out in a hot day," explained D, dishing up some stew for everyone including Spike which surprised him briefly. "I can't breath, I can't really stand, concentrating is impossible, and I start radiating a feverish heat. The only way to help is either bury me up to my neck in a hole or to get me into a cool cellar. Blood also helps in the recovery, but it is not needed."

"Hey D, why don'tcha fill 'em in on who your pop is?" chortled that gravelly voice and D clenched his left hand a bit tighter, ignoring the muffled protests.

Xander looked around curious. "Who's that?"

"Nothing," D answered quickly, a bit too quickly for Xander and Spike, who stared at him with patient gazes that said they wren't going anywhere until he told them or they were going to start bugging him for answers. With a defeated sigh, D opened his hand and held it up to see the wrinkled face there.

The face blinked and grinned at them, revealing a couple of teeth. "Well, both of you are easy on the eyes and I bet you'll take good care of our little prince here."

Jaden piped up, “Hand be nice. They had a bad experience with their version of Papa so it might make them a bit skittish. Oh, and Xander, yes I’m in another Mary-Sue but I don’t plan on being quite as much a stickler for the rules this time.”

Spike cackled. "So you're the one that got away," he chortled, eyeing her appreciatively. "Nice. Got good taste, luv." He smirked at her even as he nodded to Xander and D. "So yer Dracula's son. Is that what th' D stands for?"

"It's for Prince Dmitri Vladislov Dracula," he replied. "But it would be hard to get hired if I ran around letting everyone know I was Dracula's dhampire son."

D glanced at her and moved away slightly. "You're becoming transparent. Everything all right?"

Jaden glanced down at herself, “Wow. Two fade outs in one fic. I feel down right special.” She looked back at D. “Yeah I’m fine. This just means it’s time for me to go.” She leaned in and gave him a kiss. “Be good and be happy. Bye guys.”

The next thing she knew, she was sitting on a bench outside a blues club in the evening with the sun setting. The air was cooler here with the hint of rain in the air.
“Okay. Let’s see where I am now,” she muttered as she stood up and took a look at the sign on the club.

A tall, powerful looking man with curling hair pulled back into a ponytail and wearing a trench coat walked past her without a second look and entered the club, letting out the delightful sounds of blues and jazz.

“And hello to you too Duncan McLeod of the Clan McLeod,” Jaden snarked under her breath as she realized what fandom she was in now.

Another man followed Duncan in, tall and aristocratic with a Romanesque nose but he glanced at her with hawk-like eyes and smirked in an inviting way before he vanished into the club too.

“And in the tried and true style of Animanics: Hellooooo, Methos,” she continued as she followed that Immortal into the club, at least it would be warmer.

Duncan was sitting at the bar with his back to the room, sulking over a beer while Methos was lounging on his stool with his elbows on the counter and his back to the bar, a bottle held in one hand. "I dinnae understand it," remarked Duncan. "Why are all of 'em comin' after me now?"

Jaden slid onto the stool on the other side of Duncan, deciding to listen for a bit before jumping into this one. That tended to make one lose their head in this fandom.

Methos snorted. "Duncan, I told you that your white knight complex was going to haunt you," he drawled, smirking over at Jaden and nodding to the bartender to put her drink on his tab. He lowered his voice slightly. "Besides, you’re the only one I know of that hasn't changed his name since he died."

“Or changed his opening shtick either,” Jaden snarked under her breath as she ordered a Candied Apple.

"I dinnae wanna change me name!" protested Duncan, looking like he was seconds away from pouting again. "It's who I am!"

If Jaden thought she could have gotten away with it, she would have beaten her head on the bar at that whine.

Methos sighed and ordered another beer. "No, that's who you've made yourself to be," he retorted. "You're so wrapped up in being Duncan MacLeod of the Effin Clan Macleod that you wear it like a lady's scarf. And then you complain how easy it's been for others who want your head to find you. Gods above and below, Mac, even *Connor* changes his name!" muttered Methos exasperated.

“But Duncan McLeod flows so prettily. I bet it’d be a whole different story if he had been named Mungus or something like that,” Jaden finally added her two cents to the discussion.

Methos chuckled and looked at her, his eyes twinkling. "Maybe but it's annoying as well," he remarked, cocking his head to study her even as he lowered his voice again. "You're not a normal person are you?"

Jaden shrugged, “Depends on what you call normal. I’m a Mary-Sue if that means anything to you.”

Methos smirked as he walked around to perch next to her on the other side away from Duncan. "I've believed I've heard of one or two of you floating around," he remarked. "Usually trying to jump him.” He nodded his head at the Scotsman who was still staring moodily into his beer.

Jaden gave an unladylike snort, “Not with him being such a whiney butt.”

Methos chuckled. "Yeah, he has these fits of depression where nothing can make him feel better, then he gets into a fight, wins and snaps out of it for a bit longer."

“Well, I don’t know of anyone to toss at him so what do you suggest?” She sighed, annoyed.

"How 'bout we leave him to drown his sorrows in lager while you and I find a more interesting way to pass the time," he suggested, draining the last of his bottle.

Jaden nodded as she followed suit and drained the last of her mixed drink, “Has possibilities. What did you have in mind?” <She asked innocently, as if she didn’t know.>

Methos smirked. "Well I have an illustrated copy of the Karma Sutra at my place. Wanna help me check off a few more positions in it?" he asked in an almost innocent manner.

“Hummm. I don’t know. Usually I have to put up a bit more of a fight than this. Just for show and all, can’t appear to willing or they yank my MS card,” Jaden giggled as her eyes gleamed.

Methos smirked. "I'll chase you around my apartment a few times and let you handle my whip," he offered.

If she had had animal ears they would have pricked forward at that, “Whip? That might be fun.”

Methos' smirk grew and he leaned in closer. "Perhaps I'll even give you some lessons in how to use it properly," he murmured into her ear.

She nuzzled under his and purred back, “I haven’t heard any complaints about my technique yet.”

Sliding an arm around her waist, Methos gently tugged her towards the door. "Shall we have this discussion in a more *private* setting?" He purred.

“Sure.” Jaden giggled as she snuggled into his side.

Suddenly they were standing outside Methos' apartment.

{DIDN'T THINK YOU WANTED TO WAIT DURING THE WALK OVER. ESPECIALLY SINCE IT STARTE TO RAIN.}

“Ewww. Thanks. I’m not dressed for cold rain,” Jaden tossed towards the sky.

Methos shook his head and opened the door. "After you, my lady," he invited with a sweeping bow.

She curtsied and gigglingly replied, “Why thank you kind sir.”

He followed her in, watching as her hips swayed even as he locked the door behind them and hung up his coat, removing the Claymore from its folds. 'Scuse me while I put this up real quick. Feel free to look around or even get comfortable.” With that, he vanished into the bedroom.

Jaden wandered around the apartment, careful to not touch anything that looked really old. Which was about everything but that was okay. She went ahead and took off her shoes and socks so she was a bit more comfortable and it would be one less thing to worry about later.

Methos came out of the bedroom, wearing just his pants and carrying a bullwhip in his hand. He smirked at her and unwound the whip with a loud *crack*.

“I like. Never could get one of those to snap like that though.” Jaden said calmly as she slowly grinned.

"It's all in the wrists, my dear," he replied walking over before lashing out with the whip again, this time curling it around her waist and pulling her to him. "Still wanna run?"

“Hunny, I got banged by a dhampire, who went nearly as full vampire as I think his ever gotten when he was with someone, last night. You don’t worry me,” Jaden snarked as she looped her arms around his neck.

Methos chuckled. "Then I'll have to do my best to prove that a poor mortal like myself can keep up with the Undead," he said, wrapping his arms around her waist as the whip fell to the floor around her feet.
Jaden giggled, “You can try.”

Methos sighed in mock piety. "Then I shall do my best to prove that you do not have to return to a vampire to be loved," he announced dramatically before lifting her up and carrying her into the bedroom where he fell with her onto his bed.

*fade to black*

Smiling and stretching, Jaden opened her eyes to start swearing. She was in what looked like an office of some kind and was lying on the couch with her clothes on.

“Okay. This is not what I fell asleep to. Now, where the ever lovin’ hell am I?” She grouched as she got up and looked around.

It was a military office of some kind with a large green banner on one wall and various framed commendations congratulating a "Roy Mustang" for performance above and beyond the call of duty. Surprisingly, there were no pictures in this office.

“Hummm, Roy Mustang. Why does that name sound familiar? Aww, screw it! Coffee first, thinking later,” she muttered as she went to cautiously stick her head out the door.

People in blue military uniforms milled about, not really noticing her as a woman with blond hair twisted up in a hair clip pounded away at a typewriter. Nearby, a tall man with black hair stood with his back to her, having a discussion with a young blond boy in a red coat. A rather heated discussion if the wild gestures the boy was making were any indication.

“Hey! I recognized that coat! That’s Ed’s coat. I’m in Fullmetal Alchemist. Oh, Lord the hell I could cause here,” Jaden snickered as she slid in off to the side, carefully shutting the door as she went. She wanted to see how the fight went this time.

"Really, Fullmetal, I don't see what the problem is," purred Roy, his smooth voice carrying over the general sounds of the office.

"The problem is that you didn't tell me everything!" growled Ed, shaking a finger in Roy's face. "Did you know that the town you sent us to had a phobia of alchemists. Especially *State* alchemists? Al and I were lucky we weren't crucified the second we stepped into the town!"

"I had not realized that it had gotten that bad in all honestly," began Roy when Ed interrupted him. "You wouldn't know honesty if it bit you on the ass!"

“You know, I always wondered. If honesty bit someone in the ass would that make it a painful truth?” Jaden drawled loud enough to be heard, just to see who’d do what.

There was the click of a gun being cocked as the woman behind the desk carefully rose to her feet, and Roy turned to face her, his dark eyes running over her in a few seconds. "Who are you and how did you get this far into headquarters without a visitor's pass or a guide?" asked Roy as Ed emerged from behind the tall colonel.

“Name’s Jaden. As to how I got in here,” She jerked a thumb over her shoulder at the office on the other side of the wall she was leaning against. “Woke up on the couch in there.”

Roy glanced down at Ed. "Is this one of your pranks?" he inquired as he waved the woman back. "Stand down, Hawkeye. If she was here to hurt any of us, she would have done it while we were distracted."

“Or it could be the fact that I’m not armed at the moment.” Jaden teased with a smirk as Hawkeye snapped the gun that had been lowering back into position. “Relax Hawkeye. I’m a pacifist unless circumstances dictate otherwise.”

Ed snorted and folded his arms. "I've never seen her before, Mustang," he drawled. "Besides, why would I want to leave you a girl?"

“Especially when I could have him instead?” Jaden added with a nod towards Ed.

That provoked a yelp and a blush from Ed as Roy smirked down at the young Alchemist. "Perhaps she's here to assist you in your *ahem* research, Fullmetal."

Jaden quirked an eyebrow and did a slow grin, “Ohhh. Research? What research?”

Ed glared at Roy before crossing his arms and smirking. "Jealous that you're not being drooled over by someone of the opposite sex?" he snarked before turning to Jaden. "Don't let him fool you. I'm not doing research right now since I just got back." He turned with his red coat flaring around him. "If you'll excuse me, I have a brother to calm down."

“Kid’s denser than a black hole sometimes.” Jaden muttered as she pushed off the wall. “Hey! Wait up! Maybe I can help.”

Cold amber eyes glared at her. "No thanks. I can handle it on my own." The words dripped ice as he started for the door once more only to be stopped by Roy's hand on his shoulder. Those amber eyes turned on Roy now but the colonel remained unphased.

"I believe this is a discussion better suited for my office, Fullmetal," he stated, dragging the young Alchemist towards the door. "Miss Jaden, if you would join us?"

Jaden shrugged, “Sure.” And followed them into the office, gently shutting the door behind herself.

Once inside, Ed ripped out of Roy's grip and glared at the man. "Just what is the big idea?" he demanded, hands clenched at his sides. "I need to make sure Al's all right. I don't have time for your petty games."

“So why didn’t you bring him with you? That way you could both yell at the idiot,” Jaden asked with a tilt of her head as she leaned against the door.

"Because he's in our room and doesn't want to come out for *quite* a while," Ed growled between clenched teeth and Roy flinched slightly at the accusation in his tone even as Roy dropped into the seat behind his desk.

"I wasn't told that the town was that phobic of Alchemists, Fullmetal," Roy explained. "None of our intelligence even hinted at a negative reception."

Jaden snorted, “Then you need to rotate your spies out, they’re getting tired and sloppy. Or someone’s intercepting intell.”

Roy frowned at that as he scribbled on a piece of paper. "I'll have to bring that up with Hughes," he muttered.

“Okay so aside from nearly getting lynched for breathing, anything else wrong? Besides the usual UST between you two I mean?” Jaden quipped to break the silence.

Ed looked at her confused as Roy's face tuned a faint pink. "UST?" asked Ed.

Jaden looked at Roy and grinned evilly, “Do you want to explain it or should I?”

Roy cleared his throat and managed to stop his blushing as he waved a hand towards her. "Feel free to explain it to Fullmetal since you are in a sharing mood, Miss Jaden."

Jaden just chuckled and turned to Ed. “UST means Unresolved Sexual Tension. Translation: You two have the hots for each other and won’t admit it to anyone, even yourselves.”

Ed blinked at her before bursting out laughing. "You think that I... and him..." he stuttered through laughter before fresh peals of laughter erupted from him, causing him to wrap his arms around his waist.

Jaden grinned widely and snarked, “Well that went better than expected. And he’s so cute when he really laughs like that.”

Roy smirked at her. "I'm sure that's a female's opinion of him," he remarked as Ed finally got his laughter under control and straightened up, wiping the tears off his face with his gloved right hand. "Are you done, Fullmetal?"

A few small hiccup laughs escaped before Ed settled down and threw himself onto the couch. "Yeah, I'm done."

“Hey. I’ve read plenty of fics where you held the same opinion so don’t go gettin’ all high-flutin’ on me now,” Jaden razzed as she moved over and plopped down next to Ed.

Roy looked at her oddly. "Fics?" he asked, his voice saying that he wanted answers if she wanted to keep breathing.

“Yeah, fics. You know, stories. Those things people write and read for fun sometimes. There’s some really good ones out about you two and boy do they get, ummm how to put this, steamy? at times,” Jaden explained with an evil grin knowing full well how Roy was going to take all that since she hadn’t explained being a Mary-Sue.

Ed snorted. "Then some people must be *really* bored or twisted to ever team me up with *him*," he drawled, jerking a finger at Roy with a slight clink of automail.

“You’re taking the news surprisingly well. As the more hot tempered of you two I would have figured you to be pitching a fit of epic proportions,” Jaden chirped as she gently bumped against his shoulder.

"Fullmetal's slipped into that wonderful place he likes to live in called 'denial'," purred Roy with a smirk. "He retreats there often."

“And your sitting there trying to figure out how to find those stories so you can entertain yourself into solo bliss so leave him alone,” Jaden snarked back with a mischievous glare.

Ed glared at Roy for his comment but restrained himself from saying or doing anything although it was hard. Roy always knew how to push his buttons and pull his strings, making him feel like a puppet dancing to his "master's" tune.

"Since you two seem to be having so much fun, I'll leave you alone and head back to my box until the Puppet Master needs me again," drawled Ed, standing up and starting for the door.

“Can I come with you? Pleeease? I don’t want to stay with Mister Needs-A-Date-With-His-Hand. He’s mean to people,” Jaden pleaded with a pout at the end.

Ed snorted. "Whatever," he said, continuing out the door.

“Yippy! Bye Sour Puss. Have fun with Rosie Palm and her five sisters,” Jaden chirped cheerfully as she followed Ed out the door. Making sure the entire office heard her.

Hawkeye looked up at them with a raised eyebrow and Ed only shook his head, indicating he didn't want to talk about it before he made his way out of the building and started towards the barracks where he and Al lived.

Jaden just followed like a good little puppy, trying to look everywhere at once and wondering when she was slipped enough sugar to cause her current state.

When they reached the apartment-like barracks, Ed simply went inside, ignoring the guard at the door who started to protest Jaden's entry into the building.

Jaden just looked at the guard and blinded him with a smile, “I’m with him.” She chirped as she pointed at Ed.

"But women aren't allowed in the men's barracks," protested the guard as Ed headed farther into the building.

“And if he had any idea what to do with a female I’d agree with you whole-heartedly but since he doesn’t and he’s the only one I know around here…… Which would you prefer? Me being this hyper and loose on base or this hyper and confined to his room where I can only annoy him and his brother?” Jaden argued logically with a hand on one hip and a small bounce.

The guard swallowed and moved aside to let her pass as Ed started up the stairs.

Jaden patted the poor guard on the cheek and chirped a quick, “Thank you.” Before hurrying to catch up with Ed.

Ed didn't even acknowledge her as he entered the apartment like room and dropped his red coat on the couch as he moved over to the giant suit of armor sitting on one of the beds. "How are you doing, Al?" asked Ed, softly as he placed a comforting hand on the metal shoulder.

"Brother, why didn't Colonel Mustang tell us about that town?" asked the child-like voice from the huge armor, the wariness in the tone was that of a child asking why Santa didn't come that year. "Does he not like us anymore?"

Jaden slipped in quietly and as gently as she could informed the young man, “He didn’t know. He truly didn’t, I could tell. Either his spies around there are getting tired and sloppy or someone’s not letting him have all the intell when it comes to your missions.”

Ed glared at her before reaching out and laying his other hand on Al's other shoulder. "He'll go talk to Hughes and hopefully the intel will be better next time," he sighed, wanting to collapse for once and not have to be the strong one, but his brother needed him to be strong.

Jaden wandered over and making sure to stay in Ed’s line of sight, sat down on the bed next to Al and laid a hand on the closest wrist. “Listen I know what happened sucked. I spent my entire school career being ridiculed and sometimes attacked because I was weird and different and didn’t care to conform to the norms. But think on this, you got out and now people will know that the town’s not safe for alchemists. Now others won’t blindly walk in there and get hurt.”

Al turned his head to look at her before nodding. "That does make it a bit better," he confessed, his voice holding a smile now before he looked back at Ed. "Did your meeting with Colonel Mustang go any better than you hoped, Brother?"

Ed snorted. "Just the usual shouting and general threats."

Jaden suddenly grinned and bounced a little, “And the I added my two cents and it turned into a snark war between me and Colonel Grouchy.”

Al sighed, a tired sigh that said they've had this conversation before. "Brother, you know Colonel Mustang helps us as much as he can. Why do you irritate him like that?"

Ed smirked and moved over to the other bed, dropping down on it. "Because I have to entertain myself somehow.”

“Cause it’s fun and Royboy lets him?” Jaden quipped at the same time as she wiggled around to lean against the headboard of Al’s bed.

Ed smirked at her. "Besides, Al, you know Mustang would start to wonder what was wrong if I obeyed his every order and didn't snark back," he drawled.

Jaden nodded wisely and smirked, “He has a point. If Ed started acting like a real underling Roy would think Ed didn’t like him anymore.”

A sudden gleam started in Ed's eyes. "Or it would drive him crazy wondering what I was up to,” he breathed before bursting out in laughter. "I'll have to try that some time."

Jaden started giggling as well, “Complete with the saluting and the Yes siring. It’ll drive him spastic.”

Al just sighed with an "Oh Brother." and shook his head, yet somehow it was apparent he was smiling and enjoying Ed acting like a teen.

Jaden all of a sudden went dead still for a few seconds before starting to cackle, “Oh Man! I just had a truly evil thought, even for me. Hey, Ed remember the stories I mentioned? What if snippets of them started appearing around base? Nothing that would say the names of the people in the fics but enough description that you could definitely tell one was him and the other was male. Would that be too evil?”

Ed looked at her for a second before bursting out laughing, rolling around on the bed. "Oh man! If those got out, his reputation for being a Ladies' Man would be in serious jeopardy!"

“I could probably whip up a snippet or two right now if you’ve pen and paper.” She offered as she continued to grin evilly.

Al looked between the two. "What stories is she talking about, Brother?"

Ed blushed a bright red and hid his face in his hands. "Some twisted stories where apparently Mustang and I are involved the way Hughes and his wife are," confessed the blond.

Jaden snickered, “I even saw one once that had Ed pregnant thanks to an array they didn’t realize they were making. One of those ones where the array in and of itself was safe but some of the lines crossed each other to where they created the symbol for creation. It got used enough times that well……..” She finished with a shrug.

Ed's groan was louder and his ears turned red in embarrassment as Al chuckled. "My brother? Pregnant?" he squeaked before bursting out in his hollow laughter.

The blond alchemist glared at them. "Yeah, yuk it up," muttered, shifting slightly and trying not to tug at the collar of his black tunic.

Jaden giggled and nodded, “Yep. And since the male body isn’t made to carry a baby they had to figure out a safe way to transmute him into a girl. From the way the guys in the fic reacted Ed makes a very pretty girl.”

Moaning as Al started laughing harder, Ed flopped his right arm across his eyes, careful of the weight of the automail and not noticing when the black sleeve rode up to expose the metal wrist.

Al picked up the pillow and dropped it on Ed, causing the other boy to lift his arm up enough to glare at Al. "What was that for?" he asked just as he noticed the exposed wrist and quickly jerked the sleeve back down.

"Didn't want you falling asleep on us, Brother," came the innocent reply.

Jaden just rolled her eyes at the two and settled back to see where the conversation would go next.

Ed pushed himself up on his left elbow to smirk at them. "I'm not gonna fall asleep yet, Al," he purred, gripping the pillow in his right hand. "Not until I make you pay!" With that, he heaved the pillow at Al and struck the armor in the chest, causing Al to fall backwards.

Jaden nearly fell off the bed cackling as she tried to find cover and ammo. She knew there was no such thing as an innocent bystander in a pillow fight.

"Oh, brother,” Al said in a sing-song voice as he sat up, the pillow in one hand. Ed only cackled and grabbed the pillow off his bed and whacked Al over the head with it, signaling the start of the pillow fight.

Jaden dodged over to the other side of the room and sat on the floor cackling at the two teenagers.

After a few minutes, they stopped and looked at her, a smirk forming on Ed's face as he and Al stood up and started stalking her across the room, pillows held in their hands, ready to be used.

Jaden caught sight of the two and instantly started babbling, “Now, boys, come on. I didn’t take sides and really it was so cute watching you two play like that. I’m not going to talk my way out of this am I?” She asked resignedly as she inched towards the door, hoping to make it before they could pounce.

"Get her!" cried Ed, swinging his pillow at her as he maneuvered to keep her away from the door. Al whooped and swung as well, both brother's mindful of their strength when swinging at her.

“Ack!” Jaden cried as she tried to dodge four ways at once. She managed to dodge Ed’s first swing but got caught on the second. Then a gleam came into her eyes and she turned to the poor, unsuspecting Ed. “Hey Ed?” She said as she tried to dodge Al, not fairing much better.

Ed looked at her, smirking as he herded her away from the door. "Yes, Jaden?" he asked in an innocent voice.

“You ticklish?” She asked just as innocently as she dodged into his swing and went for his ribs.

"Very," supplied Al as Ed started howling with laughter. Ed started thrashing, trying to get away when he swung his automail arm at Jaden. It clanged against Al's arm as the younger brother quickly intercepted the blow, the sound causing both brothers to freeze.

Jaden turned her head and with a deliberate look at where the two arms met said deadpan, “You know, that probably would have hurt just a touch. Thanks, Al. Wouldn’t want to dent the poor guy’s arm after all.”

Ed flushed an embarrassed red and scrambled away, going to stand next to the window and folded his arms across his chest, his shoulders hunched in a clear defensive posture as he glared out the glass.

Jaden thumped her head against the floor a couple of times, “And we were doing so well too. Okay, so you’re part metal. So the flock what?! I knew that when I met you. And please be remembering that I didn’t freak at the little bro here. Sorry Al. At least you’ve got prosthetics that work. Where I’m from we haven’t gotten to your level of controlled movement. They usually have a two to three pronged claw at the end of their arm.”

Al sighed and sat down on the floor next to her. "We're no closer to our goal than we were when we came here," he confessed in a soft voice as Ed deliberately ignored them. "We try to act as normal as possible, but I'm a reminder of what happened as well as his automail."

Jaden crawled over and snuggled as much as she could into Al’s lap, “Yes what happened sucked great big green donkey dick but you’re alive so it’s fixable.” She paused for a moment and thought about the end of the series. “Maybe. If what I saw was anything to go by you two may not want to fix it.”

*That* got Ed's attention. "What do you mean?"

Jaden was still trying to figure out how to work the whole equivalent exchange thing without either brother dying or reality hopping so it took a minute for that to register, “Huh?”

Ed stalked across the room to stand in front of her, glaring down at her with hard amber eyes. "You said that if what you saw was anything to go by we may not want to fix it," he repeated in a hard voice. "Now what did you mean by that?"

“Oh that. Actually you weren’t supposed to hear that.” Jaden muttered sheepishly as she backed up into Al a bit more.

If anything, Ed's glare got harder and colder. Somehow, he managed to make warm amber look like frozen ice. "Tell me now," he ordered in a deadly quiet voice that caused Al to gulp audibly.

Jaden just sighed, “Look I don’t know how close this reality follows the one I know about so I don’t know if what I saw would apply. But think on this, if you guys actually found the Stone what would you use for the equivalent exchange that your alchemy laws say you need? To get Al’s body back you would have to sacrifice a body, probably a living one since *his* body would need to be a living one. A life for a life. That’s the way your alchemy works. So think on that for a bit.”

"To give him his body back, it would be worth the trade," Ed stated but Al shook his head, protesting. "Yes it would, Alphonse. What kind of life are you living now? It's my fault you're this way and if I have to trade my life to give you back yours, it would be worth it!"

“Except then he wouldn’t have his brother. In the reality I saw Al died first to give you your life and limbs. You returned the favor by giving up your life for his. When he returned his was ten years old and had absolutely *no* memories of all this. No alchemy, no armor, and no brother. Oh he knew he had one cause of the pictures but he had no clue what you were like, what your voice sounded like or anything else. When last I saw that Al he was headed off to learn alchemy so he could find Brother.” Jaden nearly growled as she started to get fed up with Ed’s nobility complex.

All color seemed to drain out of Ed's face as he sat down on the floor, hard, as his legs decided to stop supporting his weight.

“Besides have you ever once stopped to ask Al how he felt about all this now that he’s used to it? He’s nearly indestructible and when he does get damaged it’s a couple of bolts here, a little welding there and boom good as new. Nobility’s get as long as you keep it to yourself and don’t let it start making decisions for everyone,” She continued trying to drill exactly what Ed was trying to do into his head from Al’s point of view so the little twerp would actually think.

Al looked at Ed. "I don't want a body back, Brother," he whispered. "Not if it means forgetting you."

Al turned to look at Jaden. "I don't mind what I am now, but I miss things, normal things, like being able to feel someone hand in mine or taste a good steak.”

Jaden thumped her head back against Al’s chest, making it echo and causing her to giggle slightly, “What this world needs is some electronics.” Then she slapped her forehead in a classic duh move. “Or a Mary-Sue with a really big heart. Yo! PTBs! Care to help a poor natural blonde dig herself out of one hell of a moment?”

{WHATCHA NEED?}

“Al needs a body. Either like Data post emotion chip or a real one if you can swing it. Same age he is now with all memories etc. still there. And if you can swing Ed getting his arm and leg back if he wants that’d be nice too.” Jaden chirped at the ceiling.

Ed shook his head. "Just give Al back his body,' he said. "I can live with the automail."

"But, Brother.." began Al only to be cut off by Ed.

"Look, too many people know that I've got automail," he explained. "Not that many people know you're only a suit of armor. If I suddenly get my limbs back, what will people automatically jump to as a conclusion?"

Al sighed and hung his head. "Human transformation," he sighed again.

Ed nodded. "Which last time I checked, was illegal by the Alchemy standards."

“Gotcha. At least this way you get to keep the nifty weapons,” Jaden offered as she tried to cheer the two brothers up.

Ed nodded and glanced at Al. "If you can keep the armor too, then you could sorta 'emerge' now that things have settled down for us and only a handful of people would know differently."

Jaden looked back up at the ceiling, “Well, guys?”

{GIVE US A MINUTE TO GET THIS DONE. WE'RE GONNA BE GRABBING A FEW PEOPLE AND DROPPING THEM IN ON YOU TO TALK ABOUT THIS SO THAT WAY THEY DON'T SPILL THE BEANS.}

“Oh joy. Incoming.” Jaden squawked as she tried to figure out who was going to land where so that she didn’t get squished.

A few minutes later. {OKAY, AL, STAND UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROOM.} Al did as directed and there was a brief glow and a yelp that was distinctly *not* hollow. The armor then fell apart to reveal a lanky boy a few inches taller than Ed with eyes a shade darker than his brother's and pale gold hair down around his waist.

“Ummmm, pretty,” Jaden purred with a grin.

There were a series of pops as Roy, Hawkeye, Hughes, and Armstrong appeared in the corner of the room, looking around confused before their gazes fell on the boy standing in the middle of the armor, clad in a pair of pants and his hair.

"Alphonse?" gasped Armstrong. "But how?"

“My doing.” Jaden piped up before anyone got the wrong idea. “I know some people and asked them to help. See, if the guys had kept after the Stone they would have both died so I kinda put my foot down.”

Roy nodded slowly. "I'm assuming you're talking about the Law of Equivalent Trade here. A life for a life?"

“Exactly. Al made the sacrifice first but Ed couldn’t live with that fact so he turned around and did the same thing.” Jaden reported. Then she remembered earlier and looked at Hughes. “And you need to pull your spies in that last section you sent Ed and Al to. They nearly died cause that town *hates* alchemists with a fiery purple passion. So either your spies are tired or someone’s trying to use you guys to kill the boys through incomplete intel.”

Hughes frowned. "It has to be the second one, because the guys I sent there have always given good intel in the past," he remarked, thinking out loud. "But who would be trying to kill Ed and Al?"

Jaden shrugged, “In the reality I saw it was the Fuhrer. He was a Homunculus. The real Fuhrer had been killed a while back and his skull kept in a safe behind a false bookcase in the library of his house.”

Roy shook his head. "I don't think the Fuhrer is a Homunculus. And I don't think he wants the boys killed. He acts more like they're a special project that he can't quite decide if he wants to finish and risk loosing his hobby."

“Uh. Well, that blows that idea. Maybe that part of the story happens later.” Jaden drifted off into thought for a bit but jerked herself back with a shake. “Anyway, in that case I have no clue. But it’s got to be someone high enough up to waylay the reports before they get to you guys. And it’s not like it matter’s anyway. The boys got what they wanted so they don’t need the Stone anymore.”

"But if they stop chasing it, someone will figure out that something happened," pointed out Hawkeye with a frown. "Maybe even the person who's waylaying the intel reports.”

"Maybe instead of braking it off, cold turkey, they just sorta slowed down until they gave up?" offered Hughes with a shrug.

Jaden turned and looked at the brothers, “What do you guys think?”

Ed nodded and glanced at Al, who was securely wrapped in his older brother's arms. "Sounds like a plan, wouldn't you say, Al?"

Al nodded. "What do we tell Winry and Aunt Pinako?"

“You pissed off the right God?” Jaden snarked with a grin.

That got a few chuckles from the military but Ed and Al rolled their eyes, looking almost like twins. "We'll probably have to tell them the truth and hope they believe us," muttered Ed, stroking Al's long hair. He glanced at the military. "And I gotta wonder if anyone's gonna start screaming about human transformations now."

“Well, if you need me to I think I can swing staying here long enough to be proof to Winry and Pinako. As the for the other……?” Jaden turned to the military in the room and raised an eyebrow while glaring. “They’re not going to upset this happiest of days for you two, are they?” She growled.

"Why should I?" asked Roy with a shrug. "It wasn't human transformation." He smirked. "It was an Act of God."

Jaden couldn’t help herself. She hopped up, darted over to him and patted him on the head. “Good boy. You can be taught.” Then she went and hid behind the Elric brothers.

Hughes and Hawkeye smothered there snickers behind their hands while Roy just sniffed and folded his arms across his chest. "I think that in light of the recent development regarding our intel, you boys should stay somewhere safer than the barracks." He smirked, his dark eyes twinkling. "The only question is where to send you?"

Ed glared at Roy. "We don't need some adult to watch over us," he growled. "We're perfectly capable of taking care of ourselves."

Jaden sighed, “If it wasn’t for the fact that they need to stay in this reality I’d offer a spot traveling with me. And of course you don’t need an adult. You two have been doing just fine by yourselves for a while now. And if Mustang tries it I’ll just write steamier than originally planned.”

That got a laugh out of the boys even as Roy sighed. "I know you can take care of yourselves, but considering that whomever is after you is apparently well placed in the military, right now, you two need some back up."

“That isn’t military. Again if I can swing it I’ll stay as long as I can. I’m not military, or even a citizen of this country so the only loyalty I would have would be to these two. And since we don’t know where the leak is the less you know from now on the better off we’ll be,” Jaden replied as she rested her chin on Al’s shoulder.

Roy sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "That leaves out taking them home with any of us," he grumbled and the other three shook their heads, not having any idea where to send the boys that weren't military.

“Oh hell. Let me try something,” Jaden muttered as she watched the military be their usually clueless self. “Hey, PTBs! Can we bring these guys back after whoever’s trying to kill them goes away. Or hell, does this reality even need their Ed and Al?”

Hawkeye smiled softly. "We'll miss you if you go," she said, jerking her thumb at Roy. "You keep him on his toes."

{IF YOU BOYS WANNA GO WITH JADEN FOR A WHILE, IT CAN BE DONE. BUT DO YOU HAVE A REASON TO COME BACK HERE?}

Jaden grinned at the uniforms while the boys thought and chirped in a little kid’s voice. “Can I keep them? Huh? Huh? Huh? I promise to love them, and squeeze them and call them Ed and Al. And… and… and… I’ll take them for walks and feed them. So can I? Pweeeeeease?!”

That cracked up Hughes and Hawkeye who sobered a few minutes later. "Well, boys? Do you want to come back?"

Ed looked right at Roy. "I don't know. Do we have a reason to come back? I know I'll miss Winry and Aunt Pinako, but I don't really have anything holding me here except Al."

Jaden just rested her head on Al’s shoulder and only slightly pulled out the puppy dog eyes.

Roy sighed and leaned against the wall behind him. "I don't know what you want me to say, Edward," he said. "Yes I want you to stay because you do keep me on my toes and you make my life interesting." He shrugged and spread his hands, indicating that he really didn't know what to say.

Jaden grinned evilly, “I could probably arrange for the stories to be at your place if you want and it would make you feel better.”

Roy looked at her, his eyes narrowing slightly as Ed and Al snickered. "Stories? What stories?"

Jaden just blinked and smiled innocently as she cuddled back against the boys.

{OKAY BEFORE ANYTHING ELSE, A FEW THINGS. ED, YOUR AUTOMAIL WON'T BREAK NOW AND WILL GROW WITH YOU LIKE REAL LIMBS. THAT WAY IF YOU DECIDE NOT TO COME BACK THEN YOU WON'T BE HURTING IF SOMETHING HAPPENS. SECOND, NO MATTER WHERE YOU TWO GO, YOUR ALCHEMY WILL WORK FOR YOU.}

“Rock on. I didn’t even think of that,” Jaden chirped happily.

Everyone looked up at the voice that as a disappointed look flashed over Roy's face. "Looks like you have no reason to come back."

“Hey Ed?” Jaden queried.

Ed looked at Jaden, still a bit confused.

“Should we leave Roy a parting gift since he’ll seem to miss you?” Jaden teased with a mischievous grin.

Ed blinked again before smirking. "Sure," he purred. "Let me grab my coat and pack real quick and we can get going." Before he could move, two suitcases appeared at his feet, one labeled "Ed" and the other labeled "Al". The one with Ed's name on it had his red coat draped over it.

Jaden fell over cackling, “Gotta love impatient PTBs. Hey, Roy when you get home there should be some very interesting reading on your bedroom nightstand. Have fun.”

{WHERE'D YOU LIKE TO GO NEXT, JADEN? ANY SPECIAL PLACE IN MIND?}

“Not a clue. Ya’ll are runnin’ this show remember?” Jaden drawled as she stood up and helped the boys up.

The air shimmered around the three and their bags before clearing, leaving them standing in a library with a cage filled with weapons in one corner and an older gentleman looking at them in surprise with his glasses in one hand and a book in the other.

“Hi, Giles. What’s up?” Jaden chirped happily as she glanced around.

"This is really most unusual," he muttered, lowering the book and slipping his glasses back on as he studied them. "You don't appear to be demonic..." He blinked at the greeting. "Were you sent by the Council for some reason?"

“Nope. I’m a wandering Mary-Sue. Name’s Jaden. These two are Ed and Al Elric, they’re alchemists who came with me cause their home fandom isn’t to safe for them at the moment,” Jaden introduced as she gestured to herself and the brothers respectively.

"Ah, yes, I see," remarked Giles just as the library doors opened to admit three teenagers, a blond girl, a red haired girl and a brunette boy.

"What's up, G-Man?" greeted the boy.

Giles sighed. "How many times have I asked you not to call me that, Xander," he began only to be interrupted by the blond.

"Who's the new arrivals?"

Jaden just wiggled her fingers in a wave and grinned as she moved closer to the brothers.

The redhead peeked at them and a smile spread across her face. "Oh, you're so cute! But why are you here? Aren't you a bit young to help us?"

Ed growled low in his throat, and clenched his fists as he took a step forward.

Jaden sighed as she reached out and grabbed the back of Ed’s collar, “Down, boy. You’ll have to excuse him. The quickest way on earth to piss him off is to either mention his height or his youthful looks. He’s actually about 15 while the other one’s 14. So what’s the what?”

The brunette boy grinned in a charming manner as he hopped up to sit on the table. "Trying to figure out the major Apocalypse of the season and what we can do to stop it," he drawled with a shrug. "All we know is it's got something to do with the Mayor and he's probably shooting for spring since that's when all the major ones happen."

“Tell me we either haven’t met Faith or she’s not working with the Mayor,” Jaden begged as she turned and carefully banged her head on Al’s shoulder.

"Is that where little Miss Want Take Have has been vanishing to?" inquired the blonde, cracking her knuckles as she glanced at Giles. "I think it's time for me and her to have a talk."

"Now Buffy," sighed Giles, taking off his glasses to clean them, sounding like a parent talking to their errant child about an old subject.

“Le sigh. Okay, we got dropped in third season. Good in that I don’t have to put up with Angelus bad because of what the Mayor’s trying to pull. Buffy you cool your jets. I’ll go see if I can talk some sense into Faith. She’s had a seriously messed up life from the get go and you people haven’t helped any.” Jaden paused as she remembered who else was supposed to be there. “Whine. Don’t tell me we have to put up with Wesley?”

Giles sighed. "I'm not sure where Wesley is," he confessed. "Though I do believe he was called back to England for some reason. As for Faith, we are actually expecting her..." Just then, the doors opened again to admit a brunette girl in painted on leather. "Ah, Faith, just in time."

Faith grinned and popped her gum. "I'm five by five, Giles. What are we talking about tonight?" She stopped and grinned at the three new arrivals. "Cute kids, lady. They yours?"

Growling louder now, Ed shrugged out of Jaden's grip and stalked over to her, his boots making a solid thunk on the floor with each step even though the left foot sounded a bit louder than the right. He got right in faith's face, burning gold meeting amused brown. "Let's get one thing straight right here. The only one in this damn room that's related to me is my brother, but I'm the one you gotta watch out for." He smirked. "Human transformation may be illegal, but simple alchemy leaves me plenty of ways for revenge."

Jaden sighed again and started rubbing her forehead, “I forgot everybody and their uncle had a death wish in this fandom. And don’t say the W word, Jaden! You know better,” she grumbled to herself. “I decided they needed to learn how to flirt before I turned them back over to their fandom. And no you can’t help. Don’t see why you call them kids anyway, you’re not much older than they are. Any of you,” she added.

Faith snorted and looked at Jaden as she jerked a thumb at Ed. "Sorry, not buying it. No way shortie here can be anything more than ten."

“No that’s when he got the metal arm and leg trying to save his mom from dying. It didn’t work. He’s fifteen and his brother’s fourteen. And you and I are going to go have a talk *right* now,” Jaden snapped as she got sick of the attitudes in the room.

Al squeaked and uprighted a table to duck behind. "Don't hurt her too badly, Brother," he cried covering his head behind the table as he waited for the fireworks to start.

A snarl twisted Ed's face as he grabbed Faith suddenly and flipped her over his shoulder, causing her to crash to the floor. Then in a strange jumping twist, he landed on her, his legs pinning her arms to her side as he buried his automail fist into the wood next to her head. "Let's get one thing straight," he growled. "I'm not a kid. Despite how 'cute' or 'young' I look, I can take care of both my brother and I. We don't need anyone to help us." He raised burning golden eyes to stare at the rest of the room. "Got that?"

“And that dear friends and neighbors is why you don’t piss him off. That hand could have been a blade just as easily,” Jaden intoned calmly as she crossed her arms over her chest and leaned back against the check-out counter.

Xander spoke up. "What do you mean that hand could have been a blade?" he asked, slightly curious.

Ed slowly stood up and unzipped his black tunic, shrugging it off and removing his gloves with it, leaving him clad in his leather pants and his black tank top, exposing the automail arm.

Jaden just stayed were she was wondering what was going to happen next.

"So your leg's metal too?" asked Xander, hopping off the table to get a closer look.

Ed blinked at looked at him, a bit surprised but nodded. "Yeah, my left leg from about mid thigh down." He shrugged and scooped up his tunic/jacket. "I tried something that was forbidden, but I thought it didn't apply to me. Al, at least, was able to recover if only just recently."

Walking over to the table, he grinned at Al who was emerging from behind it, grabbed the bottom of the table and tipped it upright with his automail arm.

"So how could it be a blade?" inquired Buffy. "Do you have a spring loaded blade in there?"

While everyone else was gathering around the pair of alchemists, Jaden grabbed Faith by the arm and hauled her into Giles’ office.

Faith yelped and stumbled after Jaden to glare at the woman. "What crawled up your ass and died?" she snarled.

“Look. I don’t care about what has already happened but if you’re working for the Mayor, knock it off. Cause let me tell ya, you ain’t going to be comin’ up roses by the end of it,” Jaden started with as she shut the door.

Faith snorted and folded her arms. "What are you talking about?" she demanded. "He's the only one in this rat hole that gives a shit about me."

“Wrong! He gives a shit about having a pet Slayer. And yes Giles needs to be beaten with an ax handle for not realizing that you’re completely on your own but the rest of them aren’t any older than you. Of course they’re not going to think of things like that,” Jaden snapped as she copied Faith’s body posture.

Faith sneered. "Like Golden Girl and her Posse out there care anything about me. I don't see any invites to join their perfect little worlds or even to stop by for dinner. I've been on my own for almost my entire life. I can take care of myself." She pointed a finger at Jaden. "And you're wrong about the Mayor. He's the only one in this shit hole that's ever asked how I was doing or even what my plans were for later."

Jaden snorted, “That’s cause they’re brain dead teenagers and Buffy’s such a handful by herself I’m amazed Giles knows which way is up most mornings. Tell ya what, if you can tone down the attitude I can introduce you to Joyce, she’s Buffy’s mom and the freakin’ den mother to the whole crew, what with Xander’s parents drunk more often than not and Willow’s parents never home. Joyce will take you in as long as you’re nice to her. I mean hell she took in a drunk Spike one night and gave him hot chocolate and listened to him rant about Dru leaving him.”

That took Faith back. "But would Golden Girl there really be willing to share her mom with me?" she asked in a small voice.

“She will be if she wants to keep her head attached. Here let me call Joyce and explain things to her. If we get to her before Buffy does you’re half way there,” Jaden said as she started riffling through Giles desk looking for his address book. With a short “ha” of success she found it and started flipping through it, finally finding the number she wanted and calling it.

"Art Gallery, now may I help you?" greeted a pleasant voice.

“Hi, Mrs. Summers. You don’t know me but I’m a friend of your daughter. My name’s Jaden. I stumbled across another friend of hers who seems to be in need of some help,” Jaden chirped as she just figured out that she had *no* clue what she was going to say.

"Oh? What kind of friend? Is it another one like that Angel person?" Joyce inquired, her tone a bit cautious as well as curious.

“Nope. We are both of the pulse having and informed of the nightlife around here. That’s one reason Faith, that’s the other friend, here needs help. See she’s in the same line of business as Buffy but right now she’s out at that fleabag pay by the hour notel that I wouldn’t let a rabid dog stay in. I don’t want to send her home with Xander cause I don’t trust those pickled things trying to pass themselves off as his parents and Willow’s are never home. And as you can imagine letting Mr. Giles take her in….,” Jaden trailed off as she held her breath a bit.

"Why didn't Buffy say anything earlier about Faith?" asked Joyce in a motherly tone. "Of *course* she can stay with us." There was a sigh. "Or was Buffy being her sometimes unobservant self?"

“Buffy was being her usual clueless self I’m afraid. She’s a teenager, what can you do?” Jaden said with a bit of amusement in her voice.

"True. I just wish there was more I could do for Xander and Willow," sighed Joyce. "But I can't do anything in this town to help them other than what I'm doing now."

“And for them that’s enough. The only reason I brought up Faith at all was because of where she was staying and the fact that she’s from Boston and therefore a long way from home. So do you want her to swing by the Gallery now or just wait for Buffy to remember she has a home that doesn’t include ten thousand books?” Jaden joked as she glanced over to see Faith’s reaction.

Faith was staring at Jaden as if she was hearing things, not wanting to believe the part of the conversation that she could hear.

"Send her over now with her things," instructed Joyce. "I'll close the Gallery now and meet her at my home. I need to air out the spare room anyway."

“Okay. Thank you so much for this. Oh, little bitty warning, she hasn’t really had a sunshine and roses kinda life so she has a bit of the I’m to tough to give a care attitude,” Jaden turned as she whispered that part so that Faith wouldn’t get defensive.

Joyce laughed. "I'll try not to mother her too much," she agreed.

“Rock on. You are officially the coolest mother on the planet. Okay, I’ll go with her to help with the packing and lead her over to your place. Heck, maybe I can drag the whole gaggle over so that you can see your daughter’s alive,” Jaden snarked as she turned back to Faith and gave her a thumb’s up.

Faith looked like someone had just handed her a bag filled with cash and told "Here, no strings."

Joyce laughed again. "Tell her not to work too hard when you gather them up, Jaden,” she stated. "I’ll see you in what, half an hour?"

“Sounds good. Be prepared to be invaded Madame. Bye.” Jaden wisecracked with a laugh as she hung up the phone.

"She's really going to take me in?" Faith asked in a small voice as if afraid that she was going to be told "Ha Ha. Just kidding." any minute now.

“Yep. Said we need to go get your stuff and then meet her at her place. I told you Joyce is like the Goddess of den mothers around here. If she thought there was a way to do it she’d take in Xander and Willow too. Now that’s that settled you willing to leave the Mayor cause if he wins Joyce is dead,” Jaden explained as she headed towards the door.

*In the outer room during Jaden and Faith’s talk*

Ed shook his head and smirked. "I use alchemy to reform some of the metal into a blade," he explained, pointing to the large plate that made up the back of his arm.

Willow frowned. "But surely that can't be helpful in the middle of a battle," she protested. "Most baddies won't give you time to stop, do your alchemy to create a weapon and then start the fight again."

"My brother's special," piped up Al, a huge grin on his face. "He can do alchemy without an array."

"What's an array?" asked Buffy, frowning and Ed sighed.

"Do you have anything broken that you need fixed or something you want turned into something else, like a sword made into an ax?" he asked and Giles moved over to the cage, searching through the weapons before coming out with a busted crossbow and a sword that looked like it had been bent by a pair of strong hands.

Ed grinned at Al and grabbed a piece of chalk from off of the counter, tossing it to his younger brother. "An array is what an alchemist uses to transmute one item into another, such as a broken crossbow into a working one," he began as Al started drawing a simple array on the floor with the chalk. "However, when an alchemist creates something, another thing of equal value must be sacrificed. That is the Law of Equivalent Trade. It is a rule that *cannot* be broken for any reason."

"How come that rule can't be broken?" inquired Willow, watching with mesmerized eyes as Al placed the crossbow in the center of the array.

Ed shrugged. "You can't make something out of nothing. It just won't work." Al placed his hands on the edge of the array and closed his eyes in concentration. The array started glowing with a white light and when it faded a few seconds later, a whole working crossbow sat on the clean, bare floor.

"That is alchemy with an array. Almost all alchemists need an array of one form or another," remarked Ed, smirking at their startled exclamations as he scooped up the sword and placed it on the table. "I have a slight advantage in this area." Clapping his hands, he tapped into whatever it was that made him an alchemist and reached out his hands, covered in blue lightning. The lightning danced over the sword, causing it to glow an eerie blue before it faded, leaving a perfectly good sword behind.

*Back in the office*

Faith nodded, still numb. "He didn't tell me that. Just wanted me to do some jobs for himand he was interested in gossip is all," she explained as she followed Jaden out of the office to find Buffy holding a sword and staring at it as if she had never seen it before.

“The Mayor wants to turn in to a 50 foot snake demon and eat the graduating class and everyone else attending the ceremony,” Jaden was heard rattling off as she went over to her boys, and after checking for arrays, hopped up on the table and started swinging her legs.

*That* announcement got everyone's attention, although it was a curious look from the Elrics.

"That's his plan?" asked Buffy in disbelief as Giles suddenly started swearing. "Oh Gods Above and Below. An Ascension," he breathed, his eyes huge.

“Yep. Has a big box of funky spider like things passed through here recently?” Jaden chirped as she nodded.

"There was that one box that seemed to rattle a lot but the Troll said that they were rats for a science class," explained Willow with a frown.

“It probably was. This would have been a big black box with cast iron work on it and possibly chittering sounds coming from it. Oh and here in a minute we need to head out,” Jaden reported as she nodded for the boys to get their bags.

"So what are those funky spider things for? And where are we going?" asked Xander with a goofy grin as Al and Ed scooped up their bags, Ed slipping his tunic back on and pulling on his gloves.

“The spiders are for the Mayor to eat so that for the 100 days before his ascension he’s invincible. And we’re going to that rape a date motel, getting Faith’s stuff from there and going to Buffy’s so that Joyce can meet Faith and get her settled,” She babbled as she led the way out of the library, hoping Buffy was her usual slow on the uptake self.

Ed frowned as he thought. "Do you know if he's eaten those things?" he asked with a shudder at the thought of eating spiders even as he followed her out the door with the rest of them. He smirked. "If not, get me close to that box and I can promise that he'll never get it open without a blowtorch."

“Haven’t a clue. That’s the reason I asked if any of them had seen it,” Jaden said with a shrug. “I think it came in on a plane though.”

Willow shook her head. "No the box Snyder had was a wooden crate. A big crate like Indiana Jones-big," she explained before looking around almost expecting Snyder to pop out and grab them.

Jaden shook her head decisively, “Nope not them then. What about a demon with a batch of books on ascension willing to sell them to the highest bidder? Seen him?”

Giles sighed. "I think he came through last week. I heard about the auction but could only wish to participate. The Council refused to make any fund available to purchase the books."

Jaden sighed as well as they made it outside, “Damn! Oh well, at least he lived this time. Okay so the Mayor’s got the books of ascension but not the spiders that we know of and we don’t have to put up with Wesley. At least we got some small favors.” She cracked as she turned and looked at Faith. “Okay, Boss. Which way?”

Silently, Faith started down the road towards the roach motel where she'd been staying. They made it about halfway there when Buffy screeched. "Waitaminute! What do you mean Mom's gonna get her settled?" she demanded. "Settled where?"

“Ahhh. The mouse finally woke up and started running again.” Jaden snarked just loud enough for Faith and the Elric brothers to hear, since they were the closest to her. “Your Mom offered that spare room for Faith to stay in once I told her about where she had been staying. She agreed with me that any place run by someone who thought a 16 year old girl should have to pay for her room with her body is not place worth allowing to exist. Since we can’t bomb it she said Faith was moving in,” Jaden continued loud enough to carry.

Faith glared at Jaden. "Wasn't paying for it on my back," she grumbled. "The Mayor was giving me money to pay the rent."

“I know that. But I also know for a fact that the owner tried to make you anyway. Personally I would have broken his dick for him so that he wouldn’t contaminate the gene pool, but that’s just me,” Jaden reassured with an evil grin and a pat on the shoulder.

Faith smirked back. "Happen to know a vampire that got a meal that night,” she sighed in mock sadness. "Just a bit to slow since I was dealing with the vamp's buddies."

“Awww damn. Such a shame, really,” Jaden joined in as she wiped away an imaginary tear.

"So where are we going after picking up your stuff, Miss Faith?" asked Al, his suitcase in one hand and Ed's red coat over the jeans he wore. Sometime in the library, he had put on a pair of tennis shoes, but that was all he wore.

Faith snorted. "It's just Faith, no miss there,” she replied. "And B's mom has offered me her spare room to crash in."

"That's really nice of Mrs. Summers,” piped up Willow, a huge smile on her face before she glanced around. "Um, not to sound scared or anything, but could we maybe walk a bit faster? It's starting to get dark out."

Ed looked at her. "What's wrong with it getting dark?"

Jaden answered for her, “Oh you know the usual. Vampires, demons gangs on PCP.”

Ed snorted as Al gripped his hand a bit tighter. "Vampires?" he asked, disbelief clear in his voice.

Faith grinned. "Yep. Vampires, and B and I are the girls destined to fight the evil of the night, blah blah blah."

“Actually with the way things work around here we should be running into a group of vampires fairly soon,” Jaden snarked as she glanced around.

"Maybe they'll wait until after we hit the roach motel,” joked Xander with a grin. "Then we won't have as far to run when they attack."

Ed snorted. "I don't scare easily and I don't run either."

"Not unless it's the only option, Brother," remarked Al in a firm voice.

Jaden snorted, “They’ll probably wait until we hit the room then try to corner us in there. Since it’s a motel there’s no invite rule.”

Faith grinned and started bouncing a bit more while Buffy just sighed and dug a stake out of her oversized purse.

Xander and Willow both pulled out squirt guns from their backpacks and Willow grabbed a couple of stakes that were in hers, skipping forward slightly to hand one to Jaden and Faith. "Here, you might need these," she offered.

Jaden took her stake with a nod of thanks and turned to the brothers and said, “Vampire Killing 101. A.) They are *not* human! They are walking corpses that look and act human. B.) Wood through the heart, taking off of the head, and sunlight will kill them. C.) Holy items such as crosses and blessed water act like acid so get them in the face if you can, otherwise you’ll just piss them off. Anything else?” She asked as she turned to the locals.

Giles took off his glasses to polish them again. "Um, no, that seems to be the gist of it," he stuttered, thrown slightly off balance by her apparent knowledge and understanding of how things worked.

“Cool. Now can we pick up the pace a bit. I’m bored and a bored Mary-Sue is about a dangerous as a bored Slayer,” Jaden said as she picked up her own pace.

Faith linked an arm with Jaden. "I think I could get to like you, J," she chortled as they reached the motel. It was the work of seconds for her to toss her clothes in a bag and sling it over her shoulder. "Ready."

“Then lets motorgate,” Jaden chirped as they trooped back out into the night.

They were almost to the Summers house when a gang of vampires descended on them, intent on taking out the slayers. Snarling, Ed formed a two foot blade from his arm and tried to protect his brother as best he could as Faith whooped and dove into the fighting frenzy with a wild smile on her face. Xander and Willow were fighting back to back, squirting water in the faces of any who got near while Buffy was fighting as well.

A vampire lunged at Al only to get an automail foot in his face and the vampire yelped, instinctively clawing at the leather and ripping it to reveal the metal leg.

Jaden stayed back and helped Ed protect Al while shouting, “The head Ed. You have to take off the head or pierce the heart with wood.”

Snarling, Ed tried hard not to get separated from Al. "I'm trying," he growled as a strong hand grabbed his right arm and pulled him away from Al, spinning him away with a ripping of cloth. He was off balance enough that he fell, hitting his head on the sidewalk and lying there, unconscious.

"ED!" screamed Al but before he could move, Faith was there, clearing the way towards Ed and then made sure that none of the vampires got near the fallen boy.

“You know. I could really use my Dueling Deck right about now with the ability to call anybody I needed,” Jaden bitched as she also tried to make her way to the fallen boy, while still having to protect Al.

"B! Watch Red and Xan!" shouted Faith, unable to move from where she was even as she saw the vampire trying to sneak up on the other two. Buffy wasn't paying any attention so Faith tossed her stake, nailing the vampire in the chest, and found herself going bare handed against the next vampire.

"Don't these things have anything else to do?" growled Xander, trying to conserve his water and aiming for only sure shots.

Just then, a pale blur appeared out of the darkness and the vampires started falling faster until there wasn't any left. The new arrival wore a long black trench coat and had slicked back bleached blond hair.

Jaden just blinked for a second before chirping cheerfully, “Hiya, Spike! What’s up?”

Spike turned at looked at Jaden curiously. "Haven't seen ya in a while, pet. Whatcha doin' hangin' out with this crew?" he asked, lighting a cigarette and stalking over to Jaden, causing Al to squeak before scuttering around Spike to check on his brother.

“Oh you know how it is. PTBs decide where I go and all that jazz. Picked me up a new pair of toys though. Aren’t they yummy?” Jaden quipped with a grin and a gesture at the brothers.

Al knelt next to Ed and carefully ran his hands over his brother, checking for sprains or breaks. "Brother? Can you hear me?" he asked, hoping to get a response. Faith knelt down and scooped Ed up so his automail arm was dangling with the blade pointed down. "We'd better get you inside for some mothering before someone else decides to see what's what."

"Hey Spike. We are still in Sunnyhell right?” Jaden asked nervously.

Spike glanced over at the boys and dropped an arm around Jaden's shoulders. "Bit young for ya, aren't they pet?" he asked in a soft voice. He wasn't sure what kind of person would carry a 2 foot long blade strapped to their arm, but that little one did. He grinned at Jaden. "Yeah, luv, an' Tall, Dark and Delicious there did just jinx ya."

Jaden whimpered. “I’m just training them until it’s safe for them to go back to their own fandom. Neither one of them knows how to flirt. Hell, Ed didn’t even know what UST meant and he’s fifteen,” Jaden informed the vampire as she leaned on him a little.

Spike sighed and shook his head in mock sadness. "Pity,” he purred. "Think I could help ya train 'em? I promise not ta break yer pretties." The group was moving towards the Summers' house again at a faster pace with Faith and Ed in the middle with Al walking close by, both suitcases in his hands.

“As long as you don’t scare them or mention anything about Ed’s height or how young he looks. Poor guy gets nothing but razzin’ about those,” Jaden agreed then quickly added. “And only flirting, nothing else. Ed’s got someone back home if both of them would pull their heads out of their asses.”

"Damn." sighed Spike with a leer. "Sure I can't introduce 'em to a bit more of the fun stuff?"

Faith smirked over her shoulder. "If you wanna get your rocks of, Fangs, I'll take you on," she challenged.

Jaden nearly toppled herself and Spike as she burst into giggles. Once she had calmed down she replied to Spike’s question. “Yes I’m sure. I’m not even sure either one’s even been kissed and Al there is actually younger than Ed. It’s only by a year but you get my point.”

Buffy glared at them. "I can't believe you would even suggest a thing!" she exclaimed. "Having Spike get near them now is bad enough but that?" She shuddered, expressing her disgust at the idea.

Al sighed and looked at her. "We're old enough to make our own decisions," he replied in a firm voice as steel crept into his gaze.

“Besides it’s not your life so butt out Miss I-Slept-With-Someone-230-Years-My-Senior. You’ve got no place to throw stones,” Jaden snapped.

A humiliated flush stole over Buffy's face as Al glanced back at Spike. "Perhaps we can talk later?" invited the young teen, his face open and curious. "I have many questions to ask you."

Spike smirked. "Sure, Nibblet. Be happy ta talk with ya."

The porch light was on when they arrived and as soon as they climbed the stairs to the porch, Joyce opened the door silently ushering them in and she offered a small smile to Spike. "Spike, do you promise not to eat anyone under my roof?" she asked, stopping him with a hand on his chest.

Spike grinned. "Yes ma'am," he agreed. "I promise not ta eat anyone under yer roof."

“Better switch that to anyone living under your roof or their friends or he’ll take a nibble just cause,” Jaden piped up with a giggle.

Joyce smirked and let Spike in. "He knows better than to lie to me, and everyone here is under my roof." She looked at the vampire with a mother's glare. "Right, Spike?"

"Yes, mum," he agreed, ducking his head like an errant school boy. Joyce nodded and motioned for Faith to put Ed down on the couch.

"What happened to him?" she asked before glancing around. "Willow, could you get me some ice from the freezer and put it in a washcloth? Buffy, the first aid kits in the bathroom."

Al knelt next to the couch and took his brother's hand in his. "One of those vampires tossed him aside and he hit his head," explained the younger brother, carefully lifting the automail arm with the blade still visible and positioning it so it wouldn't accidentally stab someone.

Jaden nodded from her out of the way corner, “Yep we finally found the one thing that’s harder than Ed’ head. A Sunnydale sidewalk. But that’s okay, he put up a hella fight before it happened.”

Joyce tutted and crouched down next to the couch. "Is there any way to put that blade away?" she asked. "And can we take his shirt off to check for any other injuries?"

Al looked up at her with golden eyes. "He'll be able to transmute it back when he wakes up," he replied. "And he's a bit shy about being seen without long sleeves."

Jaden caught Al’s eye, “Can I tell her as long as I don’t go into detail?”

Al nodded and grabbed the throw off the back of the couch, spreading it over his brother as Buffy and Willow both returned with their fetched items.

Jaden sighed and leaned back against the wall, crossing her arms as she tried to figure out how to keep it short and sweet. “When Ed was about ten, I think, and Al nine their mother died of a wasting type disease. I don’t think they ever figured out what it was. Anyway, she was the only thing they has so they tried something they weren’t supposed to so they could bring her back. Unfortunately, it didn’t work and Ed lost his right arm and left leg in the process. What he has now is called automail. It works almost exactly like a real limb except for it being metal. When the boys are in danger Ed can transmute his arm into a bladed weapon.”

As Jaden talked, Al carefully removed the torn tunic and then the sleeveless shirt, exposing Ed's torso to the room, and giving everyone a clear view of the massive scars where metal joined flesh. "We just wanted our mother back,” he whispered before looking up at Jaden. "And that was when we tried to bring her back. I was about seven I think when she died." He shook his head. "After her death, that's when we went to find a teacher for alchemy."

Joyce leaned forward and enveloped Al in a tight hug. "You poor boys," she cooed before releasing him to place the ice pack on Ed's head while she cleaned a couple of scrapes he had. Once she was done, she stood up and looked at the rest of them. "Do you have any injuries that need tending?"

Everyone shook their heads and Joyce nodded before smiling at Faith. "Come on. The spare room's got fresh sheets on the bed and there are towels setting out for you."

Joyce and Faith left the room, leaving the group to stand there in an awkward silence as Al kept a quiet watch over his brother. When Joyce returned a few minutes later without Faith, Buffy turned to her mother with a furious expression on her face. "How could you let her stay here?" hissed the blonde only to shrink back at the look on Joyce's face. It was a look that said "I'm the mother and you're going to listen to me or regret it, young lady."

"Why didn't you *tell* me that one of your friends was living on their own at that roach motel?" demanded Joyce, her voice hard. "Or were you only concerned about yourself to notice the trouble your other friends were in?"

Joyce turned a motherly smile on Willow and Xander, both of whom had flinched at her accusation. "I don't expect you two to be the sole support and I wish I could do more for you, but I do understand why you didn't invite Faith into your homes."

Jaden just scooted around to where she was by Ed and Al, that way if Buffy went flying into one of her famous snits all they’d have to do is tip the couch back and have instant cover.

Buffy glared at Joyce. "She's working for the Mayor! You know that guy who wants to turn the graduating class into an all he can eat buffet once he turns into a huge snake?"

"A demon ascension? Is *that* what the wanker's plannin?" demanded spike with a shake of his head. "Some idiots never learn."

“And actually no she’s not. At least not now. The only reason she went to him to begin with was because no one in this god accursed town gave *DAMN* about if she lived or died! All of you knew she had just come in from Boston after being force to watch her Watcher be tortured and raped to death. Hell, she’s never said but I bet her Watcher wasn’t the only one that had to suffer through it. And instead of seeing about finding some place decent for her to stay you just ignore her. And yes, Giles, half of this is one your head. You are a Watcher, your job is to make sure that *any* Slayer has what she needs to survive as long as possible. Having to fend off rapists night isn’t it!” Jaden ranted as she glared between Giles and Buffy. “You ain’t God little girl. You’re a grunt and that’s all you’ll ever be and since the Slayer line comes off Faith now you’re expendable.”

Buffy turned an alarming shade of red while Giles sank down into a nearby chair, looking like an old man. "I wished I had seen it," he confessed. "But with Wesley vanishing and trying to make sure Buffy continued doing her job. Faith acted just fine and if you hadn't told me of her actions, I don't think I would have even known."

“That’s because Faith has spent her entire life snowing social workers and the like. Same as Xander and Willow,” Jaden snapped a bit more quietly.

"In a way, she's tough and a bit intimidating," confessed Willow in a small voice. "A..and I don't know how to help her since we've been busy trying to help Buffy." She ducked her head, hiding behind her hair as Xander wrapped a comforting arm around her shoulders.

Xander shook his head. "There's no way she could have come home with either of us," he added. "If she came home with me, she'd had to deal with the drunk morons, and going home with Willow is like going home to a mausoleum."

“Truthfully I wasn’t really expecting you two to try to take up with her. Buffy was the first person that hadn’t been raised with you to try and make friends. That kind of thing builds loyalty that God would have hell shaking. Trust me I know. But I at least expected Xander to try jabber slathering boy talk at her.” Jaden reassured with a grin at Xander.

Xander rubbed the back of his neck, embarrassed. "Did that, got a grin and a 'You're cute' before she sauntered off to stake another vamp."

“Hey at least you got a “you’re cute” means she thinks of you as something other than a piece of tail. Start trying to just talk to her, she needs to know that not every male in the universe thinks with his dick and just wants in her pants. And, I know this will be hard, if she offers? Turn her down. She’s to used to just screwing and running,” Jaden said gently as she reached over and ruffled his hair.

Just then, there was a quiet moan from the couch as Ed started stirring. Slowly, he sat up, looking around with a confused gaze before he realized that he wasn't wearing anything from his waist up and scowled at the rest of the room, daring them to make a comment about the automail.

“You’re awake! How ya feelin’?” Jaden chirped as she sank down on the edge of the couch.

"Fine," replied Ed even as he winced at the loudness of Jaden's voice. Clapping his hands again, he transmuted the blade back into the metal plate on his arm and swung his legs over the side of the couch only to cradle his head in his hands with a soft moan of pain.

“Uh huh. Right. Where’s the painkillers?” Jaden said much more quietly. She forgot not everyone can handle head pain like herself.

Xander dug into the first aid kit and came up with some aspirine, shaking out two tablets and grabbing a glass of water. "Here, take these. They should help a bit," he offered in a quiet voice as he crouched in front of Ed. Ed blinked in surprise when Xander casually placed the aspirin in his metal hand, acting as if it didn't bother him, before he swallowed the tablets before washing them down with the glass of water.

"Are you hurt anywhere else?" asked Joyce, quietly coming over and picking up Ed's foot, unlacing the boots before slipping them off. Ed yanked his feet away from her once she got his boots off and pulled his knees to his chest, wrapping his arms around his legs, and completely missing the tear in his pants.

"M fine," he mumbled, burying his face in his knees.

“Ed she’s trying to be nice. Don’t make me tickle you into submission. They know the short version of the story and don’t care. And before you scream at me I cleared it with Al first,” Jaden abolished gently as she started petting his hair.

Ed shook his head only to moan at the sudden movement, his skin taking on a greenish tinge and Xander reached out to help him lay back down when Ed flinched at the contact. "You'd better lay back down. It will help with the elephants doing the tango in your head," suggested the brunette teen as he coaxed Ed into laying down again. Ed resisted for a few seconds before allowing Xander to help him back down and Al knelt next to his brother, gently unbraiding the golden hair.

“Question: Did any of us think to check him for a concussion?” Jaden chirped quietly as she shifted to Ed’s head and hovered. “Ed I’m going to see what your eyes are doing okay? I just want to make sure they’re acting right.” She explained as she rested her hands gently on each side of his head and just left them there.

Slowly, Ed opened his eyes to stare at her, flinching again as light fell across his face and let out a small sigh of relief when Al placed the make-shift ice pack back on his head.

“Humm, mild concussion but not life threatening. Let’s just let the poor guy sleep it off. Everyone into the kitchen,” Jaden announced as she rested a hand on Al’s shoulder and gave both boys a quick kiss on the forehead. “Since this doesn’t really pertain to you, Al, you can go ahead and stay here if you want.”

Al nodded. "I'll see if I can check him over for more injuries," he whispered as everyone else moved into the kitchen. Once everyone save the brothers and Faith were there, Spike leaned against the door, acting as guard to keep everyone out of the rest of the house, and twisted an unlit cigarette in his fingers, not bothering to reach for his lighter as if the white tube was more of a distraction than a craving.

“Now then Miss Thang, you got anymore whinin’ you want to get out?” Jaden snarked at Buffy as she crossed her arms and leaned against a convenient counter.

Buffy glared at everyone. "So why are we listening to *her* anyway?" she demanded, jerking a thumb at Jaden. "How do we know that she's not deliberately misleading us with this Mayor line while the real apocalypse happens elsewhere?"

“Cause I’m a Mary-Sue, Blondie. That means that I’m not from the universe but I still have a good bit of working knowledge of it. In this case I watched your life from your first day at good ol’ Sunnydale High through the next seven years. Right now we’re in year three which means the Mayor and his BS.” Jaden explained in the semi-patient way one talks to a small child that’s asked ‘why’ one too many times.

Buffy continued glaring at Jaden. "That doesn't prove anything," she retorted.

"What exactly happened to the Anointed Brat?" Spike suddenly asked, causing everyone to glance at him in confusion and he grinned. "If she knows as much as she's sayin', then she knows what happened to him." He raised a finger. "Something that only two people know of an' I'm one of them."

"How do we know you haven't told her?" Buffy demanded, folding her arms across her chest as she glared at Spike who shrugged.

"Why should I have told her," he countered. "Haven't seen her in a couple of years an' that was before Dru an' I showed up here."

“You tossed him into that nifty little hanging cage and hauled it up into some sunlight.” Jaden dutifully reported with a grin, which then turned evil. “But then again you’re also the one who fed off a flower child at Woodstock and spent the next six hours watching your hand move. Convinced?”

That caused Spike to start cackling. "Ta, luv. I'm convinced, but then I always was." He glanced at Giles who was staring at him in surprise. "How else did ya think I took over th' Hellmouth so fast? Dru took out the hulkin' ugly an' I tossed th' brat inta a cage. A few quick pulls an' he was dust in th' wind."

"All we are is dust in the wind," Xander sang only slightly off key causing Willow to elbow him in the ribs good-naturedly.

Jaden giggled and winked at Xander before turning back to Giles, “Yeah. Spike complained that the Annoying One didn’t know how to have fun, what with all the chanting and stuff.”

Giles took off his glases and started cleaning them again. "That had been a bit of concern since no one knew what happened to the Anointed One," he confessed, taking a quick glance at Spike's smug expression. "Um, thank you for that."

Willow glanced at Buffy. "Convinced yet?" she asked softly only to sigh at the stubborn look on the blonde's face.

Jaden sighed, “Hey Buffy. Has Angel remembered yet that he got his wish to see you in the sunlight during that last battle with Angelus?”

All color drained out of Buffy's face. "Wh... what do you mean?" she stuttered.

“Second year, on the way home from the zombie football player incident. You two were talking about the fact that Angel was jealous of Xander cause he got to do things with you that Angel couldn’t. One of those things was getting to see you in the sunlight. In that last battle with Angelus he backed you into a patch of sun against a wall. He was going on about how there wasn’t anyone left to save you and was about to kill you when you finally snapped out of it and stopped the sword.” Jaden rattled off with a shrug.

Buffy's knees gave out as she collapsed to the floor, tears running down her face and smearing her mascara. "He did get to see me in the sun," she whispered before turning her attention to Xander. "Why did you lie to me about the spell?" she demanded, climbing to her feet and advancing on Xander.

“Because the mind set you were in right then if you thought there was a chance in *HELL* Angel could be brought back you’d be dead and Earth wouldn’t exist,” Jaden defended as she got between them and nearly spat the words at Buffy.

Buffy reared back as if slapped and Xander nodded. "I could see it in your eyes, Buff," he explained. "There was hope there, hope that Angel was back or on his way, but that hope would have made you hesitate at the wrong time and we'd all be toasting in a lake of fire or something right now."

"He's right, Slyer," drawled Spike. "That was Angelus' one hold over you, the one thing that made him certain that you couldn't kill him no matter who he tortured or how many he killed."

“You have *got* to get over this Queen and Goddess of the Universe complex you’ve fallen into or you’re going to get everyone killed. You’re *A* Slayer now, not *the* Slayer your word isn’t law anymore and truthfully it never was.” Jaden pointed out. Then she turned to Xander, “Has O’Toole tried to con you into helping him and his buddies bake a cake yet? I tend to get specifics confused within the years themselves.”

Xander blinked and looked at her. "And if he did?"

“Do they know what happened? Everything that happened?” Jaden asked with a sly grin.

Xander snorted. "Why should they?" he remarked in a slightly bitter voice as he moved to lean against the wall next to Spike. "I didn't say anything about it."

Willow looked confused. "Say anything about what?" she asked. "And what does Jake O'Toole have to do with anything?"

Jaden danced in place a bit, “Can I tell them? Please? Please? Please? I want to see their faces when they find out what happened. Though Faith knows a bit of it.”

Xander just shrugged and glared at a wall, his arms crossed over his chest and his whole position screaming "Leave me alone".

Jaden sighed dejected and pouted, “Fine take my fun I won’t tell them how you saved their lives that night or anything.”

Xander snorted. "Like they'd believe you," he drawled. "After all, I'm just the Zeppo, the normal one without any powers or special abilities. Who would believe that I'd save the school from being blown up by a group of zombies?"

“Oh and I need to track down Oz and see if he ever figured out why he was so full after he spent that same night, all night, down in the boiler room,” Jaden continued with an evil grin as if she was speaking to herself.

Xander blinked at her before shuddering. "I don't know what would be worse, doggie breath or zombie breath," he snarked, grinning at her while the rest of the Scoobies were looking at them like they were crazy and Spike had an appreciative glint in his blue eyes.

“I take it you never wondered what happened to O’Toole after you got done staring him down over the bomb?” Jaden asked as she enjoyed the confusion.

Xander shook his head. "He didn't jump me to shove about six inches of steel in my ribs, so I really didn't care," he confessed, running a hand through his shaggy brown hair.

“Oh he was planning on it. Then he opened the wrong door and that’s all she wrote,” Jaden informed him with an airy wave of her hand.

"Xander, when...?" began Giles only to stop when Xander glared at him.

"When did this happen, G-man? Well I'd have to say that wonderful period in my life when you decided that I was too useless to help you and so you all did your best to shove me away,” he snarked, glaring at the older man again, causing him to flinch.

“More specifically the whole Sisters of Jhe thing. You guys were to occupied to notice the five zombies running around trying to blow up the school for shits and giggles. Faith knows Xander was out that night cause he hit a cultist with his car to save her and then helped her reset her shoulder. Willow also knows he was out and about cause she ran into him and feed him a bullshit line while the zombies were getting supplies.” Jaden expanded snidely.

"And I wasn't going to say anything about it because I thought you guys knew he was there," drawled Faith, moving to stand next to Spike in the doorway, a smirk on her lips. "I take it I was wrong?"

Xander snorted. "Yeah, they decided that Mr. Normal here shouldn't be involved in their party since I didn't have any Slayer powers or magic or even research ability. Hence me running around, trying not to get killed by some zombies while also trying to keep the school in one piece."

“Yep.” Jaden confirmed as she raised her voice mockingly, “Oh Xander you can’t help. You’re just a mundane. You don’t have any special powers or callings. Never mind that being normal and still fighting means you’re braver than everyone else. And you’d already proven yourself by saving Buffy after the Master drowned her since Angel was just going to sit in his apartment reading and let the prophecy ride. Besides Angel doesn’t have any breath.” She wound down as she glared at the jerks that had hurt her Xander.

Spike glanced at Xander. "Didn't hear 'bout that, pet," he stated in a soft voice. "Care ta repeat the experience for those who were elsewhere at the time?"

“Hum? Oh, Back when Buffy first got here there was a prophecy that said that the Master would raise and she would die. It was in the Codex. Anyway, she went down to face the Master like a good little sacrifice only to find out that if she hadn’t the Master never would have gotten free. It was the Slayer power in her blood that amped him up to where he could get loose. Anyway, Xander heard about this and went to track down Angel cause he knew Angel would be able to lead him to the Master’s lair. Angel was calmly reading in his apartment when Xander comes barging in with a cross and demanding to be led down. Angel tried to talk him out of it but Xander didn’t care. When they got there Buffy was face down in a pool of water not breathing. Xander performed CPR and revived her.” Jaden explained nonchalantly.

Faith shook her head. "Bad timing, B,” she drawled. "Hot Stuff there goes and does something like that for you and then you just toss him aside?"

“Oh she was still in her Angel is God phase. I’m not even sure it ever occurred to her that Angel wasn’t the one who saved her,” Jaden needled.

Just then, a slender figure tapped Faith and Spike on the shoulders with a polite "Excuse me," and they moved to let Alphonse into the kitchen. "Do you have any more ice?" he asked. "My brother twisted his knee some during our last assignment."

Joyce moved over to the freezer, grabbing a dishtowel and dropping about a dozen ice cubes in it before folding it up. "Here you go," she offered. "Do you need help with anything else?" Al shook his head and accepted it with a thankful smile before vanishing back into the living room.

"What kind of assignment would those cuties be on that would cause injuries?" wondered Faith, her eyes following Al back into the living room.

“Where they’re from they’re what’s known as State Alchemists. Basically Spec. Ops. with powers. They’ve been looking for a way to get Ed’s arm and leg back so had to enlist in their world’s Army.” Jaden explained with a sigh.

Joyce's hand flew to her mouth. "Those boys are military? But they're too young!"

"Yeah, but they're old," remarked Spike softly. "Seen the world, both the good and the ugly, even at that young age."

“And when you’re a prodigy that can clap your hands and make God tremble the Army doesn’t care. They don’t see a pair of scared teenagers they see a pair of tools to be used until they’re all used up then be tossed in the trash. Kinda like the Watcher’s Council in that respect. Speaking of, Giles you do that damn test on Buffy’s 18th and I’ll shove that focusing crystal so far up your ass you’ll never tighten back up. You got me?” Jaden threatened as she rounded on the Watcher.

Giles sighed. "I had hoped to avoid that if at all possible," he confessed. "I have always hated that test, even before I gained a Slayer of my own, but the Council is adding pressure." he hung his head. "I'm not sure what to do anymore."

"If I had a way of gettin' over there with some of my buddies, we'd clean house for ya," remarked Spike, causing Giles' head to fly up in surprise. "From one punk to another... Ripper."

Jaden perked up and bounced a little, “I know. We’ll sic Ethan and his blasted band candy on them. Can we? That’d be fun and if we got video we could blackmail I mean renegotiate the way Slayers are treated to our hearts content.”

At that, both Giles' and Joyce's faces went red with embarrassment and Joyce cleared her throat as she busied herself with refilling the empty ice cube trays while Giles looked around at nothing.

"What about us?" asked Alphonse behind Spike and everyone turned to look at the boy. He took a breath. "We chose to go to the military, to become State Alchemists, but there are times when we don't like it, like when we get bad intel. But I'm sure Brother and I could make more than one person regret treating these girls that they're suppose to train and lead, this way."

Jaden threaded her way over to him and gave him a hug, “Is the big bro stable enough for us to move this conversation back in there yet? That way we can get everybody in on this.”

Al nodded. "He's feeling better and those painkillers really helped," he announced before sighing and muttering to himself. "Why didn't he just mention that he was having brief memory sparks from his automail?"

“Eh? Who? What? Back that up and repeat it loud enough for me to hear please? I’m technically responsible for you guys while you’re traveling with me so I need to know things,” Jaden teased as she threw an arm over his shoulders and led everyone back to the living room.

Al look up at Jaden, a slightly embarrassed look on his face. "Sometimes, usually after he's been hurt, Ed has what he calls 'memory sparks'," explained the young teen, shrugging a shoulder. "He tries not to dwell on them but it's sort of a memory of what happened..." He trailed off, uncomfortably shifting under her gaze.

“Ah. Gotcha. If you two can deal with them it’s all good.” Jaden chirped as they all arranged themselves, with her sitting down beside Ed.

Ed opened his eyes and grinned, impishly at her, before focusing on the rest of the group. "What'd I miss?" he asked around a yawn, blinking the last of the sleep out of his eyes.

“Oh me ranting a little at various people. Umm, Xander ranting a bit, then we moved on to how we were going to teach the Watcher’s Council that teenage girls aren’t tools to be used and tossed away like they were trash after awhile. Wanna help?” She chirped with an impish grin of her own and resting her head on Ed’s shoulder.

Ed smirked. "Let me get dressed and I'll be more than ready to go," he purred, tossing the covers back to reveal he was wearing a pair of shorts that exposed his legs up to mid-thigh and dropped down beside the suitcase with his name on it. "Hey, Al, where's my watch?" he asked, digging out a pair of fresh leather pants, tank top and black tunic-shirt. He started pulling on the clothes, no longer modest about his automail now that he had a mission.

Al was digging in his own suitcase for some clothes when Xander answered Ed.

"Is this it?" he asked, picking up a silver pocket watch, carefully only to almost drop it. When he got a better grip on it, his thumb pressed on the button that opened the face, and he blinked at the message scratched into the lid. "Don't forget. 3 October 10th," he read out loud, causing both boys to freeze.

"Don't forget what?" asked Willow in a soft voice, aware of the tension that suddenly filled the room from the brothers as Ed continued getting dressed.

“Calmly boys. They don’t know. And humans are worse than cats about curiosity. Here Xan let me have it,” Jaden said gently as she held her hand out.

Xander gently closed it and handed it to Jaden, his eyes never leaving the brothers as Al pulled on a button down shirt of a cream color and Ed grabbed a hairbrush and tie, attacking his hair to get the few snarls out before braiding it back. The he grabbed another tie and moved to help his brother brush and braid his hair.

Jaden took the watch and quietly walked over and hooked it to Ed’s belt, tucking the watch itself into the pocket. “There ya go, cutie.” She chirped with a grin and a kiss on the forehead.

Ed rolled his eyes at her. "You're going to persist in that, aren't you?" he drawled, a small, fragile smile on his lips as he tied off the braid before moving back to slip his boots on.

“Well, you’re both just so cute and cuddly. If I didn’t have that blasted no jailbait rule hanging me up…….” Jaden sighed as she leaned over and kissed Al on the forehead too so that he would feel left out.

That got a confused look from Ed and a faint blush from Al.

Jaden caught the confused look and explained, “Jailbait means you’re legally to young for someone my age to have sex with. If a person is over the legal adult age and they have sex with someone under it it’s called child molestation and the older person gets arrested for it. Hence you two are jailbait.”

*Now* Ed's face flamed red before he managed to shove it down with a growl. "I'm not too young..." he softly growled before shaking his head and dismissing the argument.

“Sweetie don’t say that where horny people who think you’re cute can hear you. It causes more flirting and teasing. See?” Jaden leaned and whispered into his ear as gave it a kitten lick and kiss.

His blush burned a bright red, almost matching the coat he tugged on, and even Al was blushing brightly.

Jaden just started giggling, finally having to hold onto her sides as she bent over double. Every little while you could barely pick out a ‘so cute’ in amongst the laughter.

Ed glared at her before smirking and gently clapping his hands together. Reaching out, he touched her shirt, causing it to fall off in ribbons of fabric.

Jaden stood there for a second, gaping before she rounded on Ed and playfully growled, “You brat! Come here! I’m gonna tickle you so hard you won’t be able to see straight for a month.” She threatened as she reached for him.

Cackling, Ed danced out of the way. "Do that and you won't get your shirt back!" he called in a sing-song voice.

“Alllll!” Jaden whined as she turned to the nice brother. “Your borther’s picking on me.”

Al just giggled shaking his head, indicating that he wasn't going to get involved as Faith and Spike leaned against each other, laughing, and even Xander was snickering while Giles had a smile on his face, sharing in the amusement with Joyce. Only Buffy and Willow weren't really smiling.

"But what does it mean?" Willow asked again, her face wrinkled in confusion.

Her question stopped the laughter from the brothers as if a switch had been thrown and the rest of the humor in the room died rather quickly after that.

Jaden paused long enough in her teasing to give her a *look*, “Will don’t worry about it. It’s personal and if they want to tell you they will.” She turned back to Ed. “Now then, brat, come re-make my shirt or I won’t teach you how to flirt so you can make Roy’s UST worse when you finally go back.”

Spike smirked and sauntered over with an arm around Faith's shoulders. "I'm sure between th' three of us, luv, we can make a right proper tease outta him," he grinned, smirking at Ed whose eyes started sparkling a bit more.

“And we work on Al too. I’ve seen a few fics where the brothers decided that sharing was a good thing and Roy was more than happy to play filling in an Elric sandwich,” Jaden said as she smirked at Al.

Al squeaked and ducked his head, his face flaming as his hands came up to cover his face, yet he peered at them between his fingers.

Spike smirked at the boys. "Delightful an' easy on th' eyes too. That’ll be a major advantage."

“Plus they’ve got that natural haven’t a clue they’re flirting thing I used to have going for them. Hell, with Al you teach him and there won’t be a single person in their world that won’t go on their back for him.” Jaden added with as smirk and a blown kiss towards Al.

Faith smirked. "We'll teach you guys everything," she promised, raising her hands above her head and shaking her hips some before tossing a smoldering glance at Xander and Willow. "The lessons are free for everyone interested," she offered, causing Xander to blink like a deer caught in the headlights.

Willow blinked and looked a bit excited. "Wow, you could teach me how to act like you?" she asked before blinking and blushing slightly. "I mean all confident and sexy and not like a skanky ho and I'll shut up now."

Jaden giggled, “Sure then we’ll turn you loose on poor, unsuspecting Oz with the condition that we get a report on how it worked. Deal?”

Willow blushed and giggled before nodding, and Faith sauntered over to her, throwing an arm around both Xander and Willow. "Relax, between Fangs, Hot Stuff, and myself, you'll be a total tease in no time,” she promised, tossing a wink at Jaden who still hadn't recovered her shirt.

“Wow. Check me out. I have a Faith nickname. Cooool.” Jaden cackled as she turned back to Ed. “And don’t think I’ve forgotten about you, Cutie. Where’s my shirt?”

Rolling his eyes as if he was greatly imposed, Ed clapped his hands again and held up her shirt, smirking. "Be glad it was me and not Mustang," he retorted. "Mustang would probably take you up on your offers."

“I wouldn’t have made the offers to Mustang. I like my guys smartassy and with long hair. Thank you,” she chirped with a smirk and a quick dart in to kiss him on the lips. She then just calmly put her shirt back on.

Ed raised a hand to his lips, surprised before shaking himself out of his daze at Al's snicker. "So, where are these idiots that we get to annoy?" he drawled, smirking as he pulled his gloves on.

“Over in England. Land of Tea and Tweed.” Jaden rattled off as she finished straightening her shirt.

Ed was about to ask before shaking his head. "So how are we getting there?"

{LEAVE THAT TO US. EVERYONE GATHER AROUND THE BOYS THOSE THAT ARE GOING.}

Xander and Willow grinned and gathered close to the boys with Giles behind them. Buffy looked at them before shaking her head and stomping off to her room. Joyce gave an apologetic smile before going after her daughter to talk some sense into her while Spike and Faith crowded in close with Jaden. "We're ready!" Xander called, almost bouncing in delight. There was a bit of a flash and they found themselves standing outside an old building as fog trickled down the street.

“Oh evil little shitheads that don’t know sacred duty from their well fucked asses. Where are you?” Jaden called out in a sing-songy voice as she went up and pounded on the door.

A head was poked out of a window above the door. "Bugger off!" he shouted in an irritated voice before the window was slammed again.

Smirking, Ed strolled up to the door and gently knocked on it, getting an idea of the density of the wood.

He waved for Jaden to stand back before spinning and lashing out with his automail leg, sending the thick oak door crashing into the entry hall. "Looks like they're still open," he remarked with a smirk.

“That was very cool. I get first dibs teaching him how to kiss,” Jaden called over her shoulder as she sauntered and looked around.

All of them wandered in except for Spike, who yelped when the doorway glowed briefly. Stumbling back a step, Spike growled as he stared at the doorframe. "Bloody ward's built right in," he growled, pointing at the faint line of decorative carving. Scribbling a quick array, Al placed his hand over it and concentrated. There was a light and the doorframe warped and shifted until it was a smooth, plain iron doorframe in the shape of an arch. Spike sauntered in and nodded at the young boy with a smile. "Appreciate it, Li'l Bit.”

“Oh pathetic dog bastards. Here pathetic dog bastards. Where are you?” Jaden went back to sing-songing after seeing that Al had handled the door. “We’ve got a bone or 60 to pick with you.”

Xander glanced around with a smirk, his steps taking on a bit more of a predatory glide as a faint gleam of green entered his dark chocolate eyes. "So where's everyone?"

“Ooo, Hyena Xander. Nifty. You’re fun to play with,” Jaden smirked as she turned around to walk backwards and keep an eye on him.

Giles pulled his tie off and dropped it on the floor next to his jacket and tucked his glasses in his shirt pocket before rolling up his sleeves. "I'm sure they're around here somewhere," he remarked with a smirk as he started forward. "Trevor's office is this way."

Jaden just cackled and quickly bounced over to Giles to give him a hug, “And you let Ripper out. This is going to be sooo much fun.”

Faith watched Xander stalk through the hallways and licked her lips. "Hey Xander, I'm gonna have to take you out shopping 'cause those pants are just *way* to baggy on you and it keeps me from appreciating you properly," she purred before tossing a smirk at Spike. "Fangs should know of a descent place to shop."

Jaden turned as grinned evilly at Faith, “Oh, maan. You should have seen him in full Hyena Mode.” She makes a point of shuddering gleefully. “Leather jacket, with tight jeans and shirts that not only fit but looked good on him.” She trailed off to a purr.

Sauntering up to Xander, Faith threw an arm around his shoulders. "You and me are going to have some fun, Hyena," she purred, nipping at his ear before almost skipping down the hallway.

Willow was walking with them, looking everywhere at once while Ed and Al seemed to be talking in their own language, half sentences and gestures as they talked about some alchemic theory or another.

The finally reached an office door that had light spilling out from underneath it and Ed smirked as he knocked on this door, the force of his punch sending the door flying through the air to bounce off the opposite wall. "Knock, Knock," called Giles as he entered the room.

The man behind the desk, Quentin Trevors, held a crossbow pointed at them and pulled the trigger. Before anyone could move, Ed's right arm lashed out and knocked it out of the air, tearing his glove with a metallic clang.

Jaden snorted and glared at the fat little bastard, “That was stupid. Very, very stupid.” She informed him calmly.

"What do you want here?" the man demanded, shaking as Spike sauntered over to the desk and plucked the little man out from behind it with a smirk. Beady eyes flickered over the group. "Rupert! What are you doing here? You're suppose to be in Sunnydale preparing your Slayer for her trial."

Giles leaned over the man and glared at him. "If you're talking about the one that's scheduled for her 18th birthday, you can forget it."

“That practice will no longer be tolerated. In fact I think it’s time to go through and completely revamp the whole way the Council works. It was set up to *help* the Slayer not get her killed with in days of being called. You seem to have forgotten that in your power hungry little schemes.” Jaden ranted quietly, making a few of them shiver.

Ed and Al both looked at her, twin smirks on their faces. "What's the plan?" Ed asked, flexing his right hand with the quiet click of gears and metal that caused the man to shiver.

"There's a main council chamber a few doors down," remarked Giles. "I believe it is time to call a meeting."

“Hey, Tremor. Is there an intercom in this place?” Jaden asked as she started poking around his desk.

Trevors squawked as Giles shoved a bunch of paper unceremoniously to the floor and uncovered the intercom she was looking for. "I believe that is what you're after, Miss Jaden," he replied politely.

She leaned over and gave him a peck on the cheek. “Thank you. Okie-dokie. Let’s see how this thing works,” She mumbled as she fiddled with it until she heard it squeal on. “Bet that got everyone’s attention but just in case: Attention. Attention. There will be a meeting in the Main Council Chamber immediately. If you’re in the building your butt better be there. We will hunt down stragglers, shoot them in the butt and drag them there anyway. Thank you that is all.” She chirped pleasantly for a finish.

Spike snickered. "That will get there attention," he remarked as they all headed to the council chamber. It plainly consisted of a large square table that looked like it belonged in some boardroom somewhere and was made out of solid wood. Giles shoved Trevors into a chair next to the end and a quick array from Al had the chair hugging Trevors in an assurance that he wouldn't be escaping. Ed hopped up on the table as Spike sprawled in the head chair, putting his feet up on the table as the others gathered around him.

Jaden grabbed Spike by the ear and moved him. “My idea my spot.” She said simply.

Al hopped up on the table next to Ed and drew another array on the wood in front of him before getting comfortable. They were ready by the time the people staggered into the room, all armed and ready for an attack.

“Greetings and salutations. Once I’m sure everyone’s here we can get down to business.” Jaden said grandly as she waved everyone in.

Al grinned and leaned over to Ed. "I haven't seen anyone look that nervous since Hughes got his latest pictures developed,” he whispered, loud enough for the whole room to hear and the brothers shared a small laugh.

Finally, the room was crowded with about thirty people and it didn't look like anyone else was going to show up.

“This everyone? Good. The old Watcher’s Council is defunked as of now. No more testes designed to kill your best Slayers at 18. No more taking them from their families the second they’re found. None of that bullshit. This Council was built for one reason and one reason only: to *help* the Slayer in her duties. Not turn her into a killing machine. Do you idiots even remember that there are demons out there that are friendly and harmless. Or do you just not care anymore. If Hilter couldn’t get that kind of policy to work what makes you think you will?” Jaden asked as she laid everything out.

A few fingers tightened on the crossbows but just as the bolts flew through the air, Al transfigured part of the table into a wall that everyone ducked behind, causing the arrows to embed themselves in the thick wood. "That wasn't very nice," he scolded.

“They’re old dried up sticks in the mud and despise change with a fiery purple passion. They’ll get over it or get fed to something,” Jaden said off-handedly.

"Can I nibble some, luv?” purred Spike as the wall was returned to the shape of a table and Faith smirked as she cracked her knuckles. Xander let out a high pitched giggle that raised the hairs on almost everyone's neck and Willow whispered a chant under her breath, causing the door to slam behind the men.

“That depends on whether they continue to be dumbasses or not. Don’t see why they thought the had to attack us. We weren't waving around any weapons or anything,” Jaden sniffed with a bit of a pout.

"They always have been more of the shoot first and ask questions later sort," drawled Giles with a disapproving frown. "Any common sense is trained out of those that get to stay here in England. Any resistance and you're shoved out into the field where you will hopefully be eaten."

“So why did they shove Wesley out? He was a good little get my Slayer killed quickly Watcher,” Jaden asked with a tilt of her head and a glance around the room, trying to find said person.

"Well, Wyndham-Price?" Giles called, his eyes fixed on an older gentleman holding a sword. "Care to explain why you wanted your son killed?"

“Yeah Mister Evil-To-A-Sweet-Kid-To-Make-Him-A-Pansy. Care to explain?” Jaden chirped cheerfully with an mean grin.

Wyndham-Price glared at them. "I owe you no explanation," he retorted.

“Translation: Wesley probably got sick of being raped and passed around as Daddy’s toy to daddy’s friends and put up a fight,” Jaden snarked loud enough for everyone to hear.

A red flush of anger passed over the old man's face. "As if anyone would have him,” he sneered. "He's weak."

“Actually, once he gets away from here and starts working on his own he turns out fairly decent. Granted he still has his spaz moments but anyone who can stand up to Cordy isn’t weak by any stretch of the imagination,” Jaden reported causally.

Xander stalked over to the man, culling him from the herd like the predator that had possessed him and forcing the older man back towards their group. Before he had realized what had happened, Spike had taken the sword and Faith pushed him into another chair that quickly became another binding chair under Al's hands. Ed grinned at his brother. "You're getting good at that, Alphonse," he praised and Al blushed faintly.

Faith leaned forward and placed a kiss on one pink cheek. "Yeah, you're getting real good at that," she purred in his ear, causing Al's blush to deepen as he ducked his head.

Jaden leaned in and kissed the other cheek, “That way it doesn’t get jealous.” She explained with a giggle.

"Should I be jealous that my brother's getting all the attention?" teased Ed, reaching over to lightly shove Al only hard enough to rock him slightly before Al shoved him back.

“Well, you get all growly when we kiss on you,” Jaden teased with a smirk. “You act like you don’t want to play.”

Ed smirked and propped his chin up on a fist. "But you already said that I'm too young to play with," he pouted.

“No I said the *law* said you were to young to play with. I know you’re an adult mind in a to young for it body. As long as the law doesn’t find out I don’t really care at this point,” Jaden corrected with a kiss on Ed’s nose.

Ed smirked. "Not like I'm gonna tell anyone," he purred, flirting with what little knowledge he had from observing everyone else in this group.

Spike smirked. "That it, I'm taking you lot to SoHo after this," he declared.

Faith smirked and bumped her hips into Spike and then into Xander. "So what do we do with this group of mummies?" she asked, bored already.

“Haven’t the foggiest besides setting up a new Council and retraining the trainable ones. Hey PTBs can we like speed that up? I wanna see what SoHo’s like,” Jaden asked as she glanced up at the ceiling.

Suddenly, all of the men save for Trevors and Wyndham-Price were talking about the *new* ways to train the Slayers, including allowing them a social life to gain friends and the like. {THAT BETTER?}

Jaden squealed and clapped. “Much. Thank you. Now what to do about dickless 1 and dickless 2?”

{GIVE 'EM TO SPIKE. HE'S LOOKING A BIT PEAKED.}

“But he said he was taking us to SoHo. He can’t do that if he thinks he’s dying, again, from indigestion,” Jaden pouted with an evil twinkle in her eye.

There was a flash and the two men were dressed in little Japanese school girl outfits, complete with bows in their hair, and signs around their necks that read "Cheap fucks".

{THERE NOW LEAVE 'EM ON A STREET CORNER NEAR SOHO AND YOU WON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THEM AGAIN.}

Jaden nearly gave herself a concussion as she fell to the floor cracking up. “Dropping them in Hong Kong would be better. They’ll screw anything over there if they’re desperate enough.”

There was a flash and the two men vanished. {HONG KONG IT IS.}

“Kick ass. Okay are we done yet? Cause I gotta say bored now,” Jaden whined.

Spike smirked and grabbed Jaden, pulling her to her feet. "Looks like it's time to go shopping, luv," he grinned collecting the rest of the group with his eyes and Ed snorted.

"I don't need anymore clothes. The ones I have are just fine."

“I don’t think SoHo sells just clothes, Cutie.” Jaden said as she reached out and snagged him, wrapping him tight in her arms and nipping his ear.

Spike smirked. "There are some clothing shops there, but there are also a few shops that are distinctly adult in nature if ya get my meaning," he winked with a slight leer at Xander. "They also got some clubs there as well."

A small shimmer on the table and a pile of IDs and cash was left behind. {HAVE FUN ON US AND GET WILLOW AND XANDER OUT OF THOSE CLOTHES.}

“Do we have to put them back in clothes?” Jaden snarked evilly before adopting an innocent look. “Oh dear, did I say that out loud? Oops.”

Xander chuckled as Willow blushed, Giles smirked as he gathered everyone up and started them towards the door. "Let us explore the wonders of SoHo before it gets too late and everything closes on us when the sun rises," he stated, gathering up the IDs and money on the table before dividing everything up among them.

The group walked out into the very foggy street as gray misty tendrils curled around everyone, causing Xander and Willow to shiver. Spike was at the head of the group, pointing out facts and trivia information as they walked down the street, and they stopped near a corner that didn't have traffic cruising up and down the cobblestone street. "Welcome to SoHo, pets," he announced before steering everyone into a small shop that had a brightly lit up window.

Inside, there was an impressive amount of clothing and a slender woman in a short skirt and a cropped top approached them. "Hello, Desale,” greeted Spike. "We've got a few people here who could use a bit of a make over." He gestured to Willow, Xander, and the Elrics.

She grinned and motioned for them to follow her. "We'll have you dressed in no time," she announced, pulling seemingly random clothes off of the racks as she lead them back to a curtained off changing room. In a few seconds, she had each person in their own cubicle and with their own pile of clothes.

“And remember you have to come out and model for us after each change,” Jaden chirped over her shoulder as she browsed through the clothes also.

That got an embarrassed "eep" from Willow before Faith frowned. "Y'know, I don't think they have the right underclothes for this," she drawled rather loudly which sent Desale bustling around again, this time tossing undergarments over the curtains for each person.

Jaden just leaned against the rack she was looking through giggling.

The first one to venture out was Xander, the green light gone form his eyes. Painted on black leather encased his legs as a black silk shirt billowed open over the white tank top while chunky boots completed the look.

“Ooooo. Wishverse Xander. Very nice,” Jaden purred as she walked around him.

The next out was Ed. He still wore his own leather pants and boots, but had reluctantly exchanged his tunic/jacket and black shirt for a set similar to Xander's but in a blood red color instead. He still wore the white gloves, slightly marring the finished product.

Jaden coughed once and then muttered loud enough for everyone to hear, “No Jaden. You can’t ravish him yet. Gently first then play with him till he screams.”

Al shyly emerged, wearing tight blue jeans that had a worn and soft look to them with a pale blue sleeveless shirt and a darker blue silk shirt with the sleeves rolled up and chunky boots as well as a faint blush on his cheeks.

Jaden glared at Spike and Giles. “This is to get even with me cause I know so many evil, embarrassing things about you two, isn’t it?” She pouted as she very obviously shoved her hands in her pockets.

Spike blinked innocently. "I have no idea what you mean, luv," he protested.

"I'm not coming out." Willow's adamant protest caused Spike to snicker.

“Willowwhisp. Come out. You have *got* to see what Xander would look like as a vampire,” Jaden called out as she started stalking over to drag her out.

"Nonono!! I know what I look as a vampire and he's probably all leather and slinky and delicious and drooly and shutting up now!"

“Willow I’ve got four words for you: Xander in leather pants,” Jaden teased after she quit cackling.

Rolling her eyes, Faith stalked over to the changing room, ripped the curtain aside and dragged the protesting redhead out to stand before all of them. A long crushed velvet skirt that was slit up both sides to reveal long pale legs that ended in matching emerald green heeled strappy sandals and a green silk haltertop fell in loose ripples to her waist where a gold chain belt was draped around her hips.

She ducked her head, hiding behind her long red hair that still fell loosely around her shoulders.

Jaden let out a long whistle, “Damn girl. I’m so straight you could use me as a ruler and even I’d try to chat you up in that.”

Faith leaned over and whispered in Willow's ear, causing Willow to turn almost as red as her hair. "Trust me, Red, you'll have men panting after you within an hour."

“Don’t you think she looks pretty and edible boys,” Jaden encouraged as she turned to everyone else.

Spike smirked. "Now that is how you should be dressed, Red," he agreed. "Ready to make any man your slave.”

"I agree, Willow, you look quite lovely and grown up in that," added Giles.

Jaden giggled, “Willow with Spike and Giles toys. That’s an interesting picture.”

Spike dropped enough money on the counter to cover the outfits and accepted the sacks that held their old clothes in them before grinning at Desale. "Thank you, lovely. Tell yer sire we're only here to play for a while." With that, Spike escorted them out to a nearby club that pulsed and pounded with the sounds of techno and dark goth music.

Spike smirked at the bouncer. "We're just here for some fun. We swear to obey the Peace Rule an' th' only thing th' Slayer there will stake will probably be some lucky vamp in a dark corner." The bouncer glanced over all of them before nodding and letting them in.

Jaden made a beeline for the bar and ordered a drink. After that she caught Faith’s eye and motioned to a table that looked like it could hold all of them and went to claim it.

Faith nodded and managed to get everyone herded in that direction, Al and Ed looking around with wide eyes as they tried to take in everything at once.

“I’m going to sit here and play spotter for any dancers. Used to do it all the time for my sister when we went out. I figure we can take turns making sure the table doesn’t walk off,” Jaden announced as she settled in and took a sip if her drink once the others arrived.

Ed and Al glanced around nervous as Spike dragged Willow out onto the dance floor while Faith proceeded to do the same for Xander.

"I've never heard of one of these places back home,” confessed Ed.

Jaden patted the seats on either side of her. “Come here and sit then. You can watch for awhile and see if you want to try it. Your world is set at about turn of the twentieth century our time so I don’t think you guys have dance club. Private galas and such yeah but not really clubs.” She explained as she started slipping into bodyguard mode, her eyes constantly scanning.

Al and Ed sat beside her with Al next to her and Ed on the other side of his brother, slipping into protection mode automatically. "Are all these places this loud?" asked Al, his eyes wide as they darted around.

Giles sat down with three drinks, passing the waters to the two boys as he snagged an ashtray from a nearby table and held up his packet of cigarettes, freshly bought from somewhere. "Do you mind?" he asked, and the boys shook their heads.

Giles lit up a cigarette, making sure that the smoke drifted away from their table. "From my experience, all clubs are either loud or smoke filled or both," he began with a smile. While they had been in the shop, he had traded his tweed for worn jeans, a white shirt with the sleeves rolled up and a gold hoop earring. "If it's a quiet club, then it's probably one that is a specialized club where only certain people can get in."

"Specialized how?" asked Al.

"Probably the same way that only State Alchemists can get into the First National Library while everyone else has to use the public branch," replied Ed before Giles could answer.

Jaden nodded, “Pretty much. Boring places if you ask me. So what do we want to do after the club? Besides find a soft, horizontal surface to fall face first onto.”

Ed yawned slightly. "The idea of a bed sounds like a good idea to me," he muttered, scrubbing at his eyes with a gloved fist.

Jaden smiled and looked at Giles, “Alright what’s the closest good hotel to here? Cause truthfully I’m a little tired too. Everyone else can stay and you can drag them over after their done. I’ll leave a note at the front desk and try to get the rooms within yelling down the hall distance of each other.”

Giles grinned. "There's a Hilton only two blocks that way,” remarked Giles, pointing in the general way they came from.

“Kick ass. And with them if you wave enough money they don’t ask questions. Okay, you two ready to find a bed?” Jaden asked as she finished her drink and stood up, looking at the boys.

Al and Ed both nodded and followed her out the door, letting out sighs of relief when the door shut behind them sealing the loud music in the building.

“I know. The music in those places takes a bit of getting used to. One of the reasons I don’t go that often.” Jaden agreed as she wiggled a finger in her ear. “So before we get there and I earn strange looks for asking in front of management, are we getting a room together or separate? I promise to do my level beside to keep my hands to myself but I do snore, I’m told, and tend to kick.”

Ed grinned. "Might as well get a room together," he said. "We can always be brothers and sister."

“Ewwww. Wire scrub brush to the brain. Don’t do that to me when I’m plotting man, that’s evil,” Jaden squealed as she shook her head and glared at Ed.

Al giggled even as Ed smirked. "You should have seen the looks Al and I use to get when we'd get a room together," he commented, starting down the street with his left arm tossed carelessly over Al's shoulders.

“I bet.” Jaden snorted to herself as she trotted to catch up to them, tossing her left arm over Ed’s shoulders.

Ed's right arm carefully encircles her waist, his metal hand fisted to keep from grabbing too tightly, as they casually make their way down to the Hilton Hotel, the glass doors spilling warm light into the foggy night.

“Hi. We have rooms. They should be listed under Jaden and party,” Jaden chirped when they reached the front desk.

The desk clerk typed away at the computer before smiling. "Of course. The Royal Suite," she announced, digging out three pass cards and handing them over. "Will the rest of your party be joining you soon?"

“Haven’t a clue. Their all down at that club down the street with the techno/goth music. They’ll probably come staggering when they close the place down for the night,” Jaden replied with a grin and an eye roll.

That got a smile from the desk clerk. "That elevator over there is connected directly with the Royal Suite,” she stated, pointing to an elevator that was a bit separate from the others. "If you want room service, it is *69 on the phone."

“Rock on. Thanks. Come on guys, lets go fall face first into something soft and nonmoving,” Jaden said as she tossed her arm over Ed’s shoulder again and steered them towards the elevator.

Ed grimaced as he caught a sniff of himself. "That will happen right after I get a shower," he stated with a reluctant sigh.

Al sniffed at his clothes and shuddered as well. "I'll get one after you, brother," he stated. "Maybe if we scrub these clothes with some soap, they won't smell so bad in the morning."

“That’s the reason the Gods invented laundry service.” Jaden informed them. “I suppose I should be nice and take one too since I can’t actually remember the last time I had one.”

When they reached the suite, they found out that it was a living room/dining room like area with five bedrooms with double beds in each one and three bathrooms off of the sitting room. Also sitting there was a small overnight bag with each of their names on it and the bag of clothes that had been taken to the club after their impromptu shopping trip.

“Cool. Clean things to change into and three baths so we each get a shower and the other can fight later,” Jaden chirped a little more awake.

Ed was already moving towards one of the bathrooms, stripping as he went, too tired to be concerned with modesty, but Al smiled at Jaden and slipped into the bedroom. Ed shimmied out of the last of his clothes, tossing the boxers over his shoulder before kicking the door shut with an almost negligent kick of his real foot.

Jaden shook her head at Ed and followed Al into the bedroom to put her stuff down and find something to sleep in, studiously ignoring Al.

"Don't you want to claim one of the other rooms for yourself?" asked Al, tugging at his bootlaces, trying to get them undone. His shirts lay in a crumpled heap in one corner.

“Why? I like you guys and if you’re truly worried about your virtue I’ll take one bed and you two can have the other,” Jaden offered matter of factually as she riffled through her bags still looking for a sleep set.

Al giggled as he finally got his boots off. "No, I just thought you'd like to have a room to yourself," he answered with a shrug before standing up and grabbing a robe. He stopped to look at the beds before grinning. "Want a bigger bed so Edward can't complain?"

“I keep forgetting you’re an alchemist,” Jaden bemoaned as she slapped her forehead. “Maybe a bed that sleeps three with wiggle room?”

Grinning, Al pulled out the chalk from his pocket and drew an array on the carpet that was big enough to encircle at least the foot of each bed. He closed his eyes and concentrated. In a few seconds, an exxtra-large king sized bed stood in the middle and Al nodded. "Brother's a bit nervous about sleeping with anyone since his automail's so heavy."

“Makes sense. Especially if he’s like me and tosses at night. Course if it works out right I can just cuddle up to him on that side and sleep on him. I’m a bit of a cuddler anyway,” Jaden said as she nodded and grabbed her stuff to go take a shower.

Giggles followed her out as Al slipped into the third bathroom with a robe.

When Jaden emerged from the shower, she found a concerned Al knocking on the bathroom that Ed had vanished inside. Frowning finally, he grabbed a pen off of the nearby table and scribbled a quick array on the door. In a few seconds, the door was open and Al was inside with the sound of a shower clearly running.

“What’s wrong?” She asked concerned as she came to the door.

"Looks like he fell asleep," replied Al with a sigh of relief as he turned off the water. "Um, I'm going to need your help moving him."

“Sure. Just tell me how,” Jaden said as she slid into just inside the bathroom and waited.

Al quickly spread a large towel on the ground. "If you could get his legs, we'll lift him onto the towel and dry him off," Al stated, slipping his hands under his brother's shoulders. "Hopefully, he'll wake up enough that we can get him to walk to bed."

“Gotcha.” She chirped as she walked over and reached in to carefully grab Ed’s legs. Al grabbing him was one thing someone else also doing it might cause him to kick in reflex.

"Ready, one two three Lift!"

“Heave ho and away we go,” Jaden rhymingly snarked as she lifted.

They managed to get Ed out of the shower/tub and onto the towel without dropping him and Al tossed Jaden a towel as he started drying his brother off. "The automail's waterproof for the most part but definitely try to get as much water out of the joints as possible," he instructed, wrapping his towel around Ed's hair before grabbing another towel and attacking the water lingering on the automail arm.

Jaden attacked the automail leg, buffing and rubbing trying to get as much water as possible out of it then she attacked the other leg.

The entire time they were drying him, Ed lay there, asleep, and Al shook his head as he traded his towel for a robe, easing it on his brother. "He must have been really pushing himself these past few days to be this exhausted," he remarked, squeezing the last of the water out of Ed's unbraided hair. "He'll probably have nightmares tonight. He usually does when he gets this exhausted.”

“Don’t worry I’m good at cuddling and kissing nightmares away. Unless I get caught up in one, I tend to send out calming vibes when I do my impression of a stone,” Jaden assured the poor kid as she helped stand Ed up and moved them towards their bedroom.

They managed to get Ed into the bed without so much as a twitch from the unconscious boy. AL found some sleeping pants and slipped them on before climbing into bed and dragging Ed into his arms as he waited for Jaden to join them.

Jaden pulled her hair back in a tail and climbed in on the other side of Ed so that he was sandwiched between them. Then she leaned over the comatose boy and pecked Al on the lips, “Night.”

"Good night," Al replied with a faint blush has he snuggled down against his brother.

It was probably a few hours later when the sounds of tired people entering the suite woke Jaden up, but it was the restless twitching of Ed that indicated the onset of a nightmare. The boy's face was twisted in agony as small whimpers escaped him. Sweat had plastered his hair to his skin and Al woke up by the movement, whispering soothing words into his brother's ears to no use.

Jaden added her own crooning and petting, “Easy sweetie. You’re here. You’re safe. Al’s here. Al’s safe.” Over and over she crooned that as she petted Ed’s hair with one hand and his chest with the other.

"No! Al!" screamed Ed, thrashing as if he was struggling to get something and the bedroom door crashed open to admit a vampire in game face and a Slayer ready to defend her new friends from the Legions of Hell.

Jaden instantly held up a hand to stop the other two, “Easy guys. Just a nightmare. We’re trying to fix it.”

Faith and Spike slumped as they realized that there was nothing they could do. Spike nodded his understanding and turned back to the main room, grabbing the bag with his name on it. "If anyone wants ta crash with me, I promise ta be a good little vamp and keep m'fangs and hands to myself," he said as Faith closed the door.

It took a few more minutes before the nightmare released Ed enough for him to slip back into a peaceful sleep.

Jaden just shook her head sadly and drifted back to sleep herself.

The next time anyone woke, it was the gradual waking where the body has decided that it's rested long enough and it's time to get up. Ed yawned and shifted around, snuggling farther under the covers with Al before drifting in that wonderful place that is between sleep and full wakefulness.

Jaden just snuggled harder into his back and sighed.

Soft talking intruded in the peace that filled the room as the tantalizing smells of breakfast drifted in to tease and tempt them to rejoin the waking world.

Jaden groaned, “I don’t wanna wake up. Mornings are evil.”

Al grumbled and sighed as Ed shifted and actually sat up, blinking at the room. "How'd I get in here?" he muttered before shaking his head and climbing out of the bed, tying the robe tighter around him before stumbling out into the center room where there was food.

Jaden giggled and shifted over to use Al as a body pillow, “We don’t have to wake up right now do we?” She whined as she cuddled in.

Just then, Al's stomach grumbled loudly.

Jaden poked it and ordered, “Shut up. I wasn’t talking to you.”

Al giggled and sighed. "I should eat. It's been too long..."

Jaden sighed heavily, “Alright. Come on let’s go feed that dragon you seemed to have hatched in your gut.” As she climbed out of the nice, warm bed and straightened her outfit.

Smiling, Al stumbled out to find that Ed had practically commandeered the coffee pot and a plate brimming with food.

Jaden pouted at Ed and whimpered pitifully, “Coffee?”

Blinking blearily, Ed shoved the pot towards her as he dug into his plate of food, wolfing it down as if afraid someone was going to take it away from him.

Xander blinked. "I haven't seen someone eat like that since the last time the football team hit an all you can eat buffet after a winning game.

Jaden inhaled some of her coffee before replying, “They’re from what we would consider turn of the century time wise. Plus as far as I know Ed’s always had an apatite like a starving man.”

Al dished up nearly as much food as Ed and started eating as well. "Plus, I think the last time we got something descent to eat and not just a bite where it could be had was before that mission blew up in our faces," he added, politely waiting until his mouth was empty before talking.

“There is that,” Jaden agreed as she picked up a banana and started nibbling on it.

Xander finished off his plate of food before grabbing another cup of coffee. "So what are the plans for today?" he asked.

“I vote for being lazy,” Jaden piped up with a grin.

Willow nodded, grinning. "Sorta like a get to know you day," she agreed, digging in one pocket. "I found a deck of cards in my bag,' she offered.

“Naked girls or naked guys?” Jaden quipped as she reached for the coffee pot again. Her brain didn’t engage usually until about the second cup.

Willow giggled and blushed. "Actually a bit of both," she confessed. "We just gotta get a big bag or three of M&Ms and we'll be ready to go."

“Call down to room service. We’re in the high-roller suite so they’ll expect us to be odd,” Jaden suggested as she settled down on one of the couches.

Xander reached over and snagged the phone, dialing room service and requesting three big bags of M&Ms before hanging up. "It'll take 'em a bit but they said we'd have 'em in less than an hour."

Ed finished his food and stumbled over to where he'd dropped his pants the night before. Somehow he managed to keep his balance as he grabbed the silver watch and stumbled back to Jaden’s couch, curling up on it with his head in her lap and his real hand clenched around the watch.

Jaden just smiled and started combing her fingers through his bangs gently, “You don’t do mornings any better than I do and I know you got more sleep last night cause we had to drag you out of the shower before you drowned.”

Ed snuggled down a bit farther as Al joined them on the couch, curled up at Ed's feet. "Haven't been sleeping too good,'" confessed Ed in a soft voice around a yawn. "Nightmares."

Jaden snorted and leaned in to kiss him gently on the lips, “Yeah we know. Faith and Spike broke down the door last night when one got out of hand. I told them we had it handled so it’s all good.”

"Between idiots in a town that hate alchemists and the Anniversary approaching, it's a wonder I get *any* sleep these days," sighed Ed, relaxing under her petting. Al reached out and stroked Ed's legs, slowly convincing Ed to uncurl some and pulled his brother's bare feet into his own lap.

"Anniversary? What anniversary?" asked Willow, her eyes wide with curiosity.

“Private. But speaking of is there anything you want to do for it? I think we can go back long enough for that if you want,” Jaden said as she half glared at Willow and then softened her eyes for the boys.

Ed shook his head. "Can I just forget it for once?" he whispered, closing his eyes. "I don't wanna go back to visit her grave or the ruins."

“Sure if that’s what you want. What about you Al?” Jaden said with a shrug and a glance at the younger brother.

Al thought for a few minutes before nodding. "Let's forget about it this year," he agreed. "We should learn to live again and move forward instead of being pulled down by a past we can't change."

“Okay. So. Now that the doom and gloom has been discussed for the day, I thought we were going to play cards?” Jaden asked with a decisive nod and a grin.

Just then there was a knock on the door and Xander jumped up to answer it, coming back with three large bags of M&M's. "The poker chips have arrived," he announced with a grin as Willow and Giles cleaned off the dinning table, stacking the dishes back on the cart before shoving the whole thing in the hall, keeping only the coffee pot and mugs with them.

"Poker?" asked Al, watching them curiously.

“It’s a card game. Very fun, as long as you aren’t playing with money, and there are dozens of different ways to play. Including strip poker,” Jaden chirped with an evil grin.

Ed smirked. "It's what Havoc's always playing and griping about loosing money to Hawkeye, Al," yawned Ed, sitting up to watch.

“Hey. Come back here. I wasn’t done petting,” Jaden grouched with a grin and a tug.

Grinning, Ed allowed her to pull him back down and practically purred when her fingers slipped through his unbraided hair.

Spike held his hands out for the cards and Willow dropped them in as Xander found a large bowl and poured all three bags of candy in it. "Okay, everyone gather around who's playing," he called, glancing at the table before frowning. "Faith, help me move the coffee table." Together, they moved the table closer to the couch that held Jaden and the brothers before moving chairs and cushions around it.

“I’m just going to sit and watch. I have very weird luck with cards, it tends to annoy people,” Jaden said as she settled back and started twisting and untwisting Ed’s hair.

Al grinned and passed on playing as well so the Scoobies sat down, each with a hand full of candy as Spike shuffled the cards and dealt them. "Just to make this a bit more fun and interesting, the winner of the hand gets to ask a question of the losers," announced Spike. "If you fold, you don't get asked. If you don't want to answer the question, you can take a dare."

Jaden snorted and muttered, “This ought to be enlightening.”

Giles smirked and quickly folded, but Willow, Xander and Faith stuck it out against Spike only to fall before his full house. Smirking, Spike gathered the candy from the center of the table as he regarded his prey. "Slayer, What exactly do you wear under that leather outfit of yours?"

Faith smirked and leaned on the table. "Skin," she purred, causing more than one embarrassed blush but Spike only chuckled.

Spike turned his attention to Xander. "So, how much of the hyena an' soldier are left in yer head?"

Xander smirked. "Enough that I can hold my own in a fight against a person, track, and create bombs."

Nodding, Spike turned his attention to Willow who was fidgeting. "Why do you wear such unflattering clothes, Red?"

She blinked and looked confused. "They're comfortable and cheap and I can spend the money I save on clothes elsewhere like groceries, or spell components, or something like that."

Spike smirked at the answers and shuffled the cards again, dealing out another hand, this time the betting was fast and furious and there was quite a pile of candy in the middle of the table before Xander cackled and placed a Royal Flush down, causing all the others to groan. "Okay G-Man, just how close were you and Rayne?"

Giles leaned back in his chair and smirked. "I can tell you that he has a tattoo on his arse in the shape of a crescent moon," he drawled, causing Xander to laugh before the brunette turned his attention towards Spike.

"So, Bleached Menace, are vampires particular about who they get groiny with?"

Spike shook his head and scooped up the cards to shuffle them when Faith grabbed them, staring to shuffle the cards herself. "Nah, vampires don't care if it's a willing body and few don't care if the body's willing." He smirked. "Personally, I prefer willing."

Xander nodded and grinned at Faith. "Faith of the Slayage," he began getting her to look at him. "Think anything could work out between us? Either friends or even more than friends?"

Faith looked at him, seriously. "Friends we can work at but the more than friends part, I dunno," she confessed and Xander nodded. "All I ask," he replied before smirking at Willow who squeaked. "Wills, you have any satin and lace in your drawers that you didn't get last night?"

An innocent look appeared on her face as she blushed slightly. "Something nice for Oz," she confessed in a small whisper.

"Go Red!" chortled Faith before she stared dealing cards again.

That was how it went for the day. They kept the cards away from Spike, who pouted until they confronted him with stacking the deck and then he only smirked, and they learned more about each other and formed a tighter group bond then what was there with Buffy.

"You people are strange," Ed remarked from where he was still curled up on the couch, his head in Jaden's lap, but sometime during the day he had wandered off and put pants on, foregoing the shirt for now.

"Nah, this is us on a normal day," drawled Xander, tossing a few M&Ms in his mouth from the bowl of extras.

“Except for the library setting and the mile high piles of old books that look like they could topple at a moment’s notice,” Jaden chimed in.

Xander and Willow nodded. "And we don't have junk food lying everywhere with Giles sighing and warning us not to get his books dirty," added Willow with a smile.

“Or him cleaning his glasses every little whipstitch muttering ‘Oh dear’ for whatever reason,” Jaden snarked with a fond smirk.

Xander glanced at Giles, a smirk on his face. "You do clean those glasses a lot, G-man," he teased. "Trying to change your prescription?" Giles just shook his head.

Just then, the boys' suitcases appeared next to the couch and a note appeared on Jaden's lap, next to Ed's head. Al reached over and picked it up. "Scoobies, you'll be sent back tonight when it's safe. Elrics and Jaden, get ready to leave in a few minutes. A fox wants to talk to you."

Ed blinked and pulled out his shirts, slipping them on before grabbing his boots. "Fox? What fox?"

Jaden paled and gulped, “Ummm. Not my fault. I didn’t do it. I wasn’t there. You can’t prove it. The sheep are lying.” She babbled as she started frantically looking for a way out.

Ed and Al looked at each other in confusion, both dressed. "Sheep?" they asked in one voice as the world started shimmering around them.

“Old bit I picked up in a reenactment group I used to run with. I’ll explain later if you want and I’m still in one piece,” Jaden said as soon as the world settled. She instantly started looking around trying to see where they had been dropped and how much of a head start she could have.

They were standing in the open courtyard of a temple and a girl in an aqua kimono with matching hair and red eyes stood on the porch, staring at them in surprise. "Hello," she greeted with a smile. "Are you here to see Genkai?"

“Oh thank you Goddess. They didn’t drop on right on his head and I’ve got woods I can get lost in……. until he links into the whole forest and catches me that way. Merde!!” Jaden grouched as she sagged in relief. “Um, if you think she’d be willing to talk to us? I think I’ll need some kitsune repellent if such a thing exists.” She babbled a bit louder.

"Are you going to try and escape from me again, pretty?" purred a voice behind them as Kurama stalked around the trio, his red hair shining in the sun as he smiled at Jaden.

Jaden eeped loudly as she jumped and spun so that she could keep an eye on Kurama as she walked backwards. “Kurama! Hi. How ya been? You know, disappearing like I did wasn’t actually my fault. See I ran by this alley and this arm reached out and grabbed me. Turns out it was Sage from Ronin and then things just kinda went from there. But look, I’ve found cuties to play with that need to be taught how to flirt and stuff and just handle normal human contact,” she babbled faster than a brook as she kept backing up.

Kurama smirked as he backed her into a tree before darting forward and stealing a quick kiss. "I'm not that much of a tyrant," he purred before turning to gaze at the boys who were only a bit younger than his human form. "Very nice. Very nice indeed."

“Aren’t they though? Oh and you’ll be happy to know, she says digging her own grave, that the rating on the fic went up to adult. Anyway, guys this is Kurama. Kurama this is Ed and Al Elric.” Jaden introduced as she calmed down and started breathing again.

Kurama smirked at her. "We may have to investigate that later,” he remarked before smiling at the boys. "A pleasure to meet you both."

Ed stared at Kurama as if he wasn't sure about the guy first and kept between him and Al.

Jaden just smirked, “You’ll have to forgive Ed. He’s the big brother and has been taking care of both of them for years now. Ed I swear, Kurama’s about as harmless as you or Al,” she assured the blonde as she backed away just in case he didn’t believe her.

"That's not really reassuring,” remarked Al, smiling at Jaden over his brother's shoulder. "Brother is hardly harmless."

“True but that’s only if you piss him off or attack you. Kurama’s more don’t attack his friends and for the love of all that’s ever been considered holy *don’t* insult his mother and you’re fine,” Jaden explained with a grin and a wink.

Ed nodded. "I think we can handle that," he stated, before grabbing his suitcase and his brother's hand and dragging them both over to Jaden.

“So. We got dropped on Genkai’s head. Who all’s here?” Jaden chirped as things calmed down and she started running a hand through Ed’s hair again.

Kurama shrugged in that gracefully elegant way he had. "Genkai dragged Yusuke towards the swamp for some training. Shizuru has Kuwabara running some errands for her before he comes over to visit," he explained with a slight jerk of his head towards the delicate woman who was still watching them. "And Hiei is around somewhere."

“And Heaven help us when he and Ed meet,” Jaden muttered under her breath.

Ed turned to glare at her. "What do you mean by that?" he demanded.

Jaden dropped a quick kiss on his lips and replied, “Simple you two would get into the mother of all snark wars and I don’t have any popcorn yet.”

Al giggled quietly and a soft chuckle slipped out of Kurama. "Come, we can wait on the porch with Yukina," he invited, holding his arm out in invitation.

“Why thank you kind sir,” Jaden snarked mildly with a southern accent as she took his arm. She then giggled and teased, “Maaan. You would not believe the fandoms I have screwed up so far. It’s been fun.”

Kurama smiled and escorted her and the boys to the porch where Ed flopped down, his suitcase remaining on the ground as he looked around. Yukina hurried inside before reemerging a few minutes later with tea.

"So what fandoms have you screwed up?" inquired Kurama, pouring a cup of tea for each of them.

“Well, let’s see, I stole Ranma out of his fandom and gave him to Inuyasha as a prezzie. I freed Inuyasha from Kagome’s influence so he doesn’t have to dance attendance on her anymore. And then I put a collar on Sessy so that Rin could teach him not to be a bully. Ummm, I stole these two from their fandom so that the fandom could straighten itself out,” Jaden rattled off as she thought.

Kurama smirked around his cup. "Just a normal few days for you then," he remarked.

Jaden nodded. “Pretty much. Oh, and I got draped in silks and jewels when I visited Cap’n Jack Sparrow and Will on the Pearl. And around here somewhere is an ancient Egyptian threesome porno from another fandom. Kenshin promised to bash your head in if you don’t behave.” She continued to report with an evil smirk for that last bit.

Kurama chuckled and glanced at the boys. "Are you having fun with Jaden?" he inquired politely as Yukina sat next to them with a tray of sandwiches.

Al nodded. "Yes sir," he replied. "We met some interesting people just a bit ago."

“And I’ve already gotten Ed to the point of letting me cuddle him to my heart’s content,” Jaden quipped as she reached over and ruffled his hair.

Yukina glanced over at the trees and smiled. "Hiei has arrived," she replied in a soft voice.

Ed glanced around but didn't see anyone. "How do you know?" he asked, curious.

Yukina shrugged slightly. "He's not masking his energy right now,” she explained.

“Oh boy. This ought to be fun,” Jaden muttered quietly.

There was a slight hiss of air and a boy about as tall as Ed was standing there, dressed entirely in black with his black hair rising above his head in almost a flame-like style. Red eyes flickered over the brothers before dismissing them as unimportant.

"Good afternoon, Hiei," greeted Kurama with a small smile. "Care to join us for some tea?"

Hiei glanced at Kurama. "Is this the ningenken that gave you the slip?" he asked, sounding like he didn't care one way or another and smirked when Kurama nodded. "Stupid fox."

“Snark King 1 meet Snark King 2, play nice,” Jaden introduced as she glanced from Hiei to Ed and back again. Then what Hiei said actually registered, “Hey! It’s not like *you* could do any better. I’m a Mary-Sue. I have a bigger God complex than Koenma. Besides, I don’t say taboo words, like oh say *hot*, just because someone says I can’t. I have better sense.”

Ed blinked at Jaden. "What does that have to do with anything?" he asked, glancing at the other apparent boy who was busy looking anywhere other than at any one in the party.

“Hiei here has a real problem about doing what he’s told. They came up against someone a while back that had the power to steal your soul if you said the word they tabooed. Ditzy here didn’t believe the guy so he said the word and poof no more soul,” Jaden explained with an evil smirk.

Ed looked at Hiei and burst out laughing, his tea spilling on the porch as he dropped his cup.

Jaden smirked over Ed’s laughing body at Al and teased, “He who does not have same problem should be the first to laugh. Isn’t that right Al?”

Al giggled. "True. How many times have you tried to rattle the Colonel only for him to push our buttons, Brother?" he asked as Ed calmed down.

Ed snorted and waved it off. "If I didn't annoy Mustang, he'd think I stopped liking him or something."

“He has a point. Mustang relieves his UST by picking on Ed and Ed plays along,” Jaden agreed with a nod.

Kurama glanced at the young boy in question and could definitely see why someone would be attracted to him. "It must be hard dealing with someone who has such strong feelings for you all the time," he remarked only to blink in surprise at Ed's casual, "Whatever."

“Ed’s standard answer whenever he has to deal with those icky emotion thingies,” Jaden snarked as she leaned over and pecked Ed on the cheek. “And you need to clean up the tea you spilled so that Yukina doesn’t have to, Ed.”

Ed grabbed a napkin off the tray and sopped up the tea, refusing to meet Kurama's curious gaze.

"What can you tell us about your world?" Kurama asked once Ed had been given a fresh cup of tea.

Hiei snorted and grabbed one of the sandwiches. "Can't be any worse than this place," he grumbled.

Ed shrugged. "It's not been that bad since the war with Ishbal ended," he drawled. "I just get to go out and deal with rogue alchemists and their chimera zoos."

“Take this world and rewind it back to the turn of the twentieth century. Few cars, few anything that we’re really used to,” Jaden added for atmosphere.

"Better air, fewer cities, more wilderness," murmured Kurama, a thoughtful and almost wistful look on his face.

"You say that like it's a good thing," snorted Ed, glaring into his mug.

“He’s a forest baby. Give him lots of woods to run in and you won’t see him for days if he doesn’t have school,” Jaden explained to Ed, then she turned to Kurama. “They also have a military based government. If you ain’t military you’re screwed. Think Hilter without the genocide.”

"Not true," replied Ed with a slight glare. "I could do anything I wanted, but the only thing the military has to offer me is the funding for any research I might do in the future."

“True. Sorry. I’m running on later episodes where the Fuhrer went a little nuts and decided to start wars for fun,” Jaden explained as she gave the young alchemist a sideways hug.

Ed and Al both shivered at that and cuddled closer to Jaden. "If that happens, I don't wanna go back. No matter who is there," whispered Ed, burying his face in her shirt.

“Okay sweetie. Tell you what? If they can’t stop that from happening I’ll see if we can’t fetch the rest of your people and we’ll move all of you somewhere else, okay?” She asked gently as she petted both her boys and shot a pleading look at Kurama.

Kurama moved over to sit beside Al and gently gathered him in his arms, stroking the pale gold hair. "I'm sure we can figure something out," he soothed. "Koenma still owes us for the whole Sensui problem and I'm sure he wouldn't argue about some people arriving from another dimension to escape a madman."

“Oh God! Winry here. The place wouldn’t servive. Take Keiko and add another half probably. Hiei and Roy would get along though probably. They both do fire. Genkai and Hawkeye would get on like a house on fire…..” Jaden drifted off mumbling so low only Ed could hear and that was because he was still buried in her shirt.

"Aunt Pinako and Winry would be able to set up shop and could do wonders with automail if this place is anything like the last place," remarked Al.

"Automail? What's that?" inquired Yukina, her hands politely folded in her lap as she stared at them with curious red eyes.

"It's biomechanical replacement limbs," explained Al, sitting up slightly but not moving out of Kurama's arms. "Edward has an automail arm and leg to replace the ones he lost..." Trailing off, he buried his face in Kurama's shirt as he fought past the memories that threatened to swarm up.

“Man. They’d have amputees on there knees begging to have their babies even if it meant a sex change if those two could set up here.” Jaden chortled.

Ed snorted and sat up some. "Sure if you don't mind feeling live wires connected to nerves," he added, his golden eyes filled with pain. "It's painful to get automail."

“Yes and some people have had to watch their children grow up without any limbs for some reason or another. If the person’s old enough to understand what’s going to happen and can afford it they aren’t going to care about the pain.” Jaden explained as she smoothed his bangs out of his eyes.

Ed shrugged a shoulder. "I guess," he agreed, unfastening his tunic jacket but not taking it off.

"Oh!" exclaimed Yukina catching sight of his gloved hands. "You got tea on your gloves. I'll go soak them right now to get that stain out."

She reached for his gloves only to have Ed curl his hands protectively against his chest. "It's fine," he said, looking around at everyone else. "I've got a spare pair."

Jaden patted Yukina on the hand and gently informed the girl, “He’s still a little shy about new people seeing his automail. Let him get used to you and then we’ll see okay?”

Yukina nodded, but threw concerned glances at Ed. Before anyone could say anything, there was an explosion followed by a male scream as a body fell to the ground and a few seconds later, a short woman with light pink hair showed up to glare at the teen who was struggling to his feet. "Playtime's over, Idiot," she growled. "If that's all you're gonna give me, then you're gonna have a lousy month.”

"Oh shove it, Granma," shouted the teen, his black hair falling in his face. His clothes were slightly ripped and there were a few bruises on his skin but nothing that indicated that he was in serious danger. "All you ever do is nag me, and haven't even taken into consideration that I'm still getting these damn powers under control."

“Ladies and Gentlemen may I introduce you to Yusuke, otherwise known as the Flying Dimwit,” Jaden cracked as she waved a hand his direction.

Ed shook his head. "Dimwit indeed," he drawled as he watched Yusuke and the little old lady face off in a shouting match before she decked him, sending him flying across the yard. "Anybody with half a brain knows that if someone can boot you across the yard, you don't make 'em mad."

Al blinked innocently at Ed. "So what's your excuse, Brother?" he asked innocently only to shriek with laughter as Ed lunged at him, fingers finding ticklish ribs.

Jaden very carefully and quietly moved to where she was hiding behind Yukina. “Stay put. The last time something like this happened they decided to gang up on poor, little me. You’re protecting me.”

Yukina giggled and even Kurama chuckled as they watched the brothers rolling around in the grass like a pair of puppies.

"Hey, who are you guys?" asked Kuwabara as he walked through the temple gate and stared at the two boys.

Ed rolled off of Al and stood before his brother and the new arrival who towered over him at about six feet tall. "Who wants to know?"

“Friends of mine. Hi, I’m Jaden. Sorry but you can’t have Yukina yet. She’s protecting me from the evil tickle monsters over there. Last time it was a pillow fight that I was very innocently staying out of and the next thing I know they’re both coming at me with pillows.” Jaden chirped very quickly as she tried to lighten the mood.

Kuwabara snorted as he stared down at Ed, his hands in his pockets. "How come you're afraid of a pipsqueak like him anyway?" he demanded only to double over as Ed's fist drove all the air out of Kuwabara's lungs before he grabbed Kuwabara's blue jacket and pulled the taller teen to his face.

"I'm not a pipsqueak, you dumb baboon!" he snarled.

“Yukina perhaps you should go get the first aid kit ready and maybe the phone, if there’s one up here, so that you can speed dial the hospital,” Jaden suggested quietly as she tried to shooed the gentle girl into the temple.

Growling, Kuwabara grabbed at Ed's arm only to catch the open jacket that the blond teen slipped out of, and Kuwabara stopped, staring at Ed in surprise. "Hey, you've got a metal arm," he stated in surprise and Ed rolled his eyes as he swept Kuwabara's legs out from under him, sending the carrot-top teen to the ground with a yelp and a thump.

"You really should take a lesson in manners," snarled Ed, his golden eyes snapping in anger.

“Okay that’s it. Hey, PTBs, is there anyway to forewarn any fandom we go to about Ed’s automail so that we don’t spent have the time there explaining it?” Jaden asked exasperatedly to the sky.

{AND SPOIL SOME OF OUR FUN?}

“You ever want to work out me getting laid again?” She retorted meanly.

{SOME PEOPLE HAVE NO SENSE OF HUMOR.}

Jaden just growled and glared up.

Kurama smiled. "It depends on what you consider humor," he remarked.

{FINE. WE'LL HAVE OTHERS KNOW WHAT AUTOMAIL IS, BUT YOU REALIZE THIS WILL ALSO MAKE A FEW OF THOSE PEOPLE HIGHLY CURIOUS TO SEE IT.}

Jaden snorted, “Yeah and if they get pushy about it, I’m sure they’ll see it up close and painfully personal.”

That got a laugh out of Kurama as Ed rejoined them on the porch, leaving Kuwabara sitting on the ground holding his head with a groan. "Don't worry. I didn't hurt him too badly," sighed Ed at Yukina's worried look.

Instead of replying, she hurried down the steps and over to Kuwabara whom she cooed over as she bandaged his injuries. Hiei's eyes snapped in fury as he watched them.

“Well at least she believed me when I said to go get the kit. Why is it quiet? I don’t hear Yusuke and Genkai anymore,” Jaden observed as she looked around and ignored the faint growling coming from the very pissed firebaby.

"Um, I think the older woman knocked Yusuke unconscious," confessed Al, pointing to where Yusuke was lying in another indentation in the yard as Genkai glared at him before storming off to where they were sitting, casually plopping herself down and pouring a cup of tea.

"What brings all of you to my temple?" she asked after drinking a cup of tea and refilling it.

“I’m a wandering Mary-Sue and this is where they dropped us. What’s gooberboy’s problem now? I thought he had a handle on those new powers of his by now,” Jaden explained with slight bow. Three years of Tae Kwon Do insured that to this day she still bowed to higher ranking people that could kick her ass. It was sensible.

Genkai rolled her eyes. "He didn't realize that demons had heat cycles," she drawled with a shrug. "Besides, that's his excuse for the moment." Dark eyes cut towards an amused Kurama. "I'm surprised you didn't educate him in that information, Fox."

"You are assuming that he would be open to actually listening to me in something as simple as heat cycles or even mating in the Makai," retorted Kurama. "He'd probably be worried that I was trying to hit on him or something." He sighed and shook his head with a smile. "The disadvantages for having a reputation."

Jaden’s eyes widen comically, “Please tell me he isn’t in the middle of one right now. If he is I’m finding Kenshin and hiding behind him until it goes away.” She begged.

Kurama pouted at Jaden. "I'm hurt that you'd rather go for that wanderer instead of me," he pouted before waving it off. "Knowing Yusuke, he's burning it off in fighting."

“Sweetie he won’t try for a free grope.” Jaden explained as she patted Kurama on the cheek before turning to Genkai. “Do you have a bit of forest that doesn’t have creepy crawlies in it free at the moment. Yukina is still sweet enough she doesn’t need to hear the kind of language I really want to use right now?” She asked deceptively calm.

Genkai smirked and pointed to a section of forest. "That way's clear all the way to the pool with the bamboo," she drawled before looking at Kuwabara who was being cooed over by Yukina. "What did that blockhead do now?"

Al sighed into his tea. "My brother's a bit touchy about his height,” he began with an apologetic smile.

“And his age, and his metal and……. Oh to heck with it. Genkai see what Hiei would look like blonde and human,” Jaden snarked as she hopped off the porch and started off towards the woods. “By back in a few.”

Hiei glanced over to where Yusuke was starting to come around and moved over to confront him after one last growling glare at Kuwabara. Genkai glanced at the brothers. "So who are you two?"

"I'm Alphonse Elric and this is my older brother, Edward, who is also the Fullmetal Alchemist," introduced Al with a bright smile. "Jaden was nice enough to take us along while our world got straightened out and she's already stated that if the Fuhrer goes insane, she's going to help our friends relocate here.”

Genkai nodded absently as she stared at them. "Any idea how long you're going to be around?"

Ed shook his head. "Nope. Have no idea when the PTB will get bored with us being here and move us again.”

About ten minutes and one startled flock of birds later Jaden reappeared looking like she felt much better. She went over and snuggled her way between the brothers and chirped, “Okay. I feel better now. What did I miss?”

Kurama smirked. "Hiei dragging Yusuke off for a match while Yukina helped 'poor' Kuwabara inside to put ice on his wounds," he replied with a slight shrug, eyeing the brothers and wondering how they would look in his bed, not realizing that his green eyes had gained some gold.

“Fighting. Right. Is that what they’re calling it these days?” Jaden wisecracked as she turned to glance at Kurama and caught the gold. “Kurama, honey, you’re shifting.” She continued casually.

Kurama chuckled. "I do not think that Hiei could see Yusuke in any way but an opponent,” he replied before smirking. "Afraid I might scare off your pets?" Silver was starting to streak the red hair now.

“Don’t know.” Jaden hopped off the porch so she could see all three of them. “Guys what if I tell you that demons exist here and Kurama is what’s knows as a kitsune?” She asked the brothers matter of factually with a gesture towards the shifting fox.

"Are they anything like the demons that Spike and Mr. Giles told us about?" asked Al as Ed watched Kurama with a wary curiosity.

"What's a kitsune?" asked Ed as silver completely overtook the red and pointed fox ears emerged.

“That’s about to finish being a kitsune. They’re fox spirits or demons. It’s one of those depends on who you talk to things. Most demons are fairly nasty and mean and should be run away from as fast as your legs can carry you but some are like Kurama and Hiei. He’s a fire demon.” Jaden answered as she watched their reactions.

Kurama chuckled as he finished shifting to his youko form. The brothers were looking at him with open curiosity. "So you're a demon?" asked Al. "You don't look very demonic or mean."

"I can be quite vicious to those who earn my displeasure," remarked Kurama, holding his arms out to allow the boys to look their fill. "However, my eighteen years as a human has shown me much when it comes to them and I have mellowed some, I guess it could be called.”

“Then he decides he’s curious and horny and kidnaps me one day. Only to find himself kissing door and me jumping out the window on a pleasant little jog,” Jaden giggled as she remembered how she had started this trip.

Kurama sniffed and flicked some silver hair back over his shoulder. "You say that like it's a bad thing," he purred with a fanged grin. "I'm sure there's much I could show you and your friends." He glanced at the brothers including them in on his offer. Al squeaked and blushed an adorable shade of red while Ed only sighed and flopped on his back, staring up at the ceiling.

Jaden just fell on the ground laughing her ass off at Ed’s reaction. “What’s the matter Ed? I thought you wanted to learn what to do with a female or male for that matter.” She teased from her spot in the grass.

"Yeah but everyone keeps saying they'll do it and then we either get whisked off or it doesn't happen," he grumbled.

“Well, I would have started some of it last night but *someone* fell asleep in the shower,” Jaden revealed with an evil smirk.

Ed blushed but glared at her. "Sure, blame me for being exhausted and falling asleep under the first hot shower I've had in a week,” he snarked with a smirk.

“Hey, who’s blamin’? I’m just sayin. And I couldn’t kiss on Al cause I just know that the first strange noise he made I’d get thumped before you woke up,” Jaden retorted mischievously.

Ed pushed himself up to look at her. "We're awake now," he retorted as Genkai stood up and slipped away, leaving the four of them alone on the porch.

“True. And I’ve been bullshitting long enough. Where did you want to start?” Jaden said as she curled up crossed legged on the ground. ‘Can’t fall as far since I have a feeling that just opened up pounce Jaden season.’ She thought to herself as she watched the guys.

Kurama chuckled and draped his arms around her shoulders. "The better question would be your place or mine?" he purred, gesturing to the forest. "It would only take me a few minutes to make a suitable den for us that is not only private but quite comfortable."

Jaden reached back and gently gave his tail a yank and a pet, “Beds, honey. Big, soft, bouncy beds are our friends, remember?”

"My apartment then," agreed Kurama shifting back into his human form. "It's not that far and quite soundproof." He stood up and offered his hands to the brothers who took them, allowing Kurama to pull them to their feet.

“Would anyone be truly pissed if I jinxed us and said that I’d bet even money we run into some kind of problem between here and there that stops this again?” Jaden asked innocently as she started backing up for a head start. “Oops. I guess I just did. My bad.”

Smirking, Kurama dropped his arms around the brothers as they started for the gate. "Actually, the rate of jinxes are down about now," he confessed with a smirk. "And any that did show up would have to deal with a pissed off kitsune."

“Ummm, point. But it’d still be amusing,” Jaden conceded as she fell in beside Ed.

"Would you like me to call Touya and Jin? I believe they're currently annoying Chuu and Rinku," offered Kurama with a smirk. He looked at the darling boys in his arms. "I swear to you both that I will do everything in my power to protect you from any attack while you are with me."

“Hell no!! Don’t you *dare* call that hyperactive little wind demon on crack! You’ll never get me if he shows up. Remember love I’m still slightly bound by the Mary-Sue Code and he’ll want me too.” Jaden reminded the kitsune, then she paused, “You know, I just had a thought. If someone’s traveling with me does the Mary-Sue Code spill over onto them too?”

Kurama frowned slightly. "I'm not sure, but if it's these two, they are quite attractive on their own without needing the Mary-Sue Code," he confessed earning another blush from both boys.

Jaden leered at the boys herself and wiggled her eyebrows, “I know. Why do you think I stole them. I did very good for my second ever character theft.”

"Second? Who was your first?" inquired Kurama as they entered his apartment building and made their way up to the second floor where his apartment was located.

“Oh, I stole Ranma from his fandom cause everyone in it kept trying to kill him, literally. They didn’t even care that they were systematically beating the poor boy to death. So I asked if he could tag along with me. I left him with Inuyasha, which was the next fandom we hit. Last I saw those two were getting along well.” Jaden explained casually.

"It must be interesting to be able to hop fandoms like that," sighed Kurama with a slight wistfulness as he slipped his shoes off inside the door. "The different people to meet, the fun to experience."

“The never knowing when you’re hopping to the next one. The running from horny characters if your rating isn’t high enough,” Jaden continued teasingly as she followed suit, leaving her shoes beside his and motioning for the boys to do the same.

Al slipped his boots off quickly with Ed being a bit slower as they both stared around the apartment that also looked a bit like a greenhouse with the various plants scattered around the rooms. "Perhaps, but it would be more of an adventure than what I currently have," remarked Kurama with a slight shrug. "I do love my human mother dearly, but fighting only the demons foolish enough to slip across the barrier gets tiresome after a while. Especially when there's no one to come home to."

“My dear, kitsune, are you trying to hint that when we shift you’d like to come with us? I’m not sure the PTBs could juggle four of us,” Jaden teased with a bit of regret at the end.

"I'm not sure if I want to come with you or just get out of this rut I've found myself in," he confessed. "The monotony of my present life is getting dull, and there's one thing that's dangerous is a bored kitsune."

“Ummm, yes that’s nearly as dangerous as a bored Mary-Sue,” Jaden conceded with a twinkle in her eyes and she watched the brothers wander around the room.

"I've never seen so many strange plants before," Al breathed, reaching out to touch one only to jerk his hand back when the plant snapped at him out of reflex.

Kurama chuckled and strolled over to them. "Many of these plants are from the Makai and are defensive as well as lovely," he explained, dropping his arms around their shoulders again and steering them towards his bedroom, glancing at Jaden with a clear invitation in his eyes.

“Follow the waving tail. God, Jaden, that was bad! Even for you,” She berated herself with a head shake as she followed the guys.

"I don't lift my tail for just *anyone*," sniffed Kurama as he left the brothers to light a couple of spicy scented candles and drew the curtains for a bit more privacy. "So, what exactly do you wish to learn?"

Jaden got settled on the bed and waved for the boys to arrange themselves however they wanted.

Ed sighed and stood before Kurama. "I'm fifteen and Al's fourteen. Up until two days ago, Al was a spirit inside a suit of armor and I was blindly chasing after a Philosopher's Stone to give him back his body," he explained. "Neither one of us is really any good with getting along with people and it doesn't help that I'm the youngest State Alchemist to be certified in history."

Kurama nodded and placed a gentle hand under Ed's chin. "So you wish to learn all that I know about loving both the male and the female form, is that correct?" Ed blushed a bright red but nodded even as Al sat next to Jaden with a blush of his own. Emerald eyes searched out Jaden. "Will you object to assisting with their education?"

“Ummm. Let’s see. One girl, three guys and the girl writes slash. Gee, however will I stand it?” Jaden mocked as she gave Kurama a ‘you dumbass’ look. “The only reason you didn’t get me the first time was the rating wasn’t high enough and letting the reader have a sex scene right off the bat ruins the fic.”

Kurama nodded in understanding. "I had not known how many fandoms you had gone through at that point, only that you were desirable and I was curious," he remarked before focusing his attention on Ed and leaning down to gently kiss the blond alchemist, earning him a startled gasp at the light caress.

Slipping his hand around the back of the blonde’s head, Kurama deepened the kiss as he slowly moved Ed back towards the bed, stopping just before they fell onto it to slide his hands under the still-open tunic jacket, slipping it down Ed's arms. Ed flinched slightly when Kurama's hand trailed over his automail and Kurama pulled back to gaze into those golden eyes. "This is nothing to be ashamed of,” he whispered, trailing his fingers from the metal shoulder to twine their hands together, flesh and metal.

"I don't like pity or sympathy," Ed growled, his eyes flashing a challenge and Kurama smirked.

"Those are two emotions that I rarely indulge in," he stated, unbraiding Ed's hair with his free hand before burying his hand in those golden tresses. "First lesson. You are gorgeous and should be proud of your body. Undressing your lover is one of the many forms of foreplay." Reaching down, he grasped Ed's other hand, pulled the gloves off and placed those hands on his chest, waiting for Ed to make the next move.

Ed looked up in those green eyes and smirked as he lifted his hands off of Kurama's chest. Kurama yelped at the blue lightning that spilled from Ed's hands and turned his clothes to streamers of cloth. "There, much easier," smirked Ed as he replaced his hands on Kurama's chest.

Al giggled. "Ed could never do anything the normal way," he explained as Jaden cackled into his shirt. "Not if it would get some shock value."

Jaden calmed down and twinkled up at Al. “You know, I only bite hard when properly begged. You can put your arms around me. I’ve been told I’m nicely squishy.”

Al blushed and wrapped his arms around Jaden, snuggling into her like she was a teddy bear. Shaking his head, Kurama stepped back slightly and spread his arms, letting both boys look their fill and get comfortable with him, Ed blushed slightly but ran his hands over Kurama's torso, lightly tracing the faded scar on Kurama's stomach and jumped, startled, when the muscles twitched under his hand.

Kurama smiled at Ed and placed his hands on Ed's waist. "Hardly fair for me to be the only one undressed in this room,” he teased, playfully, as he glanced at Al and Jaden on his bed.

Jaden blinked innocent eyes and replied sweetly, “I’m a teddy bear. Why should I have to worry about clothes?”

Kurama chuckled as he slipped Ed's sleeveless shirt off. "You may be a teddy bear now, my dear, but you will get just as sweaty as the rest of us before the day's over," he promised before kissing Ed again. The boy was really quite addictive and he groaned as the cooler metal hand slid around his waist.

Al slipped out of his shirt too, his blush spreading down his chest as he watched his brother and Kurama with almost hungry eyes. Kurama's hands dropped to the fastenings of Ed's pants and in a few quick movements, the leather was pooled around Ed's ankles along with his boxers. "How can you wear boxers under leather and not leave any lines?" asked Kurama in surprise.

Ed only smirked and stepped out of his pants, toeing his socks off. "Talent,” he replied, tipping his face up for another of those incredible kisses. Carefully, Kurama eased Ed down on the bed before following him down to claim another kiss, his hand tracing where metal met flesh and Ed moaned, arching up into that touch.

Jaden groaned and dropped her head back down on Al's chest and whimpered, "Al, be a dear and remind me that getting out of this bed to hunt for pen and paper so I can take notes is rude."

{RELAX, WE'RE KEEPING NOTES FOR YOU.}

"Cool. Thank you." She muttered as she started nuzzling.

Slowly, Kurama kissed his way down Ed's body, slender fingers mapping out every muscle before tweaking his nipple even as his other hand caressed the edge of the metal that ran almost completely to the center of Ed's chest.

Ed moaned louder and arched up into the caress before whimpering when Kurama chuckled and continued his journey down the pale skin. Before Ed could realize where he was heading, Kurama placed his hands on Ed's hips as he swallowed Ed's hardness, bracing himself for the sudden movement his actions are sure to cause.

Yelping in surprise, Ed's hips bucked before he moaned and seemed to sink into the bed, his hands coming up to bury themselves in Kurama's crimson mane as the human kitsune proved just how much talent he had developed over his life.

Al reached over, abandoning Jaden for the moment to run his fingers down Ed's metal arm and untangle the automail hand from Kurama's hair before gently placing it next to Ed on the covers, Hazy golden eyes met amused amber before Ed cried out, his back arching ad he came.

Kurama sat back on his heels, smirking at the sight of Ed laid out before him in a pleasant haze, all his limbs relaxed and sprawled out in an invitation to be ravished, and it took quite a bit of Kurama's willpower not to just fall on the young man and devour him.

Ed smirked and stretched some. "That was nice, but was that all?" he asked, getting a quiet chuckle from Kurama.

"Not in the least, my dear Ed," purred Kurama. "That was just the beginning. I was going to give you a few minutes to catch your breath and recover before moving on to the next part."

“I wonder. If I reached over and pet his hair right now, do you think he’d purr,” Jaden mused teasingly as she put action to thought and started running her hand through Ed’s bangs.

Ed's eyes dipped partially closed and a soft humm slipped out of him as he leaned into the caress like a cat, greedy for the attention.

Jaden just giggled and kept petting.

Kurama turned to gaze at Al and smiled at the shy boy, drawing him closer before repeating the lesson with him, leaving him as relaxed as his brother in about ten minutes.

Kurama smirked at the lovely boys and reached over to grab a glass bottle off of his night stand. "And now on to the second lesson," he purred, opening it and pouring a bit of oil into his hand before setting the bottle safely to one side. Quickly, he maneuvered the brothers so that they could watch as he lay on his back and slicked his own fingers. Reaching between his legs, Kurama easily stretched himself, teasing both himself and his soon to be lovers with slow, teasing strokes.

"Ed, come here," gasped Kurama, almost writhing on his own fingers. Hesitantly, the older brother moved over to Kurama, gasping when an oil-slicked hand ran over his hardness. "Always remember that if you wish to have sex anally to always have something slick and harmless to ease the way." With that, he maneuvered Ed between his legs and impaled himself in a smooth move that caused both of them to groan.

"Always... give your partner a few minutes to adjust," gasped Kurama, his chest heaving as he forced his body to relax. It had been *too* long since he had last been in this position and he had forgotten how much he enjoyed it. "Move, Edward. Please!"

Groaning Ed's hips began moving slowly at first and then with more speed as Kurama thrust back against him with growing force. Ed fell forward, bracing his hands on the bed as his hips slammed into Kurama's, eliciting moans and cries of pleasure as the redhead writhed under him, slender fingers rising to skitter across flesh and metal to tease scar tissue and cause Ed to groan as well.

Rearing up, Kurama closed his lips around Ed's nipple, teasing it with teath and tonuge, his hands never stopping their caresses, driving the boy to a frenzy of pleasure. Ed was babbling and whimpering now, his movements jerky and erratic signalling his approaching release when Kurama ran his tongue along the juncture of smooth metal and sweaty skin. Unable to resist the sensation overload, Ed screamed again as he slammed hard into Kurama, spilling his release into the willing body before he slumped with a faint groan.

Kurama whimpered slightly as Ed moved sluggishly, stimulating his over sensitive nerves without really trying. "Ed, if you'll cuddle with Jaden, I'll give Al his turn,' murmured Kurama, the glazed look in his eyes indicating his passioned state.

Jaden held out her arms and cooed, “Come ‘ere Sexy.”

Groaning, Ed forced his body to move, slipping out of Kurama as he almost fell back against Jaden and Kurama held out a hand to Al, inviting the teen to take his brother's place. Al reached for the bottle of oil only to be stopped by Kurama's hands and a small shake of his head. "That's not necessary at this time," he murmured, leaning up to kiss Al as he pulled the pale blond towards him, sighing in delight as he was filled once more.

Al groaned into Kurama's mouth as he started slowly rocking his hips, Kurama's hands coming up to play with pert brown nipples before he brought his mouth in to play with them as well, causing Al to moan and groan almost nonstop.

One of Kurama's hands snaked between their writhing bodies to encircle his own neglected erection and he moaned in delight. A quick flex of his body and Kurama had both knees hooked over Al's shoulders, a strange bark-like yelp falling from his lips as Al found that small nub on the next thrust.

"Inari, yes, harder, faster," breathed Kurama, his red hair flared out around him in a corona as Al started moving faster, his hips snapping forward with increasing force, his pale blond hair falling around his face and sticking to his sweaty skin and Kurama groaned, arching into Al's thrusts as his own climax crashed over him. Al gave a choked gasp of surprise, his head flying up as he slammed himself into Kurama one last time before slumping sideways with Kurama's tan legs sliding off his shoulders.

Jaden eased Ed over to Kurama’s side and let him cuddle there while she helped untangle Al an put him on Kurama’s other side. Then she got up and went into the kitchen, bringing back drinks and nibbles for everyone once they got their breath back.

Weakly, Kurama pulled the boys closer in his arms, smiling softy when he felt Ed's metal hand tangle with his brother's hand before they rested on his chest, all were perfectly content to stay there for a while, even though Kurama could feel their release slipping out of him and he grimaced. "Need to get cleaned up," he muttered, making no movements to do so.

Ed and Al just cuddled a bit closer, their hands tightening briefly, content not to move for the first time in a while.

Kurama opened an eye and gazed at Jaden, one hand leaving Al's back to gesture at the side of the bed. "Jaden, I have some handtowels stashed under the bed," he murmured with a small smile. "Could you help me a bit since I have a delightful pair of bodies determined to soak up all my heat?"

“Sure.” She chirped with a grin as she went and got a bowl of warm water too.

When she returned, Kurama managed to move his legs to allow her to clean him up without waking the boys from the slight doze they had fallen into.

“Are we a happier kitsune now?” She teased as she carefully started cleaning.

Kurama purred under her gentle touch. "I am, but you're probably a bit tense from all the watching," he teased. "Give me a few to try and get out from between them and I'll do my best to correct that problem.”

Once Jaden had put the bowl and towel off to one side, Kurama carefully extracted himself from the brothers, smiling as they cuddled together with Ed wrapping himself protectively around Al. "Adorable, aren't they?" he murmured, wrapping gentle arms around her as he nuzzled her neck.

Jaden just hummed and tilted her head to give him better access. “Now you see why I swiped them.”

He chuckled and licked her throat before moving to kneel before her, drawing her up into his arms as he claimed her mouth in a deep kiss. "Which would you prefer, the human or the youko?" he asked, pulling back long enough for her to answer.

“Either. Both. I’m a mild trisexual sweetie. I’ll try most anything sexual at least once and go back and repeat what I like,” Jaden said as she leaned in and nuzzled his neck for a bit.

Kurama chuckled and tilted his head, allowing her access to his neck as his hands trailed down to her waist before slipping her shirt off. A flick of his wrist and her bra was on the ground with the growing pile of clothes. "Naughty Jaden, not joining us," he purred, unfastening her jeans and sliding them off with a sweep of his hands removing her underwear at the same time, leaving her bare to his hungry gaze.

“Hey. If I wasn’t being snuggled I was to busy watching,” She snarked as she lightly bit him on the shoulder.

Gathering her up in his arms again, Kurama claimed her mouth in a deep kiss as he laid her down on his bed next to the brothers who were starting to stir. Trailing his hands down her arms, he caught her wrists and raised her hands above her head, mentally calling one of his vines to hold her wrists there, the vines' grip just enough to keep her arms pinned there. "Now I have you, my buxomest beauty," he purred.

“The question is: What do you think you’re going to do to me,” Jaden cracked as she wiggled.

"Drive you crazy with pleasure before satisfying you again and again is a good place to start," he remarked, dragging his fingers lightly up her leg, glancing at the brothers who were mostly awake. Ed had turned so that his back was pressed against Al's chest and the younger brother had his arms wrapped around Ed as they watched with almost matching golden eyes. "We're being watched,” he whispered in her ear before nipping slightly at the skin right below her ear, earning a shiver. "What do you think of that?"

Kurama purred as his eyes flashed gold briefly before returning to a gold-green mix as he kissed his way down her skin, savoring the taste of her before pausing at her breasts. He gently nipped at her one breast with slightly sharper than normal teeth before soothing the sting away with long sweeps of his tongue as his other hand came up to play with her other nipple, causing her to arch into his hands with a moan. She whimpered a bit in disappointment as his hand slid from her breast, trailing slowly down her side to slip between her legs, teasing and stroking her there as he continued playing with the nipple in his mouth.

Moaning, she spread her legs wider, silently granting him permission, and he chuckled deep in his throat as he moved between her legs, teasing her with his mouth as he continued to tease her with his fingers, driving her crazy with his light touches and caresses. A slight sound caught his attention and he looked up to find Ed and Al were leaning forward, curiosity warring with desire on their faces. Raising his other hand, Kurama beckoned them forward as he continued to lick and tease Jaden.

Jaden opened an eye when she felt the bed shift and panted, “Come on over boys. I don’t mind being an educational tool. Play all you want. Touch anywhere you want.”

Kurama pulled away as Ed and AL settled next to them and smirked as he snagged their hands, pulling them down to replace his own and showing them how to tease her as he went back to his licking.

The boys were hesitant at first but soon, grew confident as she writhed and moaned under their combined assault. Ed shifted to her other side, kissing her deeply as Al and Kurama continued to tease her when she cried out in Ed's mouth before going limp. "Wonderful thing about women is that they're designed for multiple orgasms," remarked Kurama, pulling back as he licked his lips. "Delicious as well."

Jaden just sighed after Ed released her lips and quipped, “I’m going to be a happy little toy.”

Al was staring at Kurama in fascination before kissing the redhead, moaning at the taste that exploded across his taste buds. In a few seconds, Ed was there, wanting a kiss of his own and Kurama was more than willing to share with him. Pulling back, Kurama smiled at the boys before digging into the bedside table to remove two foil-wrapped items. "Another thing you should know is that you should only have unprotected sex if you have been with the same partner for over a month and both of you check out clean for sexually transmitted diseases," he replied before winking at the boys. "Don't worry about that part. I know you three are clean and I just had my annual physical a few days ago."

Tearing open the package, Kurama held up the condom for the boys to see before moving so they could watch him roll the latex down Ed's erection, getting a moan from the boy. He repeated the process on Al before stealing a kiss from the boys. He then maneuvered Jaden on her side, one hand snaking between them to gently prepare her for the double assault he had planned, causing her to writhe and moan under his skillful touch.

"Ed, come here," instructed Kurama, maneuvering the teen until he was in front of Jaden and them placing Al behind her as he lifted up her leg to give the boys more room. "Now, ease into her and give her a chance to adjust."

With a bit of maneuvering, both easily slid into her, causing all three to moan in delight and Kurama curled her leg around Ed's hips before encouraging Al to move by stroking a hand down his back, causing him to arch into the touch. Soon, Ed was imitating his brother and they developed a rhythm.

"Beautiful," sighed Kurama, standing up to look down on them. All that blond hair and long limbs was a sight to behold. He knelt next to Jaden's head and stroked her cheek to get her attention. She looked up at him and smirked before lunging forward to envelope his hardness, causing him to groan and thrust into her mouth, adding to the pleasure the brothers were causing her.

For the next several minutes, moans, groans and the sounds of flesh hitting flesh filled the room before it finally grew to be too much for Jaden, With a muffled cry, she came again, dragging the three teens with her as her body contracted around them. Ed and Al cried out before falling limp against her while Kurama let out a muffled groan. The redhead managed to catch himself before he fell on any of them, summoning the willpower to retract the vines from around Jaden's wrists, and grabbed at the bowl of water and towels, quickly cleaning them up and disposing of the condoms. Then he rolled the brothers together in the center with Jaden behind Al and he snuggled in behind Ed, drawing a light cover over them to keep off the faint chill that was starting to infuse the air.

It was hard to say how long they had been dozing when Kurama felt the presence of another demon enter his room, and he smiled with he recognized it, opening his eyes as he turned to look at Touya. "Good evening, Touya,” he greeted, blinking in surprise at the emotionless mask on the Ice Master's face.

"Kurama, I didn't realize that you had company," replied Touya as he turned back to the window. "I'll see you later." Kurama slipped out of the bed, unconcerned about his nudity as he approached the other demon.

"What is the matter, Touya?" he asked, concern slipping into his voice.

"It's nothing,” lied Touya, starting towards the window again only to jump slightly when plants suddenly enveloped the window, blocking the Ice Master's escape.

"Do not lie to me, Ice Master Touya," warned Kurama, his voice bordering on a growl. "I do not let my allies and friends lie to me. They learn to regret it."

Touya turned, his eyes hard as the element he controlled. "I'm now an ally and friend? Strange how you forgot to inform me of that," he retorted, sounding a bit childish, before his eyes glanced to the bed. "But I can see how busy you've been."

Kurama snorted and folded his arms across his chest. "Who I take to my bed is no concern of yours since you have never expressed an interest in occupying it," he stated, hearing the rustling of his bed companions and felt a slight twinge that this argument woke them up.

Instead of replying, Touya stalked across the floor, grabbed Kurama's shoulders and placed a deep, claiming kiss on his lips as his hands moved up to bury themselves in his flaming hair.

Jaden blinked open her eyes in time to see someone vaguely familiar kiss the hell out of Kurama, “Oh, hey. Another toy. Cool. Dude, once you get done kissing strip off and climb in, we don’t bite…….. Much.” She called over with a grin and a snuggle back down into her teddy bears.

The sudden action took Kurama by surprise and he panicked, feelings from over a millennium ago rising up and threatening to sweep him under. A thorned vine erupted from his hair in response to his panic and wrapped around Touya's wrists, forcing the Ice Master to release his hold on Kurama's hair before being shoved backwards by the rose vines.

Kurama trembled as he wrapped his arms around his waist and glared at Touya. "*I* decide who shares my bed, Ice Master," he spat, desperately trying to shove the memory of unwanted hands on his body back into the dark corners of his mind where it belonged. "The last who forced his way into my bed didn't live long enough to regret it!”

Jaden’s head snapped up at that and she nearly teleported to his side, “Easy Kurama. I don’t think he meant it like that. I think the poor guy’s just been so frustrated that he got a little out of control.”

Kurama visibly flinched from Jaden’s sudden action before desperately trying to pull himself together and hide his emotions behind the calm mask he always wore, not realizing that his trembling was becoming more visible.

Touya carefully and cautiously approached them, stopping far enough away that he couldn't touch Kurama. "Who forced you into their bed, Kurama?" He asked, his voice soft but the glint in his eyes promised a slow and messy death for the one who hurt this beautiful being.

Kurama shook his head and buried his hands in his hair, not wanting to acknowledge Touya's words.

“Alright, that does it. Kurama go climb back into bed between the boys. Boys, if you’re awake your mission is to cuddle him to death.” Jaden ordered as she steered Kurama back to the bed and got him settled. “You are to strip down and pick a side. Once Kurama calms down some you can finish your talk.” She continued as she pointed at Touya.

Kurama curled up in a miserable ball between the brothers as Ed and Al wrapped themselves around him, whispering soothing words as they stroked and petted his hair and arms. Touya felt a stab of jealousy at the sight of the beautiful Kurama nestled between the brothers.

"It doesn't look like he needs me," he muttered, turning back towards the blocked window, ready to use his ice to get out of the apartment that smelled strongly of Kurama and sex.

Jaden grabbed the back of his shirt. “Did I say you could leave? No. I said you were to strip down and climb in. You’ll get your chance for fox cuddles after he calms down. Now move,” she ordered as she forcibly turned the little Ice Master around and shoved him towards one side of the bed and moved to block the window.

Touya blinked in surprise at the woman before shivering slightly at the determined look in her eyes. He had a feeling that if he didn't strip and join them in the bed, his clothes would be torn off him and he'd be thrown into the bed. Quickly, he slipped out of his clothes and slipped into the bed behind the brother with the metal arm, blinking in surprise when his foot slid across a metal leg.

Ed glared at Touya and moved a bit closer to Kurama, apparently ready to protect the fox from Touya if necessary. Jaden just sighed and crawled in on the other side of Al.

After a few minutes, Kurama finally relaxed enough to uncurl between the brothers and turned to snuggle into Ed's chest, sighing softly when arms encircled him. "Do you want to talk about it, Kurama?" Al offered, running a hand through his red hair.

"What's to tell? I was young and was caught by a group of mercenaries," he stated in a flat voice, his green eyes haunted. "That was also when I learned how to control plants and slaughtered them."

Touya reached over and gently stroked the crimson hair. "No one has the right to treat you like that, Kurama," he murmured. "Had I known, I would not have acted as I did. I apologize."

Kurama shrugged his shoulder. "It was over a thousand years ago. It doesn't matter," he stated, his voice still flat.

“It’s still hurting you so it matters. Cuddle harder boys he’s still not completely current,” Jaden growled from Al’s back.

Ed pulled Kurama closer to him, almost snarling when the redhead allowed himself to be manipulated without any resistance and Touya slipped his arms around Ed and Kurama, keeping his hands above the redhead's waist as Al snuggled in closer to Kurama's back. They stroked and petted Kurama, determined to surround him in the warmth of caring bodies.

Something wet trickled down Kurama's cheek and he raised a hand, wiping off and staring in surprise at the water that glittered on his skin. A few seconds later, another tear fell from emerald eyes and he frowned in confusion.

Al smiled and gently brushed red hair out of Kurama's face. "What's wrong? Haven't cried before?" he asked softly.

"Not that I remember," confessed Kurama in a confused voice as the tears started falling faster and faster.

"You're safe, Kurama, none of us will hurt you," Touya murmured, stroking hair and soft skin with firm caresses.

Jaden added her own hand to the petting. “Yeah what he said. Oh. And the next time you scare him like that you’re going to watch me try on your guts as garters. Got me?” She growled at Touya with a sweet smile.

Touya nodded. "I had not meant to scare him,” he confessed. "Kurama is always so calm and in control of himself and his surroundings that it seems hard to even imagine him being forced like that.”

There was a faint murmured protest from Kurama before his eyes drifted shut as he slowly fell asleep, surrounded by people who were his friends.

“Glad we understand each other. Now, not to be rude or anything but is there a possible chance in hell that we can lighten the mood a bit? I don’t do depressed very well or rather I should say I do it *to* well,” Jaden whined quietly as she sat up a little.

Touya looked over at her. "How would you suggest we lighten the mood?" he inquired.

“Well, what exhausted us earlier was Kurama and I teaching the boys about sex. The both of us got laid very thoroughly and enjoyably. You want to help any?” Jaden asked innocently as she sat up fully and tilted her head.

Touya looked at the boys. "If it was your first time, then you are lucky to have Youko Kurama as a teacher," remarked Touya, sitting up as well with a small smile. "He is well known for his love of beauty in any form."

Ed snorted and shook his head. "You're delusional," he declared, staring at the blue haired Ice Master. "Jaden and Al, yeah, they're gorgeous. But me..." He gestured to his body with his left hand, drawing attention to his automail.

“First of all,” Jaden leaned over and kissed Ed. “Thank for the complement. Second, don’t make me unhook that arm of yours and beat you with it. Or haven’t you figured out yet that I pay more attention to you than I do poor Al?” She pointed out with an apologetic glance towards the younger brother.

Al giggled as Ed blushed. "It's alright Jaden," Al stated. "My brother may be a genius when it comes to alchemy, but his self esteem definitely needs some work."

“Yeah. He definitely seems to be suffering from Xander Syndrome. But hey, if it can be trained out of the originator then it can be trained out of Ed,” Jaden chirped with a mock look of sadness.

Touya gently touched Ed's metal shoulder and dragged his fingers down the automail arm. "If you think that this makes you unattractive, then I should take you to the Makai some time," he stated. "Beauty is all in the eye of the beholder and there are some creatures in the Makai, as well as some demons, that make a porcupine look like a beauty queen."

“Hey. I think porcupines are cute. As long as they stay out of firing range. But then again there aren’t that many animals that I don’t think are cute so…..,” Jaden admitted with a grin.

Touya chuckled and pulled a blanket up to tuck around Kurama’s shoulders when he started to shiver slightly. "So what has Kurama taught you?"

Both boys blushed and avoided everyone's gaze as the blush spread down their chests.

“Aren’t they adorable? Well, if I remember correctly both boys were treated to blowjobs and then Kurama prepared himself and had both of them take turns taking him. Then they passed out for a bit and Kurama started playing with me, which woke them back up, and I became a wrists tied up, happy little sex ed. tool,” Jaden dutifully reported with a bit of a shiver as she remembered.

"That was certainly thorough," mused Touya with a smirk as he gazed at the boys. Al ducked his head but Ed met his eyes despite the blush. "There is still a great deal to teach such beauties as yourself. I do not mind becoming a learning tool." He stretched out on the bed, his hands raised above his head, giving silent permission for them to explore his body.

Ed and AL hesitantly glanced at Jaden.

Jaden made a small shooing motion, “Go ahead. If he’s willing let him have some fun. I’m sure he’ll tell you if he doesn’t like something.” She looked at the demon. “Want me to tie you up? I can and still have it secure enough to feel right and you can still get yourself loose.” She asked helpfully.

Touya shook his head. "No, thank you," he stated with a small smile. "Too many times of being tied up in an unfun way," he explained as the boys hesitantly touched him, Al's hand finding the old scar on his stomach, causing Touya to twitch. "Sorry, slightly ticklish there."

"What happened?" asked Al, tracing the scar with a firmer touch. "It looks like you were stabbed."

"That was from the Dark Tournament," announced Touya with a rueful chuckle. "It is a reminder in a way not to underestimate Kurama."

At the boys' curious looks, Touya sat up and faced them. "One thing you should know about the Dark Tournament is that it is often fought between demons and most of the time the losers of the match end up dead. Very few actually survive."

He smiled and folded his legs in a lotus position. "Two members of Kurama's team had been tricked into a forcefield, thus rendering them unable to fight while a third member was too badly injured to fight since they had just finished up a previous battle only seconds before they were called to fight my team."

"But that's not fair," protested Ed and Al in one voice.

“Chayeah. They’re demons. Most of them don’t care about fair, they care about surviving however they can,” Jaden snorted.

Touya held up his hands. "They were the so-called guest team and had made a bit of a name for themselves fighting demons and so everyone was out to take them down and be known as the one who defeated the Spirit Detective and his allies," he explained. "Gama was the first one to face off against Kurama, and used his paint to tie down Kurama's arms and legs, making it impossible for him to move, but he didn't contain Kurama's powers, which lead to Kurama severely injuring him with the hair tentacle trick he used a bit ago. Gama continued struggling despite Kurama's orders for him not to, and he died of blood loss. But not before he had used his blood to contain Kurama's powers." Touya smiled slightly in remembrance.

"That was the secret to his paints. His power was in his blood and he used it to secure us a victory over one of the deadlier members of Team Urameshi. I step onto the stage, ready to take Kurama out before the blood curse wears off, and he manages to defend himself against my ice storm and tried to wipe out the curse with his own blood to no avail. Then, he did something completely unexpected, desperate and almost suicidal. The curse bound his powers to his skin, not letting him extend them past that to control his plants. However, I had managed to cut his arms with my ice and while he distracted me with talking, he slipped one of his seeds into his injury, allowing his powers to touch it that way. I moved in for the kill, thinking that it was over only to find my ice blade caught on his vines as his own blade of vines punctured my stomach. I was down and the round went to him, but for a few seconds, it seemed like he had won only to die, but he had merely passed out from exhaustion." Touya tossed an exasperating smile at the sleeping fox. "It took him a few hours to coax the vine out of his body, and it didn't help that a less than honorable member of my team decided that since Kurama was still standing, he was fair game for a punching bag." Touya chuckled. "He was soon taught the difference by Urameshi."

“Okay. Note to self: When you get home find that story arc and watch it,” Jaden muttered just loud enough to be heard.

Touya glanced at Jaden curiously. "I don't understand that comment," he invited, his tone asking for more information from her.

“I’m what’s known as a wandering Mary-Sue. I’m not actually from this reality, or from my perspective, fandom. See back home this reality is a manga that was turned into an anime called Yu Yu Hakusho that a friend of mine got me interested in. Same with Ed and Al. Theirs was called Fullmetal Alchemist,” Jaden explained nonchalantly.

Ed smirked and leaned back on his hands. "Seems appropriate that it's named for me, don't ya think, Al?" he asked a bit smug. Al only rolled his eyes and shoved his brother into Touya who wrapped his arms automatically around the young teen.

"Very interesting, but I believe we have been distracted from what we were originally doing," remarked Touya, bending down to claim Ed's mouth in a gentle kiss.

“Easiest way to shut someone up,” Jaden giggled.

Touya laid back down and held a hand out to Jaden. "Do you wish to assist them?" He inquired as Ed and Al went back to exploring his body with their hands and eyes.

“Naw. I’ll let them play,” she gently refused as she settled in to watch again. “I’m a bit of a voyeur if those to haven’t figured it out yet.”

Touya chuckled and relaxed under the curious petting of the brothers. Ed leaned down to steal a kiss as Al's hands moved down to the Ice Master's waist to rest low on his abdomen. "How come you don't have any hair down here?" he asked, his eyes wide with curiosity.

"From my understanding, very rarely do those with the power of ice or fire have hair other than on their head," remarked Touya with a smile as he arched slightly into Al's innocent touch. "It is just the way things are.”

Jaden tilted her head to one side and asked innocently, “I’ve always wondered. Do fire and ice demons have hotter or cooler bodily fluids and if they do and you hold that idea to Kurama would he be minty fresh?”

Touya chuckled and held out a hand, trailing cool fingers down her arm. "Fire demons are hotter than what humans consider average while ice demons are cooler," he replied with a smirk. "As for Kurama, I have not been privileged enough to discover the answer to your question."

“Nifty. And now you know why I never let my mind out to play without a collar and a leash,” Jaden snarked with a grin.

Ed grinned. "But it's so much fun to play with," he pouted with his eyes dancing, before his metal hand trailed down Touya's chest to wrap around the Ice Master's erection, causing him to swear softly and buck into that metal grip.

Al snickered slightly before glancing back at Kurama who appeared to be sleeping still.

“Sweetie you haven’t *even* seen what my dirty little mind can come up with. Research and the internet are wonderful things. I’m certain that the only things I *won’t * try even once are scat play and necrophilia, which is having sex with a dead body.” Jaden warned Ed as she lifted Al’s hand and gently laid in on Kurama’s stomach. “I doubt he’s really asleep and you can keep it to just gentle petting if you want.” She assured the boy.

Kurama stirred under Al's touch and blinked open green eyes, fear flashing in them briefly before he woke up enough to remember where he was and stretched before smiling up at the young alchemist, who was still stroking the soft skin only to frown at the almost matching scar on Kurama's stomach.

"Kurama, when did this happen?" He asked. "I didn't notice it earlier."

Kurama smiled, the mask sliding back across his face easily. "It was when I stepped between Hiei and Yusuke, accepting the blow from the GhostSlayer that was meant for the Detective," he explained, relaxing on the bed and practically purring under Al's caresses. "Then, just when it was healed, we were sent to deal with the Four Saint Beasts of Demon City and Genbu caught me there with his tail before I managed to defeat him.”

Respect was shining in Touya's eyes as he sat up slightly to regard the redhead. "You survived the GhostSlayer and Genbu when you were injured?" he breathed. "You are truly a worthy ally and friend." He carefully held out a hand to Kurama. "And more if you wish."

Kurama studied the Ice Master's face before slowly slipping his hand into Touya's. "If you betray my trust, it will be the last thing you do," warned Kurama as Touya pulled the redhead into his arms as Ed and Al backed off slightly, giving the demons room.

"I would expect nothing less, my fox," murmured Touya into that red hair.

Jaden squeaked and grabbed Ed so she could kiss the hell out of him. Ed squeaked himself, startled, before melting into the kiss.

"What was that for, not that I'm complaining," asked Ed once he came up for air.

“I have the devil’s own worse timing when it comes to my snarking some times and I didn’t want to ruin their moment. So I kissed you to shut me up,” Jaden explained with a grin.

Ed smirked. "Well if *that* was the only reason," he sighed in mock disappointment as he drew away, turning back to his brother and the demons on the bed even as Al stifled a snicker.

Jaden’s eyes narrowed and she shifted around to where she was pressed up against his back with her arms wrapped around him, roaming. “Edward, darling. I’m a tease and a biter are you sure you want to start that game?” She questioned as one hand kept drifting lower and lower on his body while she nipped his ear.

Ed's head rolled to one side as his hips thrust slightly at her touch. "How else are we suppose to learn how to tease?" he asked, his eyes twinkling as he head fell back against her shoulder.

“Ohhhh. So it’s a lesson in teasin’ you’d be wantin’ is it?” She purred into Ed’s neck as she nipped and licked up and down the length. Jaden set her hands to one randomly petting anywhere and everywhere on his front *except* for where he really wanted it and the other one roamed up to pinch and pull at the teen’s nipples.

Ed groaned and tightened his grip on her, forgetting about the automail as she did her best to drive him crazy with her teasing.

Kurama and Touya smiled at Al and drew him into a tangle of limbs as the kissed and stroked him, making sure he wasn't left alone as his brother tried to keep up with Jaden's teasing.

Kurama kissed the young teen as his hands stroked the pale soft skin before pulling back to meet amber eyes, seriously. "You are still a virgin in many aspects," he stated, threading his hand through pale gold hair. "That is something that should only be given away and never stolen through violence. If you wish to give us that gift, then we will humbly accept it. However, if you wish to wait, that will not change your status in our eyes."

Al bit his lip as he sat back and stared at the two demons stretched out before him. Neither one was pushing him, nor had Kurama or Jaden pushed earlier, showing Ed and himself only kindness and pleasure without asking for any in return.

"Brother?" The quiet, confused plea managed to drag Ed back from the pleasurable haze that had enveloped him and he reluctantly pulled out of Jaden's arms to turn and face his brother.

Ed cupped Al's face, metal and flesh framing the beloved features. "It is something that only you can decide, Alphonse," he stated, gold meeting amber. "I won't lie and say that I'm not going to take them up on their offer, because frankly, I can't think of anyone better than Kurama and Jaden. But it has to be your decision and only yours. Don't let my decision influence you."

Jaden leaned in over Ed’s shoulder and gently cooed, “Al. Remember when you were in me?” She waited until he nodded. “Remember how much I liked it? Well, you guys have a wonderful little organ called the prostate that when you are playing like that and it’s hit I’ve read you guys see stars and scream for more. I unfortunately being female don’t have one of those but I still liked it. Would it help if you were sandwiched between two people? That way you can concentrate on the one in front until you get use to the rest of it.” She offered.

Al looked at her before taking a breath and nodding. "I think it might,” he said with a small smile. "I admit that I'm a bit scared, but I know that none of you would hurt us."

“Of course we wouldn’t hurt either of you! If we did that we’d loose our teddy bears,” Jaden gasped in mock outrage, ginning widely. “So who you want in front?”

Al blushed. "I’m not sure, but I know I want Kurama to take me," he admitted, unable to force his blush down and Ed grinned at his brother.

Touya sat up and drew a hand down Ed's arm, chilling his fingers slightly to send shivers down Ed's spine. "There is a way to keep you both distracted at once so that way you can concentrate on yourself instead of worrying yourself into a puddle about your brother," he remarked with a small smile. "If the lady is willing."

“Yeahsureyoubetcha. What did you have in mind?” Jaden chirped as she started playing with Ed again.

"A new meaning to the phrase 'Cluster Fuck'," drawled Touya with a smirk. "Kurama takes Al in hand, so to speak, while I deal with this delightful beauty and you keep both of them distracted with your natural charms."

“Oooo, Jaden in the middle again. I *like* that game. You two want me the same way again or switched? And the sounded much cleaner in my head,” Jaden muttered to herself a little to loudly.

Kurama smirked. "Perhaps you should switch to give Al a chance," he purred before stretching back to grab the bottle of oil and showing off his slender yet muscled form.

“Okay. And at some point I want to play with Youko Kurama. I like fur, it’s soft,” Jaden agreed as she settled down facing Al and started running her fingers through his hair to help calm him.

Kurama chuckled and leaned over Al to kiss her. "I believe that can be arranged after we see to the delightful boys," he purred as he stroked and teased Al into relaxing in his arms. The soft sigh behind Jaden indicated that Ed was getting the same treatment from the Ice Master.

The brothers were encouraged to pay attention to Jaden, stroking, kissing and petting under the directions of the demons until she was a moaning pile of pleasure between them before they eased into her willing body. A groan of delight spilled from her as she threaded her hands through Al's hair, pulling him in for a devouring kiss as she rocked her hips between them.

Kurama tipped some oil into Touya's outstretched hand before gathering some for himself and replacing the bottle on the floor. Slicking himself up, Kurama gently continued stroking and petting Al as he encouraged the young teen to wrap his leg partially around Jaden's hip where it tangled with Ed's. He slipped a single finger into Al, teasing the tight ring of muscle and causing Al to gasp in surprise and rock a bit harder into Jaden.

"Easy precious," whispered Kurama, gently stroking Al as he coaxed the tight muscle to loosen enough for him to slip a second finger in, searching for the small nub. With a smirk, he found it and gently rubbed it and Al cried out in pleasure as he started thrusting back on Kurama's fingers. "Please," he begged, looking back at Kurama with dazed eyes.

Carefully placing himself at Al's entrance, Kurama slipped an arm around the younger teen and slowly pushed his way in, groaning at the muscles that clamped down on him. "Relax, Precious One," soothed Kurama, stroking Al's stomach as the pale blond let out a guttural moan, his head falling back on Kurama's shoulder as his chest heaved.

"Hurts," whispered Al, the small word hanging in the air, and Kurama continued stroking him.

"Try relaxing for me," begged Kurama. "The discomfort will fade. I promise you that.”

“Relax, Sweetling. It does get better,” Jaden added her cooing to Kurama’s as she shifted Al’s head towards her chest. “There. Play with those, they’re lonely.”

Ed sighed in pleasure and opened his eyes to stare at his brother over Jaden's shoulder before reaching out and cupping Al's cheek with a metal hand. "Al, look at me." Amber eyes filled with fear and a touch of pain met calm gold. "Just relax. I'm right here and won't let anything bad to happen to you. Trust me, okay?"

Al nodded, and took a breath, tangling a hand with Ed's metal one as he forced his body to relax even as he buried his face in Jaden’s chest. Kurama sighed in relief when he felt Al relax and slipped farther in, angling to hit the small lump, and grinned with Al cried out again in pleasure.

"Promised it would get better," purred Kurama as he continued stroking the skin under his hands as he peppered Al's shoulder with kisses. When Al moved back towards him, Kurama started moving, urging the teen to move with him and Al groaned in pleasure when he felt himself thrust deeper into Jaden then he had thought possible. He could also feel Ed moving as well, and the knowledge that his brother was experiencing this as well added to the pleasure. Thy had done everything together, save for getting certified as State Alchemists, but that could change later.

Kurama wrapped his fingers around Al's hips as he started moving faster, urging Al to pick up the pace, and bleary amber eyes met dazed golden over Jaden's shoulder again as she babbled happily about nothing. Untangling their hands, Al reached out and drew Ed's face to his, claiming his brother's lips in a heated kiss. Ed groaned into the kiss and melted under Al's hands and lips, willing his brother to take what he wanted from the golden haired teen.

Ed groaned again and shuddered against Jaden, collapsing against her back before shivering as Touya came. A few seconds later Al and Kurama groaned before melting against Jaden. "Give me a few seconds to remember where my brain is and I'll get us some towels," mumbled Kurama only to blink in surprise when towels were dropped on them by a helpful vine.

Jaden cackled at his look of surprise, “I think your plants like you getting laid. Maybe you give off extra energy or something.”

Kurama chuckled tiredly as he cleaned himself and Al up, weathering the startled yelp as over stimulated nerves protested the sudden contact and he carefully checked Al. "You'll be fine," he assured the young teen, stroking the pale blond hair. "A bit sore but that will fade."

Al sighed and nodded, snuggling down into Jaden's shoulder as she moved onto her back, cradling the boys under her arms. Their hands tangled together again before dropping off to sleep. Kurama slowly stood up and took the used towels and the bowl of water into the bathroom to dispose of it and felt the cool aura at his back as Touya approached him to stop a few feet away. "What do you wish to talk to me about, Touya?"

"Nothing much,” replied Ice Master, moving around to stand before Kurama. "You asked me once what we planned to do out here in the world, and I told you that I didn't know, that the Light was the first goal. Do you remember?"

Kurama nodded and met Touya's ice blue gaze with his own calm green one. "I remember. Why bring it up now?"

"Because I have an answer for you finally," confessed the Ice Master, holding his hand out once more. "I would like to get to know you, both the human Shuichi Minamino and the demon Youko Kurama, and form at least a partnership with you if not a mating bond."

"Let's see about the partnership first," replied Kurama, hesitantly slipping his hand in Touya's. "I don't think I'm ready for another mate just yet."

Touya nodded. "Someday you will have to tell me of your other mate," he remarked, gently pulling Kurama back into the bedroom and towards the bed. He placed a pale finger across Kurama's lips. "Not now, but someday." Kurama nodded in agreement and allowed Touya to tuck him into the bed before the Ice Master slipped in behind him, pulling the redhead into his arms. "Just rest, my fox, and know that you are safe and loved." Touya stroked the red hair as Kurama slipped into a light daze, before pulling the covers up over all of them and slipping asleep.

Sunlight slowly streamed into the room to gently lay across the bed and its sleeping occupants and the scent of coffee brewing filled the air.

{OKAY PEOPLE, SORRY TO RUIN THE MORNING AFTER MOOD BUT A CRISIS HAS HAPPENED. UP AND AT 'EM!}

Touya and Kurama rolled to their feet, hands prepared to summon weapons as they looked around for the source of the voice only to blink in confusion when the didn't see anyone.

“Crisis?” Jaden moaned as she cracked one eye open. “I’ll crisis you people upside the head so hard your great-grandchildren will be born ditzy.” She growled as she buried her head a bit more.

{AT LEAST WE BRING COFFEE. SORRY JADEN, BUT THAT FUTURE YOU SAW IN THE BOY'S FANDOM'S ON THE BRINK OF HAPPENING.}

Ed and Al groaned as they slowly woke up and cups of coffee appeared in their hands when they sat up and Ed automatically drained the cup which refilled itself. "Whatizzit?" he mumbled, brushing tangled golden hair out of his face with a slight grimace.

*That* got Jaden awake in a hurry. “The *fuck* you say! That diseased donkey’s ass-munching, goat-raping, son of a penny whore and a rabid sewer rat. I’m gonna kill him myself! When are we leaving?” She ranted as she took her own cup and started downing it.

{AS FAR AS WE CAN FIGURE OUT, THE REASON WHY THE BOYS WERE SENT TO THAT TOWN, WHICH WAS ALL ISHBAL REFUGEES, WAS BECAUSE OF THE SINS. THEY KILLED THE REAL FUHRUR TWO DAYS AFTER INTERCEPTING THE COMMUNICATION WHICH WAS TWO DAYS BEFORE THE BOYS WERE SENT. THEN THE HOMONCULOUS, PRIDE, TOOK THE FUHRUR'S PLACE. THEY FIGURE THAT EITHER THE BOYS WOULD BE TOO DISTRACTED TO NOTICE THE SWITCH OR END UP DEAD AND NO ONE WOULD BE ABLE TO STOP THEM.}

{WE'VE SABOTAGED AS MUCH OF THEIR PLANS AS WE POSSIBLY CAN BUT IT HASN'T STOPPED THEM MUCH. SO, AFTER TALKING WITH THE IMPORTAINT MILITARY FIGURES AND INFORMING THEM OF VARIOUS CERTAIN OUTCOMES, THEY AGREED TO BE MOVED TO THIS DIMENSION ALONG WITH THE ROCKABELLES.}

“Any way we can shut those psychos down so that the rest of that world doesn’t suffer? Or at least lessen the effects?” Jaden asked as she started planning over her second cup of coffee.

{WE'RE WORKING ON IT, BUT THOSE STATE ALCHEMISTS ARE HARD TO CONVINCE AND EVEN MORE DIFFICULT TO GET THEM WORKING TOGETHER THAN A HEARD OF CATS.}

{AS FOR MUSTANG AND HIS GROUP, THEY'VE PLANNED AND PLOTTED WITH HUGHES AND ARMSTRONG FOR THE PAST COUPLE OF DAYS SINCE THEY DISCOVERED THIS AND HAVE FOUND OUT THAT THEIR BEING THERE OR NOT WON'T AFFECT THIS ONE WAY OR ANOTHER, BUT IF THEY LEAVE, THEN HUGHES DOESN'T END UP DEAD.}

Jaden grinned evilly and asked, “If I go back there to help can I have my Dueling Deck with the ability to call up anyone in the deck I need right then? And hell yes we’re pulling Hughes! I watched that episode and damn near cried. I ain’t watching it in real life if I can help it.”

{WE'LL ALSO SEND YAMI AND SETO WITH YOU. KURAMA, TOUYA, CARE TO HELP WITH A GROUP OF HARD TO KILL PSYCHOS WHO WANT TO DESTROY A WORLD JUST TO FIND A WAY TO MAKE THEMSELVES HUMAN?}

Touya glanced at Kurama before bending over to grab his clothes. "Allow us a few moments to bathe and get ready and I will be more than happy to assist," Touya announced and Kurama nodded his agreement as they vanished into the bathroom.

{ANYONE ELSE YOU WANT TO CLAIM TO GO WITH YOU, JADEN? DON'T FORGET THAT AT LEAST ONE OF THE GENERALS IS ON PRIDE'S SIDE AND SOME TWISTED ALCHEMISTS.}

“Am I remembering correctly that Wraith wasn’t all that bad until Envy and them got a hold of him and screwed with his head?” Jaden asked absently as she got up to dress herself.

{SORRY SWEETIE, WRATH'S JUST AS TWISTED AS THE REST OF 'EM NOW.}

“Damn! I was hoping we could at least turn him as much as the end of the series did. Oh well. We’ll want Roy and his crew of good guys, including Hawkeye’s dog. Umm, the Rockabelles, the boy’s teacher if she’ll come and I’ll turn the rest of the list over to the boys,” Jaden rattled off as she tried to remember everybody.

{THEY'RE ALREADY GETTING PULLED OUT. WE WANNA KNOW WHO YOU WANNA TAKE THERE AS CLEAN UP. SO FAR IT'S YOU, YAMI, SETO, TOUYA AND KURAMA. MAYBE HIEI IF WE PROMISE HIM A LOT OF DEATH AND DESTRUCTION.}

{WE'LL EVEN WAIVER THE MARY-SUE CODE SO THAT YOU'RE NOT BUSY TRYING TO KEEP EVERYONE FOCUSED OFF OF YOU AND ON THE TASK.}

“Kick ass. Okay then who the hell else do I want then?” Jaden asked herself out loud before an evil gleam appeared in her eye and she started cackling dementedly. “Oh shit. Evil thought. Ronins plus Anubis, Kenshin and Sano, Ranma and Inuyasha since their together……,” She trailed off as she searched deeper into her encyclopedic memory of fandoms.

{BOYS, YOU'LL WANT TO GET A SHOWER AND GET DRESSED 'CAUSE MUSTANG AND HIS CREW ARE RELOCATING TO THIS DIMENSION PERMANENTLY. IF THEY DON'T LEAVE, WE DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO THE TIMELINE, SO THEY'VE AGREED TO LEAVE AND START UP A SECURITY AND BODYGUARD BUSINESS WHILE THE PACHABELLES START UP THEIR AUTOMAIL SERVICES HERE IN CONJUNCTURE WITH VARIOUS MEDICAL AND MECHANICAL SCHOOLS.}

She snapped her fingers and switched from demented cackling to hyena like laughter, “And can we have Godzilla and Eric Draven. Preferably from the tv series Crow: Stairway to Heaven. Sorry Brandon love but I think Mark’s cuter.”

Kurama and Touya emerged from the bathroom, Touya dressed once more as Kurama moved over to his closet. "There is plenty of hot water left and some clean towels for you," he stated, gently ushering them into the bathroom.

{YOU'LL ALL BE TRANSPORTED TO AN ISLAND THERE TO MINIMIZE CIVILLIAN CASUALTIES SO THE LIZARD CAN PATROL THE WATERS AND KEEP UNFRIENDLIES OUT OF THE SKY.}

“Remember to grab his ‘Papa’ or there’s no way in hell we’ll be able to control him,” Jaden called up quickly.

Kurama pulled out a green long tunic in a Chinese style as well as a white shirt and pants. In a few minutes he was dressed with black slipper-like shoes on his feet and he pulled a wooden box out of his closet, sitting nearby as he flipped through seed packets that were carefully labeled. "If you want Hiei along, we had better talk to him now, because it will take some time to convince him to come," remarked Kurama as he pulled some seeds out of various packets and tucked them away in his hair.

{EVERYONE THAT YOU WANT ALONG WILL INSTANTLY KNOW EVERYTHING THEY NEED TO KNOW TO FIGHT THE SINS' ARMY AS WELL AS WHO THEIR ALLIES ARE. TAUTOPOLOS AND HIS CREW WILL BE ON BOARD THEIR BOAT 'CAUSE WE DON'T NEED ANY OF THEM GETTING HURT BY UNFRIENDLY FIRE.}

“Ye Gods no!!! We don’t need a pissed off, rampaging, 18 story lizard going off cause his Papa and nestmates got hurt,” Jaden squawked as she shuddered.

A set of folded clothes appeared next to Jaden on the bed as Ed and Al emerged from the bathroom. It consisted of flexible body armor that fit like a second skin. {HERE. THIS STUFF WILL STOP PRETTY MUCH EVERYTHING TAHT COMES AT YOU.}

“Niftiness. Thanks,” Jaden chirped as she slid into everything, checking the armor to make sure it had a place for her deck.

There was a slight sound and Hiei stood there, a smirk on his face and blood dancing in his red eyes. "I'm coming with you," he announced, his warded hand twitching slightly in his excitement.

“Rock on. All I ask is that your dragon doesn’t eat any of mine,” Jaden bargained with a grin.

Hiei smirked, and Kurama stood, closing his box and sliding it back into his closet before he placed some empty packets on his desk. "That shouldn't be a problem," stated Kurama with a small smile.

{OKAY, BOYS, YOU'RE GOING TO GENKAI'S TEMPLE. MUSTANG AND HIS GROUP ALONG WITH HUGHES AND HIS FAMILY HAVE BEEN BROUGHT TO AN APARTMENT COMPLEX THAT HAS BEEN CONFISCATED FOR THEM. AND DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE FIRST NATIONAL BRANCH. A SPECIAL LIBRARY WITH EVERY BOOK THEY EVER HAD IS SET UP IN A POCKET DIMENSION FOR YOUR ACCESS.}

{OKAY IS EVERYONE READY? YOU'LL BE LEAVING FROM GENKAI'S PLACE WHICH IS GONNA GET CROWDED WHEN WE SHOW UP.}

“I’m ready to motorgate,” Jaden assured as she rolled her shoulders unconsciously.

Ed slipped on his red coat and handed Al his boots as he pulled his own on. Kurama, Touya and Hiei moved a bit closer and in a flash they were standing in Genkai's courtyard which was filled with various people. Ranma, Inuyasha, Vampire Hunter D, Kenshin and Sano were clustered together while five teenage boys and a young man in strange body armor stood in another cluster with a white tiger. A group of five gargoyle statues were gathered in a group as Gambit, Nightcrawler and a short, stocky man eyed them curiously. A tall, dark haired man was eyeing a slender dark haired man in black clothes and trenchcoat while a dark haired man with a beard and dressed in leather glanced around as a woman in a leather outfit stood nearby with four other men. Duo was glancing around at the strange gathering as his four companion pilots and Zechs stood in a close cluster. Genkai stood on her porch and stared at the assorted mix of characters with a man wearing a vest with his blue hair in a Mohawk, a man dressed in a white garment with wild red hair, Yusuke and Kuwabara.

There was a brief flash of light as a small, redheaded woman in jeans and a shirt that read "Dear Santa, Let me explain..." appeared with Seto and Yami before she walked over to the statues and placed a necklace with an onyx-like stone around each neck, causing the stone shells to fall away, awakening the Manhattan Clan.

The redhead grinned and waved at Jaden before bouncing up onto the porch and letting out a piercing whistle which got everyone's attention. "Yo, people, a brief few words and then you're off to fight. Ryo, I'd suggest that you and your buddies armor up 'cause I don't think you're gonna have time when you get there."

“Hence the reason I didn’t suggest the Sailor Scouts,” Jaden snarked loudly. “Love those girls to death but the talk to much.”

There were six flares of power as the group called upon their armors and in a few brief minutes, each one wore their magical armor. The woman nodded and snapped her fingers, causing several duffle bags to appear at various peoples feet. "Those who can use 'em, guns with ammo, and knives, and especially for our very own Shinigami, explosives!"

There was an excited whoop as Duo started digging through his bag, cackling every now and then as he came across something. "Eric, I know how fond you are of that crow familiar of yours, but he's not gonna be much use to you in the battle, so he's gonna stay with me, but you still get all your nifty neat powers." She snapped her fingers again and a pair of leather gloves appeared in Eric's hand. "You might wanna wear those 'cause you *really* don't need those neat empathic powers of yours to kick in just now."

“Shit! And have him get ahold of a Homunculus?” Jaden shuddered. “Sorry hon. Forgot about that.”

"Manhattan clan, the Powers know you don't kill humans but seven of your opponents are *not* human and while you don't kill, you can sure scare some of them straight," she continued. "Also, at the island battle ground, there will be a boat in the water. I would strongly suggest that you don't aim any of your attacks in their direction 'cause they happen to have an eighteen story fire breathing lizard on their side who gets irritated if anything happens to his 'Daddy'."

She snapped her fingers again and a group of teens in robes appeared, wands in their hands. "Sorry, Harry, you weren't forgotten, but you had to deal with a couple more things before you could show up," called the woman and Harry nodded his understanding. "Nightcrawler, the Powers know that you don't like hurting humans either so you're going to be primarily evac. When someone's injured, you're to teleport them to Mr. Potter and his companions for healing. The exception being Ares, Strife, and Eric." She pointed out the people as she named them.

"Seto, Yami, you will stay close to Jaden so your Decks work. Don't worry about anyone getting through to hurt you 'cause I just got the heads up about someone else wanting to join the party. He's another one you won't have to worry about, Nightcrawler, 'cause Death can't be killed." She looked around at the group of people standing there. "Any questions?"

“Yeah. How the ever loving *hell* did Methos hear about this and where’s SG-1 with some staff weapons and zats?” Jaden yelled up.

"You'd be surprised what Methos knows, Jaden Darling," she shouted back. "SG1 had a quick trip through the Gate but they'll get to the battle even if I have to warp time and get 'em there early.”

“Kick ass cause I want a zat as well. Puts them on their ass without killing them the first shot,” Jaden replied.

Suddenly the woman froze as she was surrounded by a brief light and started swearing. "New game plan people!" she shouted. "The Seven Sins managed to corrupt a few more alchemists and together they turned what was once a human army into a bunch of mindless chimera, which is animals shoved together by alchemy for those who need the definition. There are some water chimera, but let the Big Guy take care of them. So as of this point right now, there are *no* humans on that battlefield, and I'm standing behind the fact that if a human does this to another human against that person's will, they give up their humanity."

“Then I want the Scoobies and the Bat Pack with protection for the vamps in on this,” Jaden called up as she started flipping through her cards to see what she had.

That got furious roars from the gargoyles at the news and there was a flash as Faith, Xander, Willow, Giles, Spike, Buffy and Angel were there, Spike and Angel each had a necklace on with a glowing jewel.

The woman snapped her fingers and appropriate weapons appeared at their feet, causing Xander to let loose a hyena like laugh as he started securing various guns and explosives about his body while the rest of the Scoobies started making a plan. "Okay, you'll be at the island an hour before the Army from Hell shows up so you'll be able to get a better placement and make some plans. The place is mostly rocky desert with a few scrubs, sorry Kurama, but there is one high point on one side of the island which you can look across. It ain't that big to force the Army towards you. This highpoint is a rocky hill that will give you a bit of an advantage as well as additional protection for the wounded. So watch any earth shaking attacks. Got me, Kento?"

“Yes. Let’s not dump the Duelists on their collective asses, please?” Jaden snarked as she checked her Dueling Disk.

The youth in the orange armor laughed and tossed her a thumbs up before the entire courtyard was replaced with an almost barren island about the size of a football field. They were scattered around the rocky hill that had a few large boulders on it and there was a metal boat bobbing out in the water.

“Bout time you showed up," greeted an older man in military BDUs with a vest on that had various pockets bulging. In his arms, he held an assault rifle and at his back was a black man with a gold tattoo on his forehead holding a strange staff and a blond woman also holding an assault rifle.

"Where is this giant lizard JackO'Neil?" inquired the black man, shifting his staff in his hands slightly.

“For that matter, where’s Danny?” Jaden asked as she looked around.

As if his words were a catalyst, there was a rippling in the water, drawing everyone's attention as huge spikes broke the water before a head that defied imagination rose, water dripping off of it as it continued to rise, revealing a muscular form that brought to mind a cross between a T-Rex and an iguana with developed forearms that indicated it could *definitely* use them to grab. The spikes ran down its back and tail, and it opened its mouth to let loose a challenging roar.

“Hey, Big Guy. How goes it?” Jaden called up to him.

Jack stared at Godzilla before tearing his eyes away as murmurs rippled through the rag tag army ranging from the startled curses coming from Ryo, Kento and Anubis to the excited "Cool!" from Lexington.

"He's back there getting the sorta hospital set up along with Janet." Jack replied almost absently as he gestured behind a large cluster of boulders. Godzilla let out another screeching roar before slipping back into the water, vanishing completely.

Seto pointed to a large flat rock near the top of the hill. "There is the perfect spot for us," he stated, starting that way with Yami at his side. "It should provide us with ample line of sight." Eric and Methos followed them, exchanging information and plans in quiet voices as they talked.

“Gotta love that guy.” She muttered with a grin. The she clapped her hands to get everyone’s attention. “Okay, first order of business, see the little metal boat? Don’t let anything happen to the little metal boat. Godzilla’s Papa and nestmates are in that boat. They are the only reason Zilla doesn’t rampage.” Jaden explained, raising her voice a bit so that everyone could hear. “Next those on healing duty, if you could go ahead and head that direction so that you can meet everybody and they can decide where you need to be? Thanks. Goliath, if you’ve got an extra ear piece would you be so kind as to lend it to Nightcrawler? And if one of you guys would be willing to play spotter for him to jump to when someone goes down? Everybody else set yourselves up however you like. The boys and I are going to be here calling in our friends so if beings and things just sudden start to happen around you and there wasn’t an obvious reason from their side, it was us and whatever it showed up is friendly. Watch out for the Sins. They’re inhuman shapeshifts that can look like anybody so if someone you know starts acting weird knock them out and apologize later if needed.”

Goliath reached into the pouch at his waist and pulled out an extra earpiece and mic, holding it out to Nightcrawler who took it with a "Danken" and fitted it in. "Angela, you are the fastest of us, and will inform Nightcrawler of any injured that need to be retrieves," he instructed. "That is to be your primary duty."

The young female gargoyle nodded with a "Yes Father."

Brooklyn looked around and frowned, the slight wind tugging at his white hair. "So how are we going to get airborne?" he asked, gesturing to the lack of high surfaces. "The wind down here isn't strong enough to lift us.”

“I wonder if we could get ‘Zilla to give you a lift?” Jaden mused as she looked out at the boat.

A walkie talkie suddenly appeared on Jaden's belt and squawked to life. "Yo, jefe! Anyone minding the station?" called a young voice.

“Hey. Did your ears burn cause we were just talkin’ ‘bout you?” Jaden chirped. “Got a question for ya, think ‘Zilla would mind terribly if he gave a group of our troops a lift? They’re flyers but they tend to glide more that fly.”

"No, he won't mind," came a new voice with a calm levelheadedness. "He probably won't bother them as long as they stay over the island."

“Coolness. Oh and I have a couple of aqua type friends I could probably talk into guarding the boat if you want and he doesn’t mind. I promise they won’t bother you and should help keep the nasties away,” Jaden offered.

"I wouldn't chance it. He's rather territorial," came the reply before the radio died and there was a shout of "GODZILLA!" and the massive head rose from the water as a giant four fingered hand was placed on the ground, palm up.

“I think that’s your ride, guys,” Jaden suggested as she giggled at the squawk the radio had given.

The gargoyles climbed onto the hand and held on as it rose into the air before they spread their wings, launching themselves from their elevated height. The rest of the army was starting to find positions and dig down with the Ronin Warriors and Anubis close to the water on the left side and the Scoobies on the opposite side of the line that was forming before the hill.

Next to the Scoobies was the Gundam boys and Zechs, all digging in their bags and getting things ready while Casey Ryback double checked all of his guns. Xander and Duo started talking about the different explosives and Willow came over to listen to them before she started suggesting a short range teleportation spell to "seed" the ground with explosives which got Giles dragged into it.

The Reiken Tante and their allies started ribbing each other good naturedly as they set up, spreading out a bit to cover more ground. Hiei had stripped off his cloak and scarf while Kurama shifted to his Youko form as Yusuke also shifted to his demonic form, cackling at something Jin said. Touya dug a small pit as Chuu started chugging from a large bottle, the alcoholic fumes already filling the air. He lowered the bottle and was instantly sick in the small pit before staggering upright with a grin on his face. Rolling his eyes, Touya filled the pit back in, cutting the disgusting smell.

Jaden snapped her fingers and hunted through her deck then called over to Kurama, “Hey Kurama I’ve got a friend you’ll like. Fairy King Truesdale, please attend.” She summoned as a young elf looking man with large stain glass wings appeared and gazed at her expectantly. “See the silver fox man? Please guard and help him. He’s a Plant Master.” The Fairy King nodded and drifted over to stand beside the kitsune. “He’ll boost you’re attack and defense and those of your plants by a good bit.” She explained.

The Fairy King approached Kurama before shrinking and fluttering up to perch between Kurama's ears, tiny hands holding onto silver hair. "Thank you , Jaden," replied Kurama.

“It’s cool. I’m just glad I remembered him.” She said nonchalantly as she shuffled her deck.

Logan and Gambit were tossing curious looks at Ranma and Inuyasha who were talking in soft voices and laughing. D drew his long sword and stood between Inuyasha and Kenshin who pulled his crimson hair up into a high tail before pulling his sakabatou off his waist. "I will not be able to fight with this, that I will not." In a flash, the sakabatou was replaced with a kitana and a wakisashi as Kenshin's clothes changed from his rurouni outfit to that of a hitorkiri of the Ishin Shinshi.

Ares, Xena, Hercules, Iolus, Jett, and Strife spread out a bit with the four mortals stretching and getting warmed up for the big battle. Ares and Strife talking in hushed voices as they also made and discarded strategies.

The SG1 trio filled in the final gap of the main line with Teal’c and Jack nodding politely at the armored youths while Harry, Draco, Neville, Ron and Hermione arranged themselves on the hill around the Duelists as Snape, Pomfrey, Sprout and McGonagall joined Janet and Daniel in the make-shift hospital.

“Okay. We settled and basically happy?” Jaden quipped as she finished her survey.

No one moved, instead, busied themselves for the upcoming battle. Willow and Giles were chanting softly, causing bits of explosives to vanish almost as fast as Xander and Duo could put them together. All over the field, far enough away to keep their own allies out of danger, small flashes appeared, indicating where the explosives ended up.

{GET READY EVERYONE. WE GOTTA BRING 'EM IN NOW!}

“Let’s rock and roll.” Jaden called out over the troops before turning to her fellow Duelists and saying with great relish and a grin, “Gentlemen. Let’s Duel.”

A tenseness fell over the area, the silence broken as weapons were drawn and primed as strange people started appearing opposite of them. They appeared to be a mix of human and various ferocious beasts, cats, bears, canines, reptiles, birds, almost anything deadly that the creators could get their hands on. In the middle of the group appeared seven people with a half dozen normal humans. The shapely woman snarled something to the monsters and they started forward.

"FIRE IN THE HOLE!" shouted Xander as both he and Duo pressed their detonators. Over two dozen explosions rocked the island, sending monsters flying into the air with cries that were more animal than human, some of monsters didn't get back up after they hit the ground, but there were still over fifty creatures there.

"FLARE UP NOW!" "THUNDERBOLT CUT!" "SUPER WAVE SMASHER!" "IRON ROCK CRUSHER!" "ARROW SHOCKWAVE!" "QUAKE WITH FEAR!" "SPIRIT SHOTGUN!" The magical attacks flared out, eliminating more of the army but still leaving many beings there.

“That was epically cool. Shall we join in the fun?” Jaden asked as she pulled her first cards and checked them, watching out of the corner of her eye as the other two did the same. “I call upon the Red Eyes Black Dragon! Bane, a little help please?” She called out as she slapped the card down onto her duel disk in attack mode. There was a flash of light and suddenly a huge black dragon came winging in, taking out a section of the enemy with a fiery blast.

There were more flashes as more chimeras appeared, seeming to replace the fallen numbers and the sounds of automatic fire and a staff weapon filled the air. Finally the flashes stopped, and the chimera army moved forward again, the last of their numbers arriving.

Seto snarled as three cards were slapped down. "I call forth Blue Eyes White Dragon times three to form Blue Eyes Ultimate!" There was a screech as three white dragons appeared before melding into one huge three-headed dragon that followed it's dark brother into battle.

Once the chimeras grew close enough for hand to hand combat, the Ronins and Anubis abandoned their mystical attacks to engage them as those more comfortable with close quarters combats entered the battle with war cries.

Touya peppered the chimeras with his sniper attack while Jin pushed them back with his wind. Kurama's plants started sprouting and either wrapping the chimeras in leafy vines or devouring them as Hiei's blade flashed and flickered, slicing his opponents in small pieces.

Kenshin drew his katana and found himself falling back into the desperate routine that he had not used since the end of the Bakumatsu as D slashed along beside him with Inuyasha drawing the Tetsusaiga and following them. Ranma and Sano were able to take the various chimera they faced with cards exploding against others as Gambit drove them back. With an animal like roar, Logan jumped into the frey, claws flashing as a blood-lust descended on him.

Ares hurled a few fireballs at the army before he drew his sword, wading through the twisted monsters with his allies at his side. Strife cackled and fought side by side with Jett as they slowly made their way through the army, heading for the group of apparent humans. Xena and Iolus held their own as Herculese simply picked the chimera up and tossed them at the oncoming chimera.

“Seto. We need to see if our dragons can take out that knot of humans in the center. They’re the ones controlling to chimeras. Yugi if you want to bring in Mahado have at it,” Jaden suggested as she caught Bane’s attention and directed him to take out the ‘humans’.

Yami placed two cards down as the Blue eyes Ultimate Dragon screeched overhead, heading for the so-called humans. "Dark Magician. Dark Magician Girl, come forth," he called and the two appeared, starting to cast various spells at the opposing army.

As the dragons grew closer, one of the humans lifted his hand, cackling, as alchemical charge danced over his arm before striking the dragons, causing them to explode in a shower of glittering fragments.

“Ohhh! You *DID NOT* just destroy our dragons!!” Jaden screeched as she slipped Bane’s card into the graveyard. She drew two cards and slapped them on her disk, “Summoned Skull! Gaia the Fierce Knight! Roast those turkeys!”

Seto snarled "Dark Zebra!" he cried and the zebra unicorn tore off down the hill, leaping over the line of allies to charge into the fray.

The gargoyles swooped down, knocking chimera into each other and causing a chaotic mess behind the lines before climbing into the sky again.

As the ammo ran out, the Gundams, Zechs, Ryback and Xander launched into hand to hand combat, holding their own against the mutated men as the various weapons and fighting techniques started whittling down the army's numbers.

A few chimera slipped into the water to try and get around that way only to scream in surprise when Godzilla rose out of the water and swallowed them with a crunch.

Jaden pulled a few magic and trap cards calling out, “Fissure! Trap Hole! Monster Reborn! Bane return!” And sat back to watch a large fissure run under part of the chimera army, a huge pit open up under part of the Homunculus and alchemists knot, and Bane to come roaring back into existence.

Kimblee screamed as he fell into the pit, none of his allies bothering to save him.

"Ryo, we need the Inferno!" called Sage, calculating the distance between what was left of the army and the knot of people climbing back onto their feet.

"Right, let's do it!" Ryo shouted as Anubis moved in front of the boys to hold off the attackers while they did what they had to.

There was a swirl of magic and light that surrounded the five boys that lasted an eternity of seconds before Ryo stood there in a fierce white armor. White Blaze burst into flames and when they died, he was clad in a version of the same white armor over his now black body with two huge swords strapped to his side. "Anubis fall back!" shouted Ryo as he drew the swords and started channeling the intense heat that was the power of the Inferno Armor.

Jaden heard the call for Inferno when Ryo started it and instantly called up some more cards, “Mysty! Stone Gaint! Go protect the ones in colored armor.” She ordered as she pointed to where the other Ronins where.

Flames licked at his swords and armor before increasing into a white-hot nova that lashed out at the knot of 'commanders'. "RAGE OF THE INFERNO!"

Those that had been in front of Ryo were instantly incinerated as the ground turned to rocky glass under the passing of the attack. Most of the group was able to get out of the way in time except for a squat fat person with a long tongue who opened his mouth as if he was going to devour the attack only to be swept up in it.

“And there went Gluttony. Cool. We’re slowly but surely picking these bastards off,” Jaden murmured as she checked the rest of the field.

The Mystic Elf and the Stone Giant moved before the armored figures who were desperately trying to stay on their feet after the huge power drain and Ryo was briefly surrounded by a burst of fire which cleared to leave him standing in his Wildfire armor. He took a step towards the battle only to have his legs fold up under him as he collapsed to the ground.

"Nightcrawler! The man in red armor's down!" Angela reported from her position in the sky and Nightcrawler appeared in a puff of smoke before grabbing Ryo and teleporting him back to the hospital.

A man who had been crossed with a rhino and a kangaroo hopped over the defensive line and started straight for the Duelers only to be cut in half by Methos' sword.

“Ewww, chucky bits. Okay. Every time we’ve tried to hit the main group they’ve been able to dodge. Someone has Foresight. Take them out and they’re screwed. Who was it?” Jaden muttered to herself as she tried to think. Suddenly her head snapped up and she snapped her fingers, “Pride!! That’s who has Foresight. He’s able to predict any and all outcomes. So how the hell do we get around that?”

Yami smirked. "Send everything we can at them from various angles and hope to overwhelm them," he stated in a calm, almost detached voice as he started summoning creatures, sending them towards the cluster.

Hiei snarled as his latest opponent fell and jumped back a step, sheathing his sword as his warded arm came up. Ripping the wards off, he revealed a black dragon tattooed up his arm and black fire enveloped his form. The rest of the Tantei moved away as they saw the fire. "Jyaoh Ensatsu Kokuryuuha!"

“Shit! This ought to be interesting.” Jaden yelped as she placed her three Man-Eater Bugs behind the Homunculi, hoping to get at least one of them munched.

The black fire boiled off of his arm, straight into the sky to form a red eyed black dragon before it fell with a fearsome shriek on the knot of people who again scrambled out of the way. The dragon homed in on the one wearing an eyepatch and opened its massive jaws, snapping at him as he screamed in denial before he was incinerated along with a Man-eating bug. The other two latched onto a young teen with green hair and what looked like a little boy before there was a brief struggle and the Bugs won.

“It’s a good thing I’m used to sacrificing those guys or I’d be pissed,” Jaden joked as she watched the carnage.

The Black Dragon vanished as the tattoo reappeared on Hiei's arm before all color drained from his face and he collapsed, the Tantei moving back in to protect their fallen comrade before Nightcrawler appeared to whisk him off. "Here, wrap the tattoo again," instructed Kurama, holding out the warding bandages. Nightcrawler grabbed them with his tail before vanishing again.

Pieces of bodies were scattered around D, Battousai, and Inuyasha as Ranma and Sano kept any from attacking the swordsmen’s' backs. Even the SG1 were down to hand to hand combat at the moment.

“And now that Mister Predict is out of the way,” Jaden muttered as she called in another dragon. “Cobalt! Come help Bane!” And her Blue Eyes White Dragon appeared. “Light their fires, boys.” She ordered as she pointed out the targets.

The dragons screeched through the air attracting Godzilla's attention and he looked at the small cluster of people trying to dodge the dragon's attack. Adding his own cry, blue light lit up the spikes running down his back as a glow started deep in his throat.

“Shit!!! Don’t hit my dragons, please?!?!” Jaden yelped as she turned to see what had gotten Godzilla’s attention.

Exhaling, Godzilla turned the small part of the island into a mirror as the two dragons twisted around to add their flames to the inferno, keeping out of their bigger "brother's" line of fire. In a few minutes, there was nothing left of the human-looking group except a few wisps of smoke.

“Now then. All that’s left is clean up,” Jaden said with a hint of satisfaction in her voice.

By the time the last chimera fell to Battousai's sword, the ground was littered with bodies and many were bloodstained with some ripped clothing and scratches. Battousai looked around as the gold faded from his eyes to reveal injured violet and his sword fell from his bloodied hands as he staggered backwards.

"I broke my promise," he said in a flat voice, staring out over the carnage. "Even if they were no longer human, I still killed."

“And now the breakdowns begin,” Jaden muttered resignedly as she moved over to the Rurouni. “Would you have rather they destroy the entire world? That’s what would have happened. Millions of innocent lives were saved today by this battle. Yes you killed again but it *was* necessary.”

A firm hand reached out and grasped Kenshin's shoulder, causing him to look up at D. "You did what you had to do," stated the dhampire. "If you had not helped to hold the line with us, we could have been overpowered and they had a chance of winning from sheer numbers. We do not know how tough they were and if you had used a non-lethal sword, you might have been among the first fallen."

Jaden drifted off, confident that D could handle the swordsman. “How’s everyone else doing?” She asked as she wandered up and down the ragged line.

Duo grimaced as he looked down at his torn shirt. "Could use some R&R and a hot bath," he muttered.

Kurama shifted back to his human form and sagged slightly in Touya's arms as he reached up and gently grasped the Fairy King. "I believe he is yours," murmured the fox with a small smile. "Thank you my little friend for your help."

“Oh yeah I should probably send these guys home, huh?” Jaden said as she took the little fairy and nuzzled him a bit in thanks. The she raised her voice so the dragons could hear her, “Okay guys. Thanks for the help and go ahead and go home if you want. You’ve earned the rest.”

{THANK YOU EVERYONE. AS A REWARD, WE'VE GOT A HOT SPRINGS RESORT RENTED FOR EVERYONE TO RECOVER IN AND HAVE A BIT OF DOWN TIME.}

The area shifted again and everyone found themselves standing in front of a large two storey building with the scent of minerals in the air. {RYO AND HIEI ARE FINE AND IN THEIR ROOMS. EACH GROUP HAS A SUITE WITH YOUR NAME ON THE DOOR. RYBACK, YOU'RE WITH LOGAN, GAMBIT AND NIGHTCRAWLER. D, RANMA, INUYASHA, KENSHIN AND SANO, YOU'RE ALSO TOGETHER.}

“Damn those are going to be wild parties,” She snarked quietly as she grinned and started hunting for her room.

D slid his sword back into its sheath and replaced Kenshin's swords as well before leading the bloodstained man into the building with the others trickling in behind him. The gargoyles perched up on the roof, looking around at the mountainous surroundings with various rivers and streams trickling across the grass.

{HEY JADEN, ANYWHERE IN PARTICULAR YOU WANNA BE? THE MARY-SUE CODE'S STILL SUSPENDED.}

“Well, since I’m still traveling with them, go ahead and put me with the Elrics if they don’t mind. I think I’m going to check on everyone first though,” Jaden said with a shrug.

{ THE ELRICS ARE BACK AT GENKAI'S TEMPLE BUT WE CAN BRING 'EM HERE IF YA WANT.}

“Or send me there. Either way’s fine,” Jaden chirped tiredly. “Now that I think about it, I’m sure the docs and healers are going to check everyone over.”

There was a small flash and Ed and Al stood there, concern in their almost matching eyes as they stared at her.

“Relax. It’s over and we won. All the Homunculi are eaten or roasted and all the chimeras have been given peace. No deaths on our side and only two that are really down and that’s cause they used their ultimate attacks and that always drains them. Want to come help check on everybody? Then we can find a room and cuddle,” Jaden reported quickly as she gave each of them a hug.

Ed and Al nodded, their arms around her waist as they walked through the resort. Janet's team of doctors were flitting from suite to suite to help bandage people up and dispense painkillers where needed while the wizards helped out with healing spells and potions.

Hushed voices came from the suite where D, Kenshin and the others were staying but no one answered their polite knock so they moved on to almost be trampled by the Scoobies and their vampires racing for the hot pools.

Heero, Wifei and Zechs passed them by a bit later, discussing politics or something like that as Trowa and Quatre followed some feet behind, quietly talking about anything and everything as Duo dragged his feet behind them.

Jaden snagged Duo by the braid, “What’s wrong?”

Duo blinked up at her, the loneliness and longing in his eyes vanishing as he smirked at her. "Ah, just being a baka," he replied, before his eyes involuntarily flashed to his allies who were quite obviously grouped together.

“Wait a minute. I thought you and Trowa and Quatre were a trio?” Jaden queried quietly as she drew him farther away so as not to be overheard.

Duo sighed. "They let me cuddle with 'em but they haven't said anything about wanting me with 'em for good," he confessed, running an irritated hand through his bangs.

Jaden glared at the retreating backs before barking out, “Bangs! Blondie! Front and center! Now!”

Trowa and Quatre turned and started back, confusion on their faces as Duo flushed in embarrassment. "What's wrong?" asked Quatre, reaching out to caress the tangled chestnut hair.

“It seems that our adorable Mister Maxwell here thinks that you don’t want to keep him for good. Is he correct in his assumption?” Jaden growled as she glared that the two boys.

Quatre stared at Duo in disbelief before sighing. "Looks like I'm going to have to get a collar and leash for you, Duo," remarked Quatre with a smirk. "Yes I have been busy with WEI but I didn't think you had been shoved out of our bed." Trowa shook his head, indicating that he hadn't shoved Duo out.

“So are we fixing this oversight?” Jaden asked a bit calmer as she raised an eyebrow.

Quatre smirked and grabbed Duo's arm, dragging the stunned teen after him with Trowa throwing them a small smile as he followed after his lovers.

Ed grinned. "Looks like someone's gonna be getting lucky in the near future," he drawled.

“Umm. I have a feeling once everyone soaks out the aches a lot of people are going to get lucky in the near future,” Jaden corrected with a wicked grin. “Wanna go see if anyone wants help with that?”

Al blinked innocently. "Who would you be interested in?"

“Honey, half the people I pulled into this I want to tip into bed. It’d work better with some than with others cause of curses or soulmates,” Jaden giggled as she found a spot to think.

Sano wandered down the hall with a stunned look on his face. "Gotta warn Ranma and Inuyasha about walking into the bathroom without knocking," he muttered, passing them without really seeing them.

The three looked at each other then as one turned and headed down the way Sano had come from to see what was going on.

The door to the suite was partially opened and D was stretched out on the couch with a sleeping Kenshin in his arms and a distinct wound on his shoulder where it could be seen under the partially opened bathrobe.

“Awww. They’re so cute together.” Jaden whispered as she leaned against the doorjam.

Violet and blue eyes opened and stared at her, calmly as if asking more why she was there instead of accusing her of staring at them.

“I wanted to see what had Sano in such a state. You forgot to lock the door. Go back to napping guys, I’ll hang the ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign,” Jaden answered as she reached around the door and grabbed said sign, hanging it on her side and firmly shutting the door.

Ed and Al looked at each other before giggling like little boys.

“Well since those two apparently don’t want playmates shall we keep hunting?” Jaden quipped as she turned and looked at them.

Ed and Al nodded, slipping their arms back around her waist. "Think Kurama and Touya are around here somewhere?" Al asked with a faint blush.

Jaden nodded. “Should be. Wanna go play with them some more?”

Nodding, they followed Jaden through the building until they reached the suite marked "Yu Yu Hakusho".

“Knock, knock folks. Everybody clothed?” Jaden called through the door as she knocked.

Yusuke opened the door and grinned at them. "Yeah we're all descent," he replied with a smirk. "And Kuwabara's even got clothes on."

"I heard that, Urameshi!" shouted Kuwabara, emerging from the bathroom with his sweatpants one.

“Mind if we come pester you guys for awhile? Everyone else seems to be doing okay and Ed and Al here wanted to check up on Kurama and Touya,” Jaden chirped as she tilted her head and tried to look cute.

"Hiei's still asleep, and Kurama and Touya were talking about finding a hot spring with some plants around it," Yusuke remarked, picking up the bandage and wrapping it around Chuu's upper arm where a lucky strike of a claw had ripped the skin open.

“We’ll go pester Kurama and Touya then. Which way did they head?” Jaden asked as she held the bandage still for Yusuke.

Jin grinned. "Towards th' back where there were a few more isolated springs," he reported.

“Cool. Thanks.” She giggled as she gave an ear a tug and started hunting for the fox and ice demon.

They managed to make their way out the back and found a stone-lined path that lead them up a small hill and into a thick grove of trees where Touya was cuddling a tired Kurama in the hot water, their clothes in a messy pile nearby.

They looked up at the trio and Kurama smiled before waving them over. "Come join us," he invited. "The water is wonderful.”

“That sounds like an excellent idea. My back’s killing me,” Jaden groaned as she finally let herself feel all the aches and pains. She stripped down and climbed in and just sorta melted into the water. “Much better.”

In a few seconds, Ed and Al were in the water with them as well, gently cuddling Jaden as Touya ran a wet hand through Kurama's hair.

“So. How’s everyone liking the new reality they’ll be living in,” Jaden asked after awhile.

Ed smiled. "Aunt Pinako and Winry have already had a few demands for automail with Genkai helping them set the prices, and have even started cross training a few doctors," he began. "Mustang's managed to get that bodyguard and security business going with a couple people interested in repeat business after finding out that they're ex-military. Gracia and Alicia are acting like they never left home."

“What about Hughes and Hawkeye?” She asked as she started petting the boys.

"Hawkeye's enjoying her time in the company as well," Al reported with a grin. "And Hughes has been spending his time with his family but plans on joining Mustang's company soon."

“Good. I was kinda worried about Hawkeye. She’s so military it’s scary.”

Touya gazed into the distance. "I'll see what I can do about setting them up with some of our intelligence contacts," he remarked, his hand bringing water up to Kurama's hair, staining it a dark red.

“Oh. D fixed Kenshin’s guilt problem. Little hard to feel guilty when you brain’s been screwed out of your head and your bones are mush. Poor Sano walked in on them though. I think he’s still walking around in a daze,” Jaden reported with a giggle.

Touya and Kurama chuckled at that comment, the fox not moving from Touya's lap as his head rested on a pale shoulder. He yawned. "I'm sorry I'm not better company," he apologized. "I had forgotten how tiring it was to keep so many plants active at once."

“I think all of us that fought are going to be dragging once we let ourselves. You boys mind playing keepers for us?” Jaden asked the brothers with her own yawn.

The brothers shook their heads. "We'll make sure none of you drowned," Al said.

“Good teddy bears. Night,” Jaden mumbled as she snuggled in and passed out.

When Jaden woke up it was to find herself facing a still sleeping Kurama with an arm that looked suspiciously like Touya’s flung over his side. She shifted a bit, carefully, and felt the brothers behind. One of them tightening the arm that was flung over *her* side. “Huh. I remember this scene from when I first got here. Except there are more bodies now. Gotta love PTB transport,” she muttered as she carefully stretched, trying not to wake anyone up.

Kurama sighed and snuggled in closer to her as Touya moved closer to his fox.

“Hey, PTBs, did everyone make it home okay?” Jaden quietly asked as she petted some hair out of Kurama’s face for him.

{YEAH EVERYONE MADE IT HOME OKAY. EVEN KENSHIN AND D.}

“Separately or together?” she queried with a wicked grin.

{SEPARATELY UNFORTUNATELY.}

Kurama stirred in her arms and blinked up at her with mostly asleep green eyes.

“Damn. Oh well, D has a Xander and a Spike back there so he’s good. Kenshin will sort himself out or I’ll give him to Hiei maybe,” Jaden groused as she plotted. “So am I staying here or heading to a new fandom?”

{YOU GOT ANYWHERE ELSE YOU WANNA RUN THROUGH OR YOU JUST WANNA STAY HERE WITH THE BOYS AND THE DEMONS?}

“I think I want to stay with the boys and demons. If they’ll have me permanently?” Jaden chirped as she gazed into those sleepy eyes.

A slow, sensual smile slid across Kurama's face. "I would be more than happy to keep you and your boys," he purred, shifting into his youko form and nuzzling her neck. "It shouldn't be that hard to get a condo or even a house for us."

“Ummm. A house with a big back yard so that you can garden and the boys can have a dog if they want. I get a cat at least. Shall we wake the others and see what they say?” Jaden chirped laughingly as the nuzzle.

Touya sighed as he woke up. "Looks like Youko Kurama's on the prowl," he teased, running a hand through that silver hair.

"I like cats," mumbled Al against her back as he snuggled a bit farther and he yelped in surprise when Ed's metal hand brushed against his warm skin to settle on Jaden's arm, the chilled metal quickly raising goose bumps.

“So are we all in agreement that we’re living together and the boys and I stay in this reality?” Jaden asked as she tried to see everyone.

"Sounds like a plan to me," mumbled Ed before he slipped back asleep and Kurama and Touya nodded, both smirking at the adorable picture the brothers made.

“Then I officially declare this Mary-Sue fic to be done. Stick a fork in it. Whatever,” Jaden announced as she snuggled back in to either sleep or let the fox play. Whichever happened first.

Kurama chuckled and dipped his head to steal a kiss. "Then it's done," he murmured.

(Fade to Black)

THE END